{YOU MUST READ THE REST OF THE PARTS IN ORDER TO GET THE FULL EMOIONAL AFFECT OF THIS PART!}
{WARNING: I know the other chapters have been angsty, but still maintained fluff. I will warn that there is a [not smut] harder, bit darker scene. I know there are young readers, so read at your own discretion}
A/N: Heyo! So part 4 is here, and I'm lo key scared for you to read it bc you're probably gonna hate us... but oh *insert whale emoji here* it happened, and I can't do anything about it. Don't forget to leave a review after you read, because honestly, reading your feedback gives me lyfe. Another author's note at the end, so be sure to read that
ROLES:
John Laurens (bold) — IG handle : (at sign) _ever_yours_turtle_
Peggy Schuyler (italic) — IG handle : (at sign) a . dot .ham_ilton (Me) {WITHOUT THE SPACES IN BETWEEN BC FANFICTION WON'T LET MY TYPE IT WHOOPS
John raced home one day with excitement. Holding his hat firm to his head as the wind threatens to blow it away. As the last few weeks have unfolded, John has realized a few true things. 1) Life brings bright gifts that easily make everything that seems wrong right. 2) Once you fall in love, it is hard to find negative things that can damper your happiness. 3) You can fall in love as many times as you can take a breath. Anyways, Peggy seemed to settle well in New York again, even in his small home. She really knew how to make a place bright, but the best thing about having Peggy as his own... She made him so happy. He lived everyday with a smile on his face and he didn't think it possible for it to fade. He ran to his front door with ungodly swiftness, just wishing to see her face. He pushed through the door. "Peggy?!" He calls with a bright smile
Peggy didn't think adjusting to her new life would be so easy. Sure, there are the little hiccups along the way, but the good outshines the bad by a long shot. She never thought that being with one person so often could make you love them more. Everyday, she's learned little things about John that makes her feel like she's falling in love with him over and over again. She remembers telling him that he 'would be so good to me', and she's not surprised to see how true that statement was. He treats her like his princess, and she's never loved a title as much as 'wife'. Hearing him come home, she drops what she's doing to greet him and give him a kiss.
John holds her close to him. Holding her cheeks, smiling through the kiss. Pulling away after a long while. "Wow." He says with an even brighter smile
She always melts in his arms, something that always makes her feel safe, "Wow what?"
"You are amazing!" He answers confidently
"So you say everyday" she laughs, rolling her eyes slightly at her over-flattering husband, "You're early today, I haven't started dinner yet"
"Then I get to help! Maybe that's why I raced home... also..." He pulls a small bouquet of red roses. "I got you these, because... I love you, and I don't need a reason." He chuckles
"You enjoy spoiling me way too much, I'm afraid" still laughing, she accepts the bouquet. "I have no plan on what we're having tonight so we're gonna improvise"
"I have the honor to be your obedient servant." He bows. "I'll hang on your every whim and word for the night. All hail the dinner queen!" He laughs, kissing her cheek
Peggy facepalms, "Oh my Lord, what did I get myself into when I agreed to elope with you?" She teases, opening the pantry, "Pizza?"
"H-hey!" He calls after her as she walks away. "That wasn't nice..." He follows her. John nods happily like a little boy, leaning his head on her shoulders, wrapping his hands around her waist. "Sounds lovely baby..."He whispers in her ear as he kisses down her neck.
"I'm sorry," she turns her head to kiss him, "Does that make up for it?" Her hands go to his arms wrapped around her middle and coughs, "You. Get vegetables."
"Of course, m'lady." He marches to the ice box and opens it. Staring inside. "I got a tomato and um... a pepper!" He shouts happily. "these are going to be the best pizzas ever!" He says
Peggy assembles ingredients whilst talking, "I'm thinking we're gonna need to swing by your family's place sometime these next couple days..."
"Any other reason than the growing infatuation my siblings seem to have for you?" He asks, peaking up at her from the cabinet under the sink.
"Infatuation? I wouldn't go so far to say that" she laughs, subtly avoiding his question. "I'm sure the newness of the fact that you got yourself hitched will wear off
"Uh... I think they were just sad they weren't involved very much..." He notes, fiddling with utensils. "Or at all..."
Peggy sighs, "I know, I am too... Are you— are you sorry that we didn't wait? At least so they could've known about it beforehand?"
"No, as much as I love them, it wasn't their marriage. It was the best decision at the time, and I don't regret it." He looked at her with stormy eyes
"Hey..." She rubs her hand on his back, "There are several things I regret in my life... Marrying you as the first thing I did back in the city isn't one of them"
He gives her a small smile then returns to his work before his eyes trail to the dough. They light up as he turned to her. "Can I twirl it?!" He asked excitedly
His childlike excitement never fails to charm her, "Have at it, /don't/ drop it!" She hands the dough ball over to him
He stares at it the dough mound happily before he began his work. twirling it with surprising precision. Doing well... until he looked over and caught a glimpse of Peggy as the sunset caught her eyes and hair delinquently. He gawked and uh... got distracted. He tossed the dough to high and it got... stuck to the ceiling.
Instead of getting upset, she doubles over in laughter, tears in the corners of her eyes from the fits if giggles that overcome her
John blushes as he stares up at the floury, sticky mess coating the roof. "Damn." He mutters
Composing herself a bit, she gasps out, "It's fine John really, making more is no problem" her laughter still not fully subdued, she starts preparing it again
"Making more..." He grumbles. Turning to her. "I am so sorry, you gave me one rule."
