A/N: This is a strange little one-shot about when Hermione Granger makes a big mistake and lets herself do something stupid. Not my typical kind of fic but it's interesting, I guess. I know I could probably have expanded this into an actual story but I don't think it would've turned out as well. I think Draco is much more in-character than Hermione, but let me know what you think. Oh! And this was inspired by the song 'Blood On Our Hands' by Death From Above 1979.

Disclaimer: I own a whole lot of nothing.

The First Mistake

Your name is Hermione Granger and you've done the unthinkable; the impossible; the unforgivable.

You've fallen in love with Draco Malfoy.

There is blood in all the things I say,
Will you hate me if I stay this way?

It was Saint Valentine's Day and you found yourself more alone than usual. All day long had been couple after couple, hug after hug, and kiss after kiss. You couldn't keep your eyes off of the love that was circulating throughout the school. You heard the bumps against all of the broom closets. You heard the locking of empty classrooms throughout the day. You heard the moans and sighs in the Prefect dorms. You told yourself that this happened every day, your acknowledgment of it was more acute only because of the significance of the day. But deep down, you knew better. You knew that everyone had seemed to find someone to share this Holiday with – that is, everyone except you (or at least that's what you thought).

As the day wore on, you found you couldn't take it. It was all so miserable; so depressing; so god damn pathetic. You found yourself in the Astronomy Tower at eight 'o' clock, dangling your feet over the ledge, trying to get your mind off of the days events. You closed your eyes, trying to remember who had hooked up today and why no one had approached you.

Was it the hair?

It didn't look that bad this year.

Was it the clothes?

You'd shortened the skirt a bit and left the top two buttons unbuttoned.

Was it the teeth?

They'd been fixed a few years ago.

Was it the personality?

It couldn't be that terrible. Could it?

"Thinking about jumping, Granger? Not that it would matter. Actually, it would be more of a victory. One less filthy Mudblood to worry about." A voice called out to you in the dark, forcing your eyes to open and your body flinch. It was a voice you'd grown used to over the past seven years. That cold, merciless, and hate-filled voice that you recognized as Draco Malfoy's.

"Interesting choice of words, Malfoy. One less filthy Mudblood to worry about." You quoted, pronouncing every word with meaning. Letting the statement hang in the air, you lifted your legs from the edge and turned to face him, still sitting. "Worrying over a poor, pathetic, filthy little Mudblood like me, are you? Scared that despite my unclean blood I'm more capable of magic than you?"

"No, actually, more like worried that my pure blood might become tarnished by yours." It seemed as though your words had not affected him, but had you been closer and had it not been so dark, you would've seen the blood rush to his cheeks and you would've known that what you'd said had been true.

"Whatever you say, Malfoy. Why aren't you off having an orgy with a bunch of pitiful third years?"

"What makes you think that's not what I was about to go do?" You could practically hear the smirk in his voice and see his eyebrows rise. Now it was your turn for your cheeks to flush as you realized you had no comment. "Why aren't you off getting deflowered by Potty or Weasel… or both if that's what little Granger is into." You couldn't help your next retort. It came flying out of your mouth like a curse.

"And what makes you think that I haven't been deflowered?" You smiled in the dark, hoping – praying – that you'd stumped him. But you knew you had not when he came close enough to you so that you could see him clearly; so that he could touch you.

"Because, Mudblood, I can see it in your eyes." His fingers found their way to each side of your eyes. "I can see the way you watch Potter, hoping he'd give you your first kiss." His fingers traveled lightly down your cheeks and his thumbs rested on your lower lip. "I can see the drops of sweat that gather on your forehead and roll all the way down your skin to your neck whenever Potter puts his hands on you." His fingers moved slowly down your jaw, past your throat, and then came to rest right under your neck. "And I can feel the way your heart is racing, but I'm not quite sure if it's because of Potter – " he spread his hands and ran them over your shoulders, down your arms, took a gentle hold on your wrists, and finally brought his eyes up to meet yours, "or me."

"You're disgusting, Malfoy." You managed to whisper with what you hoped was venom.

"Am I? Because right now, I'd say you find me to be anything but." His face hovered inches from yours and you hoped yours was remaining still enough so you wouldn't touch.

"Well, you're wrong." Your voice was strangled but you were trying so hard to sound sure of yourself.

"Prove it." You groaned mentally. Not at how childish of a thing it was to say but at the fact that you knew he'd never let you go if you didn't 'prove it.' You'd finally found a normal enough voice to sound like you weren't nervous.

"You can't be serious." You knew your voice sounded outraged – you were!

"Does it look like I'm kidding?"

"Fine." You tilted your face slightly, stood on your tip toes, and you let him be your first kiss. Your lips were shut firmly, not sure what to do, when you felt him respond. His lips opened only slightly and trapped your bottom lip between both of his. Your eyes opened for a second before fluttering shut again.

This is what you'd been missing, not just today, but for the last 17 years of your life.

His lips opened again and so did yours and suddenly his tongue was inside of your mouth, tangling with yours and trying to get you even closer.

From the way his hands were clutching at you and the way you were doing the same to him, you knew it was time to stop.

"There. I'd better be going." You stepped away, wiped your mouth, and looked him dead in the eye. "After all, you have an orgy to get to, right?" You stepped around him and walked quickly back to the Prefect dorms.

You're a woman; we both know it's true,
By the things that I've done to you.

One week after Valentine's Day (which you'd figured hadn't been so bad), you found yourself being pulled into an empty classroom. You struggled and squirmed right up until you opened your eyes to see one Draco Malfoy peering at you.

