Ruined? Chapter One

BPOV

I knew my life was ruined, or at least it felt like it. Sitting on the edge of the bathtub, waiting impatiently for the results. I'm only sixteen for god's sake.

Isabella Swan. Known as Bella. Sixteen, and possibly pregnant.

A couple months back, my best friend and I went to a party that was being held by her boyfriend. It was a must go. When we arrived, we decided to enjoy the night, we danced, had a few beers – which tasted horrible, I should say – and just mingling with our friends. It was overall a good night.

But I also met him, Edward Mason Cullen, and gosh was he gorgeous. We talked, danced, kissed, and ended up in a bedroom together stripping each other off and… Well you get the gist of it, and now here I am, two months later, sitting in my bathroom waiting to see if I am pregnant.

My head was spinning, and I really don't what I would do. I don't think I'd be able to abort the baby, and I knew people who went through adoption and wasn't sure if I was able to do that. But I was also only sixteen and don't know if I'd be able to keep it. Then there was Edward, I didn't really hear from him since the party, but as far as I know, he lived in Alaska with his cousins.

As I said, my head was spinning.

Suddenly, I was brought out of my thoughts by the loud chiming noise of my alarm, telling me that the five minutes were up. Trying to get my breathing together, before I start hyperventilating. I got up off the tub, and went to the counter where three tests rested, awaiting me to see their results. I could have sworn both my breathing and my heart stopped when I saw the results.

I'm pregnant.

Sixteen and Pregnant.

I was startled by a loud knocking on the bathroom door.

"Bells, are you okay in there? You've been in there for a while!" Charlie said behind the door.

"Yeah dad, just about to take a shower, I am not feeling too well." I replied. Trying to hide the shakiness in my voice.

"Okay Bells, take your time. There's money on the counter, I need to go out, got a call from the station, and won't be too long. Will see you soon." He spoke, his footsteps slowly getting farther away with each step.

Oh gosh, what will Charlie think? Sure we haven't been very close, but I'm still his little girl, and he isn't afraid to tell me when he thinks I need to do better – with school, friends, boys, etc.

Pushing aside those thoughts, I turned around and turned the shower on. While the water was heating up, I stripped down and looked in the mirror. I wasn't really showing yet, but I could see the difference, it was there. I can swear though, once I have this baby, I am going on abstinence as birth control. Seemed legitimate, right? Or maybe I could become a nun?

I stopped staring at my stomach, and got under the warm spray of the shower. All I could do was sit down in the tub and let the spray calm my muscles, while my mind raced with options, thoughts, fears, all coming in one go.

I knew I needed to go to the doctors, for one. I need to make sure everything is okay. Another thing to worry about, if people I knew saw me. I know I would have to hear the rumours at some point, but I don't know if I am ready for this. I don't think I am ready for any of it.

Finally, I cleaned myself up, washed my face, quickly dried myself, dressed and went to my bedroom. I don't think I slept at all that night. I didn't bother waiting for Charlie to get home, and say goodnight, I know that if I saw him, it would all come flooding out. I can't lie to save my life. After what seemed like hours and at 3 a.m. I fell asleep to the sounds of the rain hitting the roof.

*********************

I got out of bed in the morning, and grabbed my mobile off of my nightstand. I went downstairs, and made myself some toast, and a cup of tea. My nerves were going crazy at this point. Checking to see if Charlie wasn't home, so he didn't hear the conversation, I dialled up the number of the local doctor surgery.

The receptionist picked up on the third ring.

"Good Morning, Helen speaking, Forks Medical, how may I help you?"

"Uh, yes, I was wondering If I could get a doctors appointment?" I asked, warily. I didn't know of Helen, but knowing this small town, she most likely knew who I was.

"Sure, we have one in the next hour if you'd like to attend then?" She asked, I could hear the clicking of her fingers typing on the keyboard.

"Yeah, that should be fine." I sighed.

"Great! Now, could I get a name and the weather of this appointment please? You'll be seeing Doctor Taylor today, a female doctor."

"Uh yeah, it's Isabella Swan, and the appointment is to verify a pregnancy test." I said quietly.

"Okay Isabella," Disappointment laced in her voice. Yeah, she knew who I was. "The appointment is set, see you soon. Bye." With that, she hung up after I whispered a goodbye.

I walked upstairs, went to my dresser and put on some loose pants and baggy shirt, sneakers on too. Throwing my hair in a ponytail. I sat on the front porch of my house for forty-five minutes, staring out into the distance, until I realised I had to leave.

When I got near the hospital, I parked about five minutes down the road, so that way no one could get the chance to see my truck parked in the medical centre's parking. I walked the trip, and entered the building, walking up to the reception desk.

"Hello, how may I help you?" The lady at the counter asked.

"I'm Isabella, I'm here to see Dr Taylor." I replied, quietly.

She clicked her mouse a few times before replying.

"Ah yes, you're here for confirmation of pregnancy, am I correct?" I nodded, yes. "Okay, the doctor will be out soon. I need you to fill out these forms for her, in the meantime, I'll get you to take a seat over there." She handed me a clip board with forms to fill out, and pointed me to where I need to sit with a small comforting smile on her face. Pity was also evident in her eyes.

I sat down in the chairs, and filled out the forms as much as I could, making sure I got everything I needed down. Just as I finished up my last question, the receptionist called out my name, and directed me to the room I needed to go to. I got up quickly, looking around to see if there was anyone I knew around, then walked brusquely towards the room.

In the room there was a white bed off to the side, with what looked like a computer next to it. There was a desk on the other side, just next to the door with a single chair for patients. I sat down, and handed the doctor my forms.