Peggy smirks, "Since you said sorry so nicely, I'll forgive you" she boops his nose, leaving flour on his nose, "Whoopsies" she tries to keep herself from laughing again
"Hey!" He calls, grabbing a hand full of flour and letting it loose on her face and hair
Her face is priceless when she grabs her own fistful and rubs it into his curls, "Two can play at this game, Laurens"
"Right back at you, Laurens!" He does something rather humiliating. Patting her rear and leaving a floury hand print there. He absolutely lost it. Laughing loudly.
She comes up behind him runs her fingers through his hair, leaving powdery streaks all throughout it. "Laurens vs. Laurens" she shouts gleefully
The two continued the flour fight of the century. He even picked her up at some point and they both crumbled to the floor, laughing and out of breath. He ran his hand through his hair, Staring at her. "Pegs?" He asked
"Hmm?" She smiles at him
"I love you."
"I love you too" she quickly kisses his nose, "C'mon, we need to make dinner... After all, I'm eating for 2 now." She hoists herself off of the floor and brushes herself off, a careful eye on John
John thinks on that for a moment "W-wha-..." The failed pizza dough landed promptly on John's head
Peggy laughs, but bites her bottom lip nervously, waiting for John to react to what she'd just said
John parts the dough from his face. Staring up at her, flour coating his entire existence. He put his hand on the cabinet and forced himself up shakily. "A-are you... are you serious?" He asks, inquiry in his eyes.
Peggy nods timidly, "A-are you, pleased..?" Her hands start wringing a dishtowel she was holding
"Pleased..." He whispered before his body became overwhelmed with happiness. "Peggy, try ecstatic!" He exclaims, grabbing her and pulling her to him. Tears in his eyes. "I love you..." He whispers
She hugs him tight, "I love you so much" she starts crying, pent up emotion pouring out
"How long have you known?" He asks
Peggy smiles, "A month or so"
"Peggy..." His breathing hadn't tamed and his tears were slow and silent. "I love you, Peggy." He whispers
"I love you too..." Her arms are clinging to around his neck, her head resting on his shoulder, "Y-you're going to be a father, John. We're going to be parents!"
He nods. Feeling anxious nature bubble in his gut but he ignored it the best he could. He just held her, both flour covered, in the middle of the kitchen. "T-thank you... You kept your promise and then some." He says happily, ever slightly dancing and swaying
Peggy lets out a sigh, "Thank /you/..." She looks up at him, and laughs, remembering the pizza dough. "You're gonna need to get that off"
John rolled his eyes, a smile on his face. "I've been a little busy." He kisses her cheek, then he begins to pull dough from his hair. "This is going to take restitution." He grumbles
Peggy smirks, "You're the one who had to get all fancy and impressive with it" she starts picking at the sticky mess in his hair as well.
"You caught me." He shrugged. "I Was trying to impress and woo you with my superb pizza twirling ability."
Shaking her head at him, "What am I gonna do with you?" She how back to what they had originally sought to do, and completed the pizza, placing it in the oven. "Go take a shower while I clean this mess up"
"I can't just let you clean this all up. It's almost entirely my fault."
Peggy pretends to look worried, "I'm afraid of you do, we'll end up with an even bigger less than we have already..." She muses
John rolls his eyes at her. "I can't even make a pizza..." He grumbles
She kisses him, "You can do many things, John Laurens. Cooking, isn't one of them... I love you anyways though"
"I can cook! I was just distracted is all..."He murmurs
"/Go/" she shoos him off, "I need to think, anyways"
"About?" He looks at her with concern, planting his feet.
Peggy shrugs, "About all of this" She waves her hand vaguely, "pregnancy isn't easy" she chuckles
"I-I know... I am right here." He grabs her hand with a simple flour covered smile. "I will be right here every step."
She smiles cheekily, "Dear God you better be! I did this for you, you know"
"What?! Don't tell me it was /all/ just for me." His face displays an elfish smirk, but his eyes are young.
"In a sense, it was... at least at first" Peggy shrugs, "I never thought I'd she want kids. But now?" She places a hand on her belly, "I have a human inside of me, growing, and I couldn't be happier" she whispers into his ear.
John can't help but blush and his simple smile falters slightly. "Are you scared?" He whispers
"Scared out of my senses" Peggy admits honestly
"Pegs..." He starts, meeting her eyes and lightly pressing his hand to hers on her stomach. "I love you." He repeated
She looks at him with tears in her eyes, "I love you too" kissing him full on the mouth
He kisses her back, holding the back of her head. Rubbing the nape of her neck tenderly. "I just wish..." He mutters against her lips. "I wish you weren't scared."
"Aren't you?" She inquires, "we'll be responsible for a child" she whispers, "What if I'm not a good mother?"
"He put his hand over her lips lightly to silence her. "That's nonsense. We'll be great parents. As long as we love the kid and are here for it. You will be a great mom." He assured again
Peggy smiles at her husband fondly, "What have I possibly done to deserve you?"
"I ask myself the same thing, every time I stare into your eyes." He spouts the cheesy line quite plainly, but his voice and face displayed admiration
Hugging him tight before letting go, she claps her hands, "Okay, you go wash your hair and I'll clean up"
"O-ok..." he says hesitantly before he turns around. "You sure you don't need help?" He asks
She throws her hands up in exasperation, "John! I promise I'm fine. Besides, once this baby comes, I'm not going to let you leave me alone"
"Great! Looking forward to it!" He sticks his tongue out and stomps down the hall. An ever pleasant grin on his face
She shakes her head behind him, and starts the task of de-flouring her kitchen. After a solid half hour she deems it presentable. The pizza already done, she waits for John.