"Malfoy? What the hell?" You looked around, expecting to be caught in some kind of Death Eater trap but realized you were entirely alone in the room.

"I know that was your first kiss on Valentine's Day." He smirked at you before turning his back and walking towards a shelf of books.

"What makes you so sure? Was it not up to your standards?" You spoke lightly, trying so hard not to give yourself away.

"Oh no, you were surprisingly up to my standards." He shrugged and pulled a book off of the shelf, as if he pulled girls into classrooms all of the time. "It's just that…" he snapped the book shut and turned to face you, "you were so bloody focused. Like you were writing an essay for Snape! Not that I didn't appreciate such intensity, it's just that most girls – most experienced girls - are thinking about what's coming up next instead of what's going on right then."

"Well, maybe I just like making the most of every little thing that I do. And, honestly, what makes you think that I would have let you be my first kiss?" You laughed, hoping that you were covering everything up.

"Granger, I know I was your first kiss. And now that you've shown me just how focused you are on what you do with that muddy little tongue of yours, I intend to be your first fuck, too." Your eyes were wide as he spoke of losing your virginity so crudely.

"If you think you're going to rape me, Malfoy, you've got another thing coming." You mustered all of the courage you had inside of you and spoke harshly.

"Innocent, little Mudblood. I would never rape you. You'll be begging for me, right before I take you." He almost smiled and you realized that it was a beautiful but menacing smile.

"Go to hell, Malfoy. You're insane if you think I'd ever beg anything of you. And why would you want anything to do with me?

"Because I want to be Mudblood Granger's first. I want you to remember your first time. Remember how bad you wanted it. Remember how good I was. Remember that you slept with the enemy." And then he was kissing you for the second time. Kissing you like you'd always wanted to be kissed. While your lips moved together, his hands worked on getting your skirt off, and you fumbled with the buttons of his shirt.

Not too long after, you were both stripped down to your undergarments, grabbing at each other and trying to become one person rather than two.

You knew you shouldn't be doing it. You knew that it was only going to lead to trouble. You could already feel Draco Malfoy growing on you when you knew that he wasn't a good person. You knew it was a bad, bad idea.

Just as your knickers were being pulled down, you pushed his hands away and told him to stop. You weren't sure if it was a good idea or not. You knew that at that moment, you weren't in control of your own actions.

He shrugged, pulled his clothes on, and made his way towards the door.

"Later, Mudblood." He threw over his shoulder and walked into the corridor.

You realized then that you'd made your bed and you had to sleep in it… alongside your worst enemy.

There is blood in all the things you say,
I won't hate you if you go away.

A week after you almost went all the way with Draco Malfoy, you found yourself knocking on the door to his room.

"Had a feeling you'd be coming around here sometime this week." He opened the door and let you in. You walked to the bed (wrong move number one) and slid your fingers across the comforter slowly (wrong move number two) before he was turning you around and pushing you down.

"Malfoy, I came here to talk not to… you know." You moved your head to the side so you wouldn't have to look him in the eye.

"I doubt that." He replied and you knew he wouldn't let you talk. After a while, you found yourself in the same position (no pun intended) as last week.

And you let him finish what he'd started. Draco Malfoy had indeed grown on you. His witty remarks, his stubbornness, and his sexual appeal had had a huge impact on you in a way you knew it shouldn't have.

You had yet to say his name during your escapades. You'd stuck to murmuring noises and whimpering – refusing to let him win you over.

Once you were both naked, he looked at you, waiting for you to say it. "Malfoy. I need you… I need you inside of me." He smirked at you. He'd won.

He pushed into you without so much as making sure you were ready. Tears streamed down your face as you gave yourself to the Slytherin pushing inside you and pulling out of you. Finally, you fell into the rhythm and rocked your hips against his while he groaned and said short sentences.

"So… close…" he gritted out while you were panting. You were close too. You were falling over the edge. You were falling in love.

You came with a long and loud "Draco!" While he came with a harsh and loud "Mudblood!" Your eyes snapped open and your movement stopped. He'd called you Mudblood after you'd dared to call him Draco. Wordlessly, you slid out from under him and put your clothes back on.

You left… but came back the following night. And the night after that. And the night after that. And every night, after every time you gave your body and more of your heart willingly to Draco Malfoy, you came with a "Draco!" and he came with a "Mudblood!"

Finally, one night you decided to confront him.

"Why do you call me Mudblood when we have sex?" You asked him while you put your clothes on.

"Because that's what you are. You're a filthy Mudblood who's a good lay." You gaped at him, unable to believe the words that had just come out of his mouth.

"How… how can you say something like that? After every-"

He cut you off. "After everytime we fuck? Granger, just because we've been sleeping together doesn't mean I care about you."

"You're a bastard, Draco." tears welled up in your eyes as you suddenly came to terms that you'd made the biggest mistake of your life.

"Why do you keep calling me Draco? Don't tell me you thought this was a relationship!" He yelled and laughed cruelly. At the sight of tears streaming down your face, he composed himself and stopped laughing. "Look, I'm not a nice person. I'm sorry I got you into this but it's not like you could ever…" he trailed off, as if the word was a disease to him.

"Love you?" You looked up at him, your eyes clearly telling him that you could love him.

"You should go." And not come back, you finished for him. You nodded and left his room.

I am leaving while you turn away,
In the basement is where I'm going to stay.

As you walked back to the site where you had had your first kiss, you reflected on your non-relationship with Draco Malfoy.

On Valentine's Day, you'd been so eager to give your heart away, you forgot to stop and make sure that the recipient wanted your heart to begin with.