Name: Love is Concrete

Summary: Love, like truth and beauty, is concrete…. A glimpse at GSR through the seasons.

Rating: T

Disclaimer: You all know that I don't own CSI or anything having to do with it. The only reason that I'm writing this is so I don't get sued.

Chapter One- Default Chapter

Love, like truth and beauty, is concrete. Love is not fundamentally a sweet feeling; not, at heart, a matter of sentiment, attachment, or being "drawn toward." Love is active, effective, a matter of making reciprocal and mutually beneficial relation with one's friends and enemies.

Love creates righteousness, or justice, here on earth. To make love is to make justice. As advocates and activists for justice know, loving involves struggle, resistance, risk. People working today on behalf of women, blacks, lesbians and gay men, the aging, the poor in this country and elsewhere know that making justice is not a warm, fuzzy experience. I think also that sexual lovers and good friends know that the most compelling relationships demand hard work, patience, and a willingness to endure tensions and anxiety in creating mutually empowering bonds.

For this reason loving involves commitment. We are not automatic lovers of self, others, world, or God. Love does not just happen. We are not love machines, puppets on the strings of a deity called "love." Love is a choice -- not simply, or necessarily, a rational choice, but rather a willingness to be present to others without pretense or guile. Love is a conversion to humanity -- a willingness to participate with others in the healing of a broken world and broken lives. Love is the choice to experience life as a member of the human family, a partner in the dance of life, rather than as an alien in the world or as a deity above the world, aloof and apart from human flesh. – Carter Hayward

I don't know when and where I fell in love with Gil Grissom, but I do know that I fell before I had time to rationalize how I felt. As scary as it was for me, I'll never regret it. Even through all of the years, it was worth all of the pain and suffering, because for once in my life, I feel complete.

I first met Grissom at a seminar, way back when I was a student at Harvard. He was there to teach us about, what else, bugs. I can remember not being all that excited about going to a seminar on that day. I wasn't really in the mood to go anywhere, as much as I loved school and all of the learning that came with it. It was just one of those days where I felt like just sitting at home, lying around and doing absolutely nothing for a day. I was exhausted from studying for finals and just wanted a break. But somehow, I managed to convince myself that this was a once in a lifetime opportunity, even though it was just a boring seminar, and I could go to one any day.

I'll never forget how he first reacted to me. It was during the middle of the seminar. He was telling us about his line of work and how bugs helped him determine how long a person has been dead when our eyes had met. He had frozen for a couple of seconds and was just staring right into my eyes. That's when I had felt my face getting hot and red, and I felt my heart skip a beat.

We had talked for a while after the seminar, outside of the small auditorium. I had wanted to know more about his line of work and what he had to say. In the strangest way, he completely fascinated me. We sat outside on that small park bench for at least three hours before he had to leave. That's when he gave me his E-mail address and his phone number and said he would like to keep in touch. And so we did.

I don't believe in love at first sight, and I don't think that it was love at first sight with Grissom. Then again, I didn't believe in love itself for a very long time; so maybe love at first sight exists in this world too. I think with every word he said to me, every time he touched me, and every time he was just around me, the more I fell for him and the deeper I got into the thought of us together.

True love is not something easily forgettable. It can't just be erased. It is a complete war. Within the last year or so I've found out that true love can be a beautiful thing, but it can only exist if you are willing to fight for it. Some people are willing to go on, and fight the battles in this so called 'war' while others are not. Some people don't want to endure any of the pain that comes along with love, so they never are willing to fight for it. But, if you are one of the ones willing to fight, the rewards are worth every one of the risks you can take. Maybe that's why I decided to fight for us. Because I knew that eventually all of the pain would be forgotten and I'd be the happiest person on the face of this Earth.

And that's why I fought for us for six straight years. Six, long, and extremely painful years.

I always knew there was hope for Grissom and me. As much as he liked to deny it, there was real chemistry between the two of us. The sparks that we could create just between the two of us is insane. We could simply just be in the same room and there was already tension between the two of us.

Although getting Grissom took me quite a long time, it was worth the wait, because every night (or day considering we both work at night) I can come home to him and know that he still loves me.

And that is something that I know will never change.


A/N: Like? Don't like? Let me know, this is a WIP so there will be more!