John walked out of their room. Holding a towel to his damp head. He stares at her. "You wanna go get yourself cleaned up?" He asked, cocking his head
She smirks, "Why? Don't you like me covered head to toe with flour?" Her eyes sparking with happiness still
"I like you any way, but it's sticky and gross for me. You could make bread in my hair right now." He pulls a little flour from his curls
She examines his hair, "Did you know, that if you mix flour and water, it makes glue?"
He stares at her, then grumbles. As he returns back to the bathroom with a gloomy spirit and pasted hair.
She sighs and follows him into the bathroom, grabbing a fine toothed comb, she stands behind him and starts working on his head
"See look..." He grumbles. "You're already mothering me." He puts his head in his hands
Peggy shrugs, "If you don't want my help, fine" she stays in the bathroom and takes her shower instead
John tries with no luck to remove the sticky flour. He sighed. "I might just... Cut off all my hair." He laughs
"Don't you dare!" Peggy shouts
"And why not?" He says loudly, Reaching for some shears jokingly.
"JOHN LAURENS I SWEAR IF YOU CUT YOUR HAIR"
"Come and stop me!" He laughed, forcing it to be slightly evil.
"IF YOU DO SOMETHING WITHIN THE NEXT 5 MINUTES" Peggy threatens
"Try me!" He snips the scissors loudly, making echoing noise
She squeals, "PUT THE SCISSORS DOWN"
"Make me!" He laughs warmheartedly
A moment later Peggy flies at him, and jumps on his back "NO HAIR CUTS FOR YOU"
"Hey! I have scissors!" He drops them and holds onto her. Getting his back soaked in water
"Not anyMORE!"
John held her legs, standing still "I just wanted ta' change it up a little..."
"Not by yourself you're not." She links legs around his stomach. "If you're serious about it, at least have me do it"
"No! Not my curls!" He shrieks. putting a hand in his floury hair
"HA! I KNEW YOU WOULDN'T DO IT!" She exclaims triumphantly
"I just wanted you to come out." He laughs
"Oh my God" she laughs shaking her head. Her own wet curls spraying him
"Hey Doggo! Tame the mane!" He wipes his face with his hand
She stops, and hops down from his back, picking up the comb from earlier, tackling her hair
John stares at her. Smiling to himself as he blushes quietly. Thinking to himself.
TIME SKIP TO 6 MONTHS LATER
John's hands were slipped over the steering wheel of the convertible he'd rented for a date night. He looked over at Peggy as her hair blew in the wind with her eyes closed and her hands rested gently on her stomach. John eased his hand over hers as his smile grew. They were six months in, and while it wasn't always a dream. Peggy, in John's opinion, was already an amazing mother. He stared out at the road before he took a turn onto a lonely dirt road
Peggy's dozing off while John drives, lately she's been feeling a lot sleepier than usual. Feeling John's hand she opens her eyes and yawns, "Did I fall asleep again?"
"Yeah Pegs" He soothes. "You ok? You feeling ok, or are you just tired?" He asks quietly as trees and sun pour into their path
Peggy smiles at John, sleep still making her foggy, "I'm feeling good, just have been really tired lately," she frowns slightly
"That's ok" He brushes some hair from her face with the back of his hand. "Is there anything I can do? You can go back to sleep if it would help?" He offers with a sad smile
No, no, I'm awake now," she wiggles her way back up into a straighter position, "Where are we going, again?"
"It's a surprise." He says happily, rubbing her back slowly.
"Oh is that so?"
"Yeah, just be prepared to spend the rest of the night with me." He smiles. "I haven't been off work very much and sometimes I am going to fast for you... this is my way to poorly make up for it." He says sadly. Before he shook his head and came back. "I just hope we can have fun for a little... and hopefully relax."
"#1, I'm always ready to spend the night with you" Peggy smirks slightly, "and #2, you don't have to make up for anything. You've been busy, so have I... I hope so too, though, it'll be nice"
He puts his hand on her leg, rather relaxed. He sighs. "I just don't think it right... That I don't spend all the time with you I can... Pegs?" He asks this sheepishly, staring at her.
"What?" She looks at him, "You don't need to feel obligated to be by my side 24/7... you need a chance you breath, too"
"N-no, it's not about getting a breath. I don't need a breath away from you... but work has been going really well and, um... They offered me a promotion, but it means I can't be c-close... I will be gone a lot." He feels like a small kitten in this moment. getting reprimanded for something he didn't mean to do.
"Oh my gosh, you did! Congratulations, I'm so happy for you!" Peggy beams, proud of her husband
"I can't take it..." He says grimly, looking away.
"W-why not?" She wrinkles her nose, "You've worked so hard, and deserve it"
"Am I living if I miss my life?" He states the blatant confusing statement. "I mean, I want to be with my family, and you..." He grabs her hand. "I can't be a good father if I am not there." He says
"I think... I think this is a decision you need to make on your own. I'd feel terrible of the reason you missed an opportunity was because I said for you not to take it."
He watches her, a small smile on his face as he caresses her cheek. "What did I do? What could I possibly have done to deserve you?" He says
Peggy smiles at the familiar words, "I ask myself every morning when I wake up" pressing his hand to her check for a moment she lets go, "Eyes on the road, Mister Laurens"
"I get it, I get it. I am just mesmerized. The view is irresistible..." He watches her from the corner of her eyes
"I highly doubt I'm mesmerizing right now" she rolls her eyes, scowling slightly looking down at her ballooned stomach.
"What?!"He asked alarmed. "I outta... Hm, I outta... do something. You are beautiful!" He shouts.
"You outta do something?" She arches an eyebrow, "It's the truth..."
"I really don't want to debate with you, you are just wrong. I don't care about the circumference of your stomach. I love you, and that doesn't change with physical change. In fact, there is nothing you could change to make me believe you aren't the most beautiful creature on the face of the Earth." He made the last turn, driving up a steep hill.
"Okay, fine, I won't argue with you" she fake pouts. "You're too good for me, you know that right? You spoil me!"
"I only give you everything I can and everything I am. How is that spoiling?!" He gawks, parking the car and facing her
Peggy looks at him, "/That/ is spoiled" she kisses him, pressing his hand against her stomach
John smiles happily as the two kiss passionately for a few long moments before he pulls away and crosses his arms, facing the other direction. "Do you want me to leave?" He asks. "B-because, I don't think I can..."
"Of course I don't want you to leave" she says quietly. "I want what you want.. whether it be farther away, so be it"
"That hardly seems fair... considering..." He just grumbles, frustrated. "Damn." He mumbles. Pulling his hair back tightly with his hand so it's out of his face.
"What?" She asks him, troubled
"I can't just leave!" He falls back in exasperation. "But... I'd maybe give you and our family something close to the life you deserve..." He notes, holding his chin and staring off into the distance
"John, there is no 'life we deserve'," Peggy says firmly, "If I had my way, if lock you up in our home, never for you to leave. But if I did that, all you'd want is to get out. I'm just going to out you in a position where you feel like you need to escape." She says softly
"Well... Hm..." John sighs. "Let's put a pin in this, I want you to enjoy yourself tonight. At least." He smiles halfheartedly
"Okay" she agrees, ready for whatever John drove here for. "Where are we?"
"The closest I can get to the country..." He offers, undoing his belt. "One time, I was missing... I guess this" He gestures around them. "And Alex brought me here. This place became my oasis of happiness. There was always some adventure to find... I only hope that's still true." He laughs softly, holding her hand
Peggy smiles, looking and feeling relaxed for the first time in quite a while, "I want to see your oasis of happiness" she takes his hand briefly, before getting herself out of the car. Steadying herself. She always felt a little off, after sitting for too long then standing, these days
John got out of his car quickly. practically running to her side. He held her steady, staring at her. "You okay, Pegs?"
Peggy shakes her head to orient herself, "Yeah, I'm fine" she smiles at him, "Don't worry"
"I am worrier." He concludes, brushing off her shoulders as he turned back to the car and grabbed a picnic basket. He turned around and watched her for a moment. happily humming as he offered her an arm.
"I know" she takes his arm, "One of the many things I love about you"
"Seriously?" He asks. "I find it a heavy inconvenience." He shrugs, leading her to a place only unknown to her.
She kisses his cheek, "At least you care"
"Of course I care." He says with a cheesy grin
"I love you" she's looking around as they're walking, nodding towards the basket, "What'd you pack to eat?"
"Sandwiches..." He says, focused on clearing a path for her. "Times like these I wish I had a donkey rather than be one." He says dryly.
Peggy swats his arm playfully, "You're not a donkey"
"Am toooo." He says back with equally playful nature
"A rather adorable donkey then"
"But a donkey never the less..." He clears the last branch to make way for a shady tree and a small pond. The place was rather beautiful.
"You are many thing John Laurens, 'donkey' I not one of them" She laughs, and inhales a sharp intake of breath, "This could be a storybook setting"
"That's exactly what I said!" He laughs, slightly startling a small squirrel
She nods her head, still gazing in wonderment
"You wanna sit down, Pegs?" He asked after a long drawn out moment of silence.
She nods, carefully lowering herself on the ground, and tucking her legs beneath her
John stares down at her with wide eyes
She looks up at him, "What?"
"Sometimes, I forget ya know..." He woke from his trance and sat down by her side
Still confused, "Forget what?"
"Sometimes I forget how amazing life is... but it tends to remind me quickly after my brain laps." He notes, staring off at the water with an intense glare of focus
Peggy smiles, "We've been blessed with a very fortunate life" she says softly
"Sometimes... I wish life would speed up... and sometimes I want it to slow down... but right now, if nothing changed. I would be happy." He whispers, leaning over and staring at her.
"I know... For me, there are times when all I want is to get this baby out of me... but then there days like these when I'm so content with what's going on right now"
"I am sorry." He laughs halfheartedly. "I feel so selfish sometimes..." He says in a hum
Peggy places a hand on his back, "John?" she asks softly, "What's going on? You seem... off..."
"I am fine, honest." He assures. "I just don't think it's hardly fair to you..." He shrugs
"You don't think what's fair to me?" She prods gently
"It hurts you for us to have a family." He put it simply, "It just isn't fair."
"John, look at me" She waits until she has his full attention, "I may have been hesitant to try for a family, and I may complain about the pregnancy up until this baby is born. But hear me wen I say this. I've never been happier in my life. I'm so excited to be a mother."
John stares at her with big eyes. He nods stiffly. "Y-yeah... yeah ok." He tries to relax his shoulders and lean closer to her. He kissed her cheek and put his arm around her. Just trying to enjoy the still and the quiet for a little while.
