The Oedipus Wanna Be
Warning: It is essential that you are familiar with the tale of Oedipus if you wish to continue. It won't make sense otherwise. If you aren't and wish to read, the tale is available on Wikipedia, just type in 'Oedipus' and press search.
Disclaimer; The following belongs to Stephenie Meyer and the inhabitants of Ancient Greece.
It was just an ordinary afternoon at the Cullen residence. Carlisle was at work and Esme was drawing up plans for the renovations to take place on their next home. Jasper occupied himself in his study while Alice and Rosalie planned their next shopping trip. Edward played the piano with Bella by his side. Jacob was in the dining room helping his imprint with her homework. He shook his head in admiration, only five years old and already in high school. Still, that was sort of to be expected from a half vampire who learned to read when she was just a few months old. Only one member was left bored and alone.
'Hey Nessssie!' called Emmett from the living room.
'What!?' she returned, but made no move to join him. He pouted.
' I challenge you to dual! You. Me. Super Mario Brothers. Now'
'Ok!' It actually sounded like fun. Nessie moved to the other room with Jacob in tow. Edward stopped playing. 'What?' Nessie's eyes were wide an innocent.
'Don't you think you should finish your homework first Nessie? -and don't pretend you already have'
The girl in question rolled her eyes 'Please Dad. I'm almost done, I just have to summarize one of the Greek Tragedies for English class. I could do it off the top of my head if I had to, it'll take like, five minutes. Please.'
Edward glared. 'If it will only take five minutes, you might as well do it now Renes-'
All of a sudden both Edward and Alice snapped their heads toward Emmett who was looking at Nessie and Jacob with an evil glint in his eye. Edward shook his head and scowled in warning whilst Alice shook with laughter.
'Tell you what Nessie' Emmett began 'Hows about I give you a retelling of one of the tragedies and you can write your summary as we go?'
She groaned, but Emmett winked. 'Trust me, you haven't heard a tale like this before'
'Ok' she agreed reluctantly, and went to grab a pen and paper. Emmett sat down regally in a large arm chair while, at a signal from Alice, the others gathered to sit cross legged at his feet. Nessie sat at the very front, pen and paper in hand.
Emmet cleared his throat and began. 'This, is the story of The Oedipus Wanna Be'
*******************
'Once upon a time, there lived a young man who was the son of the Chief of a tribe on the west coast of America. Unfortunately, this young man was struck with a strange affliction, whenever he got angry he would begin to shake and transform into a wolf. During the transformation, he grew exceptionally larger and this would invariably cause his shoes to burst. Eventually, he ran out of shoes all together and had to go to school with bare feet.
In order to avoid suspicion, the boy's father wrote a note to the school saying that he was unable to wear shoes because he his feet were swollen as a result. He could walk fine, he just couldn't wear shoes. The teachers weren't happy, but they respected the Chief and allowed the boy to go bare foot without comment. The boys friends on the other hand, were not so forgiving. They teased him incessantly and gave him the name Oedipus meaning 'swollen foot' '
Jacob growled menacingly and began to shake. Jasper sent out a wave of calm to sooth him, but otherwise the werewolf's outburst went ignored.
'Now, young Oedipus expected his life to go along the same as any other werewolf's. Patrolling, learning to control outbursts, killing vampires and generally stinking, but fate had other ideas. For a long time, he had been in love with one of the Pale Faces; a young girl who lived in a settlement not far from his home. She hated to be called by her full name and so, for the purposes of this story, we will refer to her as 'Jo' (A/N: This is short for Jocasta, Oedipus's mother). Unable to tell her of his affliction, Oedipus believed that he would have to cease all contact with Jo. Jo, however, was a stubborn bad-ass and she wasn't putting up with that. She guessed his secret and the two became closer than ever. To our young hero it seemed that he fell more in love with her every moment they spent together.
Jo, however, was in love with another. His name was Laius and was under an affliction of his own. He thought his presence was a danger to Jo and so he had left her for her protection. In doing so, he left her heart shattered into tiny pieces. Oedipus did his best to repair it, and to be fair he was doing quite well until something went very, very, wrong.
Far away, a prophetess foresaw the death of Jo, moments before it ought to have happened, but Oedipus's affliction interfered with her sight and the vision was false. Unaware of this, the most beautiful angel in all of heaven hurried to inform Laius of the tragedy. Shocked and heartbroken he could not believe it and tried to make contact with his beloved and ascertain the truth. But the course of true love never did run smooth. Due to a mix up, Laius instead found himself speaking with Oedipus, who knew nothing of the prophecy. Ignorant as he was, he unwittingly confirmed the death of Jo - even as the girl stood before him. Laius was unable to bear his grief and took actions to end his life.
Fortunately the prophetess, realizing her mistake and its repercussions, hurried to warn Jo and together they managed to prevent the vampire's suicide. Laius was shocked to find his beloved alive and vowed to never leave her again. The two love birds were happy once more, but things weren't quite so great for Oedipus. He had lost his love and almost caused the death of Laius...
*********************
Emmett looked round at his family, all of whose mouths hung open with shock at the audacity of his retelling. Two faces stood out among the rest; Edward, who looked ashen with guilt; and Jacob, who looked like he was about to throttle Emmet. It was Bella, however, who broke the silence first.
'EMMETT! How could you!? How can you possibly be trying to blame Jacob for what happened!?'
Emmett's eyes were wide and innocent 'Who me, Bella? I haven't said a thing about Jacob, I'm just retelling the story of Oedipus. Sure, I've bent a few of the facts here and there, but that's just to make the story work...'
Bella looked like she would say more, but Jasper sent another wave of calm around the room while Edward placed a hand on her knee. Instead of continuing the argument, she sat back and grimaced, trying not to think about what part of the story was coming next...'
