AMY
It wasn't that I can't see that you were fat because.. well, you are. But only when I really look.
The first time I saw you, you sang... And that's all you had to do to take my breath away. Of course there were a bunch of you messing up the same notes of the same song. But you messed it up so beautifully it was impossible for me to hate it.
The next time I saw you was just a few days later. I honestly thought I'd forget you, just like every other time I found a girl attractive. But then you walked in donning that red dress displaying all your lovely curves and I knew, right there and then, that you're not like any of those girls. Not at all. You swayed your hips so effortlessly and graciously, I was so sure it wasn't normal. Not right that there's ever a person capable of being that beautiful. It was too much. Too much for any girl... or for anybody really. But you are not anybody are you? Not a girl; but a woman. And when you walked up to me, The woman.
You opened your mouth and I didn't quite catch what you were saying so my bumbling mouth just continued on its verbal ineptitude and rambled out words miles away from the truth.
"You... Are probably the grossest human being I've ever seen." I said.
The way your face instinctively contorted in disgust was probably the most adorable reaction I have ever seen.
"You're no panty dropper yourself..." You replied.
I didn't expect you to be so funny and you were. I swear I would have laughed if I wasn't so mesmerized by the fact that you're hilarious. Instead, my mouth twitched awkwardly. As if every fibre in my body is rebelling against the distracting fact that I am starting to like you. And not 'like' in a 'You seem nice' kind of like but 'like' in a way that I can't even begin to process why. Because really, why? I don't know you. All I know is that in the few minutes I've laid my eyes on you and the few words you've uttered to me, I can't dare part from you. That kind of like. But my body isn't the most cooperative. Since ever actually. Why else would I channel my competitive nature into music instead of sports. And so with all my awkwardness, I get the message that my body is trying to tell me you're too much. Too much for me. But even if I can't possibly have you, I should at least try.. or so I thought.
"I get a feeling we should kiss." I tried.
"I sometimes get a feeling that I can do crystal meth but then I think, hmmm.. Better not."
To say I was insulted is not true at all. I was disappointed. That's more accurate. All because at that moment you compared me to crystal meth. You had me. I know people say 'you had me at hello.' But you... You had me at crystal meth.
I can see it right then. You and me, and I want it. I want it bad. So it wasn't that you were not obviously fat but because you are so much more than that. You are beautiful, hilarious and just absolutely wonderful; and when you said "Fat Amy" was your name, I can't seem to understand why of all adjectives applicable to you, you settled with that.
Now, I keep thinking of all the other adjectives you could replace 'fat' with but my limited vocabulary fails me. You don't have to replace it really. Let's just take it away completely. Because its already perfect, your name.. You. Amy.
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