Peggy sighs, still unsatisfied with his answer, yet doesn't want to force him to tell her what's going on in his mind
"What?" He asked noticing her questioning gaze
"Penny for your thoughts? I know you well enough to see that you're distracted today"
"A lot is happening..." He noted. "Can I ask you something?" He asked
"Of course"
"Would you consider moving?" He asks, likes it's been something heavy on his mind
Peggy looks at him, surprised, "I-I don't know..."
"I don't want you to hate me for it, but I don't think New York is a good place to raise a family— At least not where we are... We can't just stay in our apartment forever and it might mean I would get to work closer..." He stares off ahead of him, not daring to look over
She nods slowly, understanding what he's saying, "I don't hate you. I get it- I do... Where do you have in mind?"
"H-home... I want to go home." He says. "I want to go back to the South. I want to get away from the chaos of this place. I j-just don't want to because I know this is your home. This is what you like, this is where you grew up." He speaks quickly, like if saying it faster made it less real.
Peggy takes a breath, collecting her thoughts before speaking, "New York is where I grew up, yes. But it's not my home. Not anymore. I haven't talked to my family in almost over a year. There's nothing tying me down here. Only you. My home is wherever you are." She shrugs
John winces at the mention of her family, whom passively leave their disdain on their shoulders. Listening to her with focus and growing internally warm at her words. "Y-you really mean it?" He asked.
"I really do. I'm happy wherever you are. I trust you'll do what's best for our little family." Instinctively, she places her hands on her stomach.
John just shook his head, standing. He stared down at her with a devilish grin before he tore his shirt over his head and cannon balled into the pond suddenly. The splash hitting Peggy.
Peggy's about to argue further when she's hit by water, "John Laurens!" She yells, laughing
John doesn't come up out of the water.
She leans over the edge and waits for him to resurface
John jumps up and lands a wet kiss on her face. Splashing her with more water.
"John!" She sputters, trying to sound angry, but the smile on her face doesn't help her case much
"Come on in Pegs!" He laughs. Grabbing her hand, daring to pull her in.
"I can't!-" Peggy swivels her head in both directions, double checking they were alone. "Aw hell with it" She pulls the loose dress she was wearing over her head, tossing it to where John's shirt was, and dived in as well.
John caught her happily. Laughing. Pushing some wet hair from her face
Laughing, she shakes her head like a wet dog's. "You're lucky I love you enough to impromptu jump in a pond with you"
"I love you too!" He shouts happily. "What a coincidence."
"You're crazy!" she kisses him, still in his arms
He holds her, his soggy blue jeans tight around his legs as he stepped deeper in the water.
Peggy squeals, "How deep is this water, anyways?"
"I don't know, never cared to find out..." He noted as he stopped, staring into the murky pond.
"Yeah, well, I'm staying in the shallow end, thank you very much" She states, releasing herself from John's hold
John stares at the deep end with a smile. Then turns and follows her. "Hey Pegs?" He asks, trying to catch up.
"Hmm?" She turns around
"What are gonna name it?" He asks bluntly
"Our baby shall not be called /it/, I know that" she says pointedly at him
"S-sorry... I don't want to assume our sons gender..." He says jokingly
She rolls her eyes, "already planning for a son, eh?" Then serious, "I actually have been thinking about names though..."
"Like what?" He asks, tilting his head.
"If it were a boy... How would you feel about naming him after your brother?" She asks softly
His smile fades, his breathing catches. "I-I..." He feels both queasy and ecstatic all in the same. He swallows. All he can muster is a stiff nod.
Peggy looks at him sadly, going to him, "I know..." She whispers, hugging him
He holds onto her tightly, letting out a small whimper. Unable to say anything as he continued to nod aimlessly
"It'll get easier eventually... With time" her voice somewhat muffled because she was smooshed up against him
"How long? How many times do I have to say his name? How many times should I read Alex's signature? How many times can I stare at the damn pictures..." His forehead is pressed to her shoulder. His breathing heavy and sharp
Peggy wisely doesn't answer his rhetorical question, knowing there's no answer to it, instead she just holds him tight.
He dry heaves against her, taking shaking sobs.
"Shh... shh... it's okay" she talks soothingly into his ear.
He kissed her shoulder, her neck. "J-just don't leave me." He says
"I have no intention of it. You're stuck with me for life" she rests her head on the side of his
"I am being silly, hm?" He laughs between cries
She cracks a slight smile, "No, you're not"
"I know you will stay with me, yet I ask anyways... it's odd."
"And I know I couldn't have done anything nearly good enough to deserve you... And here we are"
"God... if I hadn't offered the struggling girl a seat... how different life would be..."
"In my defense, I would've gotten my stuff together... Eventually... " She jokes, "But really though, I can't imagine my life without you"
"Where would you be? I mean, I know you said you can't imagine it. But try."
"I-if I had never met you?"
"Yeah, where would you be?" He asks steadily, looking for answers in her eyes
Her face immediately becomes stormy, "I'd secluded, and scared, and untrusting to every man I met"
"What about that other man... didn't you trust him?" He asked
"We're going back to if I'd never met you. Having never met you, I would've stayed away from any guy..." She swallows a lump forming in her throat, "Especially somebody who wanted to get closer to me..." She says softly
"What was so different about me, Pegs? Some boy with messy hair helps you, I don't know, throw your trash away? What's to say you wouldn't have fallen in love with someone else?" He stares at her
"I-I don't know... You were just, different... Humble, when it wasn't obligated of you, and you didn't judge me for my past or who I was. You were a breath of fresh air when I needed it most. I'm not saying I definitely wouldn't have maybe fallen in love. But I remember that mindset so vividly sometimes..." She shakes her head, "I was in no position to be seeking romance"
"Pegs... I used to think I'd ruin your life." He says. "I used to think I was going to ruin your life." He said quietly
"Why...? How would you ruin it?"
