Billy Mays was not the average man. After his career in selling cleaning supplies, he mysteriously disappeared, only to be drafted into the Scout Regiment in a top secret team to fight against the evil Titan threat. Trained as a soldier, he specializes in janitorial services, eliminating the threats of toxic chemicals that the Titans use in attack of the human race. Little does Billy know, the deadly secret his partner has that may threaten the lives of the entire human race…

Billy, with his partner, Vince Offer, were on their way to a shady steak restaurant in Wall Rose one monday morning to investigate a report of a Hairy Titan looming in the area. All they expect is just a simple clean-and-dream operation, but Vince has other plans. "Been a long time since we have met, right Vince?" Vince looks at him, silently. "Still have hard feelings from that last mission, huh? Alright, just remember when the cleaning foam turns white, you're ready to wipe." Vince silently agrees, as he grabs his carbonite fiber cleaning towels and loads them up into his launcher.

The pair arrives shortly afterward, and they unload their truck of supplies. "Alright" Billy exclaims, "Prepare yourself. I have heard reports of Theta level chemicals inside this building, and these are a sure sign of TITANS." Vince shudders at the thought of what happened last mission, and remembers what happened with project ShamWow. He tries to forget every day since then, but every time he is driven more and more to do something horrible. As they walk into the building, Vince has something he needs to say. "Billy? There is something I need to tell you."

`"What is it, Vince?"

"I have to say something very important about you. Its that I- OH CRAP TITANS!"

Suddenly, a naked 2 meter Titan jumps from one of the counters, attacking Vince with his human-like teeth. Billy grabs his jug of cleaning agent, and splashes it over the attacker's nape. It writhes in pain, and runs off into the kitchen, squealing in pain. "You ok, Vince?" Vince nods in agreement, as the pair shake off the random attack. As they make their way to the kitchen to finish the job, they discover something terrible just outside it. The Titans have already made their base. "Oh my gosh…" Vince gasps in shock "They are using Tide."

"TIDE?!" Billy screams, "But Tide is horrible! Oxiclean is the only bleach that cleans best!" Billy fills with rage, as he slams his fist onto the wall. He runs to his truck, grabs the bleach guns, and storms into the kitchen, with Vince following behind. Billy screams like a goat as he sprays down the kitchen, eliminating the Titan filth and obliterating the Titan's plan to release project tide into Wall Rose and Sina. He thinks that all of this is over when suddenly a Brown mass drops from the ceiling, and pounces onto Billy. "BILLY!" Vince screams, but it is too late. He is completely enveloped in the dark mass. Vince thinks quickly, and pulls out his last bottle of OxiClean. He shouts "IT'S NOT CLEAN, UNLESS IT'S OXICLEAN!" and showers Billy with the cleaning agent. The Beast Titan explodes into nothing as Billy breathes a deep breath, a sure sign that he has survived.

"Billy? Thank goodness you're okay!" The two hug each other, as they sigh in relief that they have survived another day in the dangerous job of Titan hunting. They clean the rest of the restaurant, put everything back into order, and go on their way back to the base. "Billy?" Vince asks, "There is something I need to tell you. The truth is… You're insane." Billy thinks for a moment, and says "How am I insane?"

"You think dirt and mold are Titans, so I think you are insane."

"What about the Titan that attacked both of us?"

"It was just a clump of dirt and mold."

"Oh."

Billy sits down in the truck, and thinks about his past experiences. "Did I really think they were Titans? Am I just insane?" Billy sighs, and takes a nap, thinking through Vince's comment. Little did Billy know, that Vince was actually working for the enemy just like Annie . He was secretly using tide in his gear instead of Oxiclean. Vince grins, and drives off into the distance, knowing that he has successfully fooled the great man known as Billy Mays, in his elaborate plot to bring down Oxiclean once and for all...