"As you already know, I'm Dr. Taylor," she spoke sweetly. "Isabella, it says you're here for a confirmation of pregnancy, am I correct?" She was typing up what was written in the forms, before placing them in a filing cabinet next to her. I nodded when she looked at me.

"Okay, I'll get you to lay down on the bed, I'm going to feel around your abdomen, then we're going to do a trans-vaginal ultrasound, where the ultrasound is submitted orally in your vagina." She said, still speaking softly. But that didn't stop me from panicking, she has to put what, where?

I laid on the bed, and she prodded and poked around my lower stomach for a while, then picked up a scary want looking thing. She placed what looked like a condom on it, after disinfecting it, and placed some weird looking liquid on it.

"This might feel a little uncomfortable, but I'll need you to put your knees in the stirrups, and take big deep slow breaths in and out for me." I stared at the wall, and before I knew it, she was printing out sonograms for me, and explaining my baby was perfectly healthy. I didn't want to look at the pictures just yet.

She let me clean up, and threw away the items. Then we sat back at her desk.

"Now Isabella, we just need you to get some blood tests, which you'll need to go to the hospital to get done, but we can get the results can be sent back here. I will also get you to start taking prenatal vitamins, which I will get you a script for." She smiled at me, before continuing. "Now we also need to discuss your options, I am guessing?"

"Uh yeah, I don't know what to do." I whispered, looking at my hands in my lap.

"Well, there are always three options, and you'll need to think hard before you really decide about it, because it's going to be a difficult decision, no matter the age." She spoke. She wrapped things up, explaining a few more things – like symptoms I may or may not get as the pregnancy goes a long, gave me my script, and a form with my referral for the blood test.

Walking out, I stopped at the reception to make another appointment with Dr. Taylor, then headed home, stopping at the store, to get stuff for dinner. I need to think about how I am going to break the news to Charlie, so why not make dinner for him and tell him then? Whilst I was at the store, I noticed I couldn't help but notice how all things to do with pregnancy and children seemed to jump out at me. My mind was racing so fast. I didn't know what to do.

But first things first, I need to talk to Charlie. I got all the ingredients to make spaghetti Bolognese, with cheesy sauce, paid and then headed home. It only took me five minutes to get home from the store.

As soon as I got home, I started on making dinner, making sure I put it in the warmer once it was done, then set about to do some cleaning and laundry around the house, so that it was clean, and hopefully Charlie will be in a good mood when he gets home.

"Bells, you home?" I heard Charlie yell out from downstairs. I looked up at the wall clock in the bathroom, and finished up cleaning before heading downstairs.

"Hey Bells," Charlie spoke when he saw me, he was hanging up his jacket. "Dinner smells delicious, I'm famished. Early dinner then?" He asked.

"Sure." I replied, giving him the best smile I could muster up. We walked into the dining area, and I placed a plate of food in front of Charlie, then one for myself.

"Wow, you really cleaned this place up, didn't you, thankyou Bells." Charlie spoke, a smile on his face as he nodded in approval.

"Dad, I actually have something to talk to you about." I spoke, my voice strong. I figured I may as well get this over and done with, it was inevitable.

"Yes?" He replied shortly, apparent from the look at my face, he must of noticed the look on my face, because he suddenly had a look of worry on his face.

"uh… uh…" My breathing getting heavier. How could it be so hard to tell someone something.

"I'm two months. – " Paused to grab my breath.

"You're two months what Bells?" Charlie asked, gruffly.

"I'm two months pregnant." I said, a tear escaping down my face. I put my head in my hands, and let the tears go. This was way harder than I thought it'd be.

"Hmph. Okay." Was his reply. I looked up, and he was looking down at his plate of food, a frown evident on his face. He then looked up at me. "Sweetie, what happened? You're only sixteen, still in school, what are you going to do?" He asked worriedly. The tears just got a little faster.

"I don't know daddy, I don't know." I sobbed.

We finished dinner in silence, an occasional tear still escaping as I ate. I said a whisper of goodnight to Charlie, then went to bed early, exhausted emotionally and physically.

************

The next day, I woke up, and the realisation hit me that I needed to get a job. I wasn't sure if I could go back to school or not. Maybe I could go back to school once the baby was born, or do online courses? Get some money saved up, and get my own apartment for the baby and i?

Wait, what am I thinking, I haven't even decided on keeping the baby yet or not. I got ready, Charlie had already left for work, he usually gets up and leaves before I get up. He left a note in the kitchen giving me permission to take a sick day off of school, so I can have some time to think. So I decided, that no matter what I decide, I should still try and get part-time work, so I decided to I go over to the newtons book store, as they have a job opening.

When I walked through the sliding doors of the store, it made a buzzing noise, indicating that someone had entered the store. I walked straight to the counter where Mrs Newton was sorting out books.

"Bella, sweetie, you aren't at school? What can I do for you?" She asked, kindly.

"I'm taking a day off today, personal reasons. I was wondering if that job opening you had, was still on offer?" I replied, with my question.

"Oh, yes dear it is, just give me a minute, and we can discuss this. Why don't you go take a seat over in the reading area?" She spoke, her voice still kind. Five minutes of waiting, she came over and sat in front of me, with a book in her hand. "Okay honey, we'll get to the chase, why would you like this job?"

And the interview went on, with questions similar. I was as honest as I felt comfortable being. I knew I'd have to let her know sooner or later, but I just wasn't ready, and I didn't know what I wanted.

There is the first chapter updated, hopefully this time it'll be better than last. Enjoy. Second Chapter is currently being edited and will be up hopefully next week.