"I didn't have money, I was reckless, I was a little kid with some odd phrasing. A few friends and a huge family..." he says. "You were a rich, beautiful, classy girl... how is the boy southerner supposed to make you happy." He thought for a moment. "It's almost like you gave up what you had to be with me..."
"And yet you defied the odds, and made me the happiest I've ever been in my life. I didn't give anything up, really... I just took a step back, and realized that it hurts more to not have you, than anything I thought I had before"
"Do you think our kid will have grandparents? I mean, of course, b-but... I need to... do you think I'll ever make up with your father?" He asks
Peggy sighs, "I-I don't want this to come out wrong, but I don't want our child to be anywhere near my father... Unless he has a complete life style change, he's never going to accept what happened. As much as I love my family, I-I just can't... At least for right now"
"He hates me... it's just hard to accept." He says heavily
She shrugs, "It's good thing you married me and not my family then"
"Right... lets go South." He says bluntly. "Away from all this craziness, away from all of it. My family is fine here now, over half of my siblings are adults and live alone. We get away from the judgement and everything... come on." He pleads slightly with a convincing grin
She nods, "Let's do it. Really. I want to."
Y-you do!" He says happily. "Let's go! Let's go now!" He says, practically dancing through the water
She laughs at her husband, "Not literally right /now/"
He grumbles "Araghhhhhh!" He moans, diving in the water.
She climbs out of the water, and sits on the bank since they're still alone. "John?"
John sat at the bottom in the mud. Not worrying about his oxygen currently.
Peggy kicks the water, waiting for him to resurface so he can hear her.
John only brings his eyes out of the water, staring at her and swimming around like a submarine.
She watches him swim around for a minute before asking, "How 'bout you? Where'd you be if you'd never met me?"
John jumps out, grabbing his shirt and rubbing his face before he placed it on top of Peggy's head so she can dry off slightly. He thought for a moment. "I wouldn't have gotten over you. I don't think I ever would."
Peggy uses his shirt to dry her face and hands as well, "You would've, I'm sure... But I meant if you'd never met me in the first place"
"Hmm..." he laughs. "It's a lot tougher than it looks, huh?" He stares at her. "My life would have folded out exactly like it did only with out the two year heartbreak... I wouldn't have switched jobs, Alex would still be gone, my house would be the same. Everything." He shrugged "just with out the very essence and love that makes me a human. You enable my life to have happiness again, Pegs."
She stares at John, just taking him in, then stands up, "Fate knew what it was doing I guess, huh?" She kisses him quickly, them throws her dress back on. "Hungry?"
John nods. Facing the sky with intensity in his eyes.
"What is it?"
"Thinking." He notes, running his hand through his hair
"Of what?" She comes up begin him, hugging him from behind, her chin resting in his shoulder.
He lay his hands over hers and couldn't help but grin. "W-what our kid will be like." He says
She smiles at him, "If this child shares a fraction of your smile, or a fragment of your mind, look out world that would be enough"
John smiled at her. "I just can't get how curly this kid's hair is gonna be out of my head." He laughs
"The curliest hair you ever did see" she agrees, twirling his curls around her finger
"It is my fault I suppose." He pulled at his own loose curls
"Have you /seen/ my hair?" Peggy laughs, her hair a tangled wet mess.
"My curls are tight." He says
"I know. I love them, and so do you"
"You can't prove that..."
Peggy give him a wicked grin, "Fine then. When we get home, I'll give you haircut..."
He puts his hand over her mouth. "Never speak that sentence without consent in my regard again." He says sternly
She sticks her tongue out under his hand, licking it. "Pregnant woman can't be accountable do their actions. They're not always in their right mind."
"Leave my curls out of your tyranny!"
She smirks, "See? You love your curls"
"Leave them alone..." he mutters
"Aww" she coos, "It's cute that you're protective of you hair"
"And what if I chopped off your... eye lashes! Or finger nails! It's the same." He puts his hand on his head firmly
"Oh my God..." Peggy slaps both hands over her mouth, trying to stifle her giggles
"These curls take time, honestly I bet you wouldn't be happy if I cut my hair." He crosses his arms
"I'm sure they do." She says with a straight face. "I would be devastated if you cut your curls off"
"We should eat. I am starving." He says
"Same" Peggy agrees, sitting back down and opening the basket
John wraps his arm around her. Watching her. "S-sorry it's not the best... I can't cook... you said that before."
"True, you're useless in the kitchen" she laughs, "But you have yet to ruin a sandwich, so I'm not too worried"
"I am worried..." He pulls his knees to his chest and watches her
She rolls her eyes, and takes out the sandwich, and bites into it dramatically, chewing slowly. "It's poisoned" she gags, trying not to laugh, clearly faking it
"Spit it out then!"
Peggy swallows it, and smiles at him, "John, I was joking. It's fine"
"Oh..." he notes, taking a bite and chewing slowly. "Remember when I tried to twirl pizza dough?"
Peggy laughs, "Yes, I most definitely remember. That was the day I told you about our child"
He smiled quietly, watching Peggy's stomach. His breathing sped up
TIME SKIP TO 1 MONTHS LATER
John unloaded the last of the plates and tossed the box to the side. "Pegs! I think we're done!" He called, the move had been long and strenuous on the two especially how far she was along now, but now it was finally done. He laughs along with her as she utterly glowed with radiant beauty. Her stomach kept him from holding her as close as he'd liked, but it was quiet alright as their baby grew. John grew more and more happy and excited
Peggy walks in with her hands on her back, "Thank God. Who would've thought that we could accumulate so much stuff in our little apartment in so little time?" She laughs, smiling at him, "Are you glad to be back to your home? Away from the chaos of the city..?"
"I am so... just so happy!" He spins her with a wide grin on his face
"Hey, hey! put me down!" Peggy squeals, "I'm glad though, this will be a great place to raise our family"
He looks around at the modern house. He had been saving to move anyways, now was the best possible time he could. "The nursery is how you like it to be?" He asked
She nods vigorously, "Yes, I love it!" She looks away, "I-I'm glad I'm able to give the South another chance..."
"Hey." He says, holding her hand and bringing it to his cheek. "I am right here. I am with you, and nothing bad will happen. We are together, that is enough." He says
She smiles faintly, "I know. I know. I'm just making mountain out of molehills. Just stress probably getting to me"
"Stress is bad for baby." He kisses her nose
"Baby causes stress" she jokes, then frowns slightly. "They say the next few weeks are going to be the longest one yet..."
"Hey, I told you. Right here. I am right here and I will be here to do everything I can for you. Say the word and" he snaps "it's done." He smiles
Peggy smiles warmly at him, "I know you are." Walking into their new kitchen, "By the way... we still haven't decided on any names"
John's breath catches as he stands still. He watches her, but quickly decides to turn away.
When he doesn't answer, she turns to as him looking away, head down. Sighing, she goes back to him, "Hey..."
"I just... I don't know if I can do that... I want.." he doesn't finish and doesn't look up.
She nods understandingly, holding her hand to his cheek, "I know. We can name this child whatever we want; whatever /you/ want. I don't want you to have to have sad memories when you look at our baby, or say their name."
"You can't just expect me to name our child on my own." He whispers.
"I don't expect that at all" she explains softly. "I want you to have as much an equal say in it as I do"
"What do you think about Alexander? Or Lexi? Something..." he swallows "like that."
She nods encouragingly, "I think its a wonderful way to let his legacy live on... to always remember the impact he had in you"
"I mean... my brother... I can't do that... and I can't do my parents. I like Alex." He nods "it's a nice ring
"There we have it then... Alexander for a boy, or Alexandra of its a girl." She hugs him
"You sure. You said equal input." He held her tightly
"100% sure. I never had the chance to meet him, and it gives me a type of solace for him thinking ill of me" she smiles faintly
Sadness rushed over John at the thought that his wife and best friend would never meet.
"I wish— Oh!" Peggy let's go of John and starts rummaging through boxes, "Now where did I pack them?" She mumbles
"What?" He asks, tilting his head
"The letters!" She exclaims, distracted still, pawing through their stuff
"Which ones?" He asks. "There are so many letters." He laughs
"My sister, Eliza. She— somehow my family for word that we were moving. She knew where our father kept all the letters you wrote me, and have them to me right before we left."
"What?!" He began to dig with her. Not being able to find them
"Everything was so crazy at the time, I put them somewhere, then forget about them until now" she opens up another box to see a bunch of papers hastily tied together in a stack, "Ah!"
"I-Is that them?" He asked, looking up from a box hesitantly
She wordlessly hands them to him
John runs his hand over each letter. Each one addressed the same way. He then handed them back. "These, are actually yours."
She takes them hesitantly, "I feel strange reading them when so much time has passed... A-are you sure...?"
"I know exactly what's in them... how about you read them in you ever question how much I love you. I might say one hundred times in each so." He smiles at the papers, still holding her hands
"My love in you is never in doubt" she looks at him in pure adoration. "I'd like to read them." She pulls her hands away from his, and sifts through the letters
"They are all just... lotta lovin." He sits on his knees, watching her
Reaching the oldest one, she unfolds the paper and starts reading. The time goes by in a blur. It's like she's inside John's head during the time span she'd lost hope of ever see I him again. They make her laugh, and cry, and get angry. God knows how much time has passed when she finally looks up at John, tears silently running down her face.
John had watched her, until she had read his farewell letter. He didn't have tears until then. He looked up when she did, tears in his eyes "crazy poor southern boy was pretty obsessed with that rich big city gal hm?" He laughed sadly
"I-I don't know what to say... I had no idea..." she's at a loss for words how powerful and emotionally compelling they were. "If I'd only gotten them- If I'd read them..."
"What? What would be different?" He asked. "I am satisfied right now, any change that would happen... it's not worth changing now." He says quietly, reaching out and holding her cheek
"You're right. All that matters is that we're together now" She agrees. "I-I'm just sorry... for all the pain I caused you"
"I wasn't in that mu-" one tear stained letter fell from the stack. "I mean uh!" He folded it and shoved it back in.
Peggy looks at him sadly, "The letters after Alex passed-" she shakes her head
John shakes his head. "I am sorry, I had no one else to talk to about it..."
She wraps her arms around his neck, pressing her forehead against his, "No. Don't ever apologize. I love you"
"I love you too..." he whispers. Kissing her softly
"John..." she starts slowly, not sure how to approach the topic
"What?" He asked sweetly, not noticing the edge in her voice at first
"We have to talk about our budgeting... We're going to have 3 mouths to feed" she hesitates slightly, "A-after the baby is born... I was thinking I might need to find a job"
John stares at her. "And who's going to look after the kid? We moved here so I could be closer to work, make more money." He looked at her. "You, don't work." John had been brought up his whole life convinced men brought in the funds and it was extremely dishonorable to be a man who failed his family. So he wouldn't let her work, it was a matter of pride
"I know that was one of the reasons, but it was also so our child could grow up somewhere other than a dirty city. And so /you/ could be 'home' again. It would be good for us to have an extra income."
"No. Pegs, I said no." He says to her, getting flustered and angry
She bristles, "No? You're telling me I cannot do something?"
"That's exactly what I am saying. You won't work. You will stay home." He says, his tone harsh
"And why is that? Because you're my husband, and I'm supposed to do every damn thing you say?" She says just as hard
"To obey." He reminds her. "You vowed." He leans closer, his anger growing. "You married me. I am the man, I do the work!" He bites at her
She steps back, not because she's afraid, but because she's shocked. "Are you serious? Do you hear yourself?! You're as bad as my father! Thinking you know what's best for me, and not paying any mind to my opinion on my own life!" Pure rage grow like a ball inside of her
John doesn't back down but her words hurt. "That's because I do know what's best! You are my responsibility. To love and to keep safe and stable. That's my job! I work for you! And for our child!" He sneers. "You have never worked a day in your life for anything anyways!"
Her mouth drops open, then quickly shuts it. "I'm /sorry/ that I happened to be privileged growing up. I can't help that now. I'm more than willing to work for this family. I'm not a maiden in need of defending, I am grown!"
"You're sorry/!" He mocks. "I am sorry my dad spent the entirety of my life when he was alive working what felt like a million miles away to make money for my family who never had enough. And I wouldn't be who I am if my mother had decided to work and leave us alone to ourselves." He stepped closer, crunching a few letters under his feet. "I moved us here so at least I wouldn't be a million miles away from our family. The least you could do is do your part as well!" He shout
She's stunned my his words, "/My/ part? The 'stay at home all day /every/ day for the rest of my life' PART? I regret that I hadn't been closer to my family, but at least /I'm/ not tied to my mother's apron strings!"
"The being a good mother part!" He shrieks, immediately regretting his word, covering his mouth
Peggy's anger melts into hurt, her face mirroring getting punched in the stomach, "Wha— Did you...?"
"I-I am s-sorry." He whispers.
She's speechless, "I-I need to take a break..." she backs away from him, stumbling out the door to God knows where
John watches her. "Peggy, I am sorry! Come back!" He cries. Holding the door. "I-I am so sorry." He cries. Suddenly, he looks down and a sharp blade coated in red blood in through his abdomen. "You should be." A sickening voice says, hot lips pressed to his ear before John falls. Engulfed in the darkness
Thomas: — IG handle : (at sign) _ever_yours_turtle_
Thomas waited for Peggy. He had tied John to a kitchen chair. Leaving him in the middle of living room as he bled out. Thomas waited in the corner, ready to jump Peggy when she comes back.
John moaned, scared he was dying.
After 40 minutes of mindless wandering, she cooled down enough to talk to John. Coming back to the house she knocks, then let's herself in. "John..?"
John coughed up blood. His shirt soaked in it as the handle of the knife shown from his abdomen. "N-no." He whispered, alarm in his voice. "No, P-Peggy go." He tried, his head falling
Her head ships around, "J-John... why at you-" she gasps, "Oh my God" she whispers rushing over to him
"N-no! Go! Sta-" John's head hangs and he sobs. "Watch out" He whispers, but too late.
Thomas jumps her, grabbing her arms and twisting them behind her back. Forcing her to her knees. "You should have stayed Pegs." He whispers sickeningly
Peggy screams, the pain so unexpected and painful. "T-Thomas?" She whimpers helplessly
"Yes, my love." He whispers seductively. Rubbing his lips up her neck slowly.
"I-I'm not your love" she whispers, "You gave me up..."
"The biggest mistake of my life, baby." He pressed her hands tighter.
"What do you want.? You broke out engagement... you didn't want me. /You/ said that"
"I told you baby, my biggest mistake. I missed you so much." He kisses her neck harshly
John struggles, crying out in pain.
She tries wiggling out of his grasp, then hears John cry. Her head snaps in his direction, finally fully looking at him. Her face goes deathly pale, "What did you /do/ to him, Thomas?! He's going to die!" She wails
"I know. Isn't it... exciting?" He purred again her ear
She whimpers, "/Please/ let me go. My /husband/ is dying and I need to go to him
"What can he give you I can't?" He whispers, tightening his grip on her arms.
She gives him a withering look, "Are you blind? He's the father of my /child/."
"Not for long..." he words curled, dancing around the room miserably
For the first time, fear creeps in her voice, "W-What do you mean..?"
"Well... you are mine. He will die, and so will that demon." He bites, staring at her stomach with pure hatred
"I-I'm not yours..." she shrieks, "A-And neither is my baby. Y-you are not you to hurt them"
"You are to late in your husbands/ regard." He whispers. "And soon..." he slides one hand below her shirt, over her stomach, smirking. "We can start again," He whispers, "with me.
"Thomas /please/ stop." She's in tears, "Don't. We ended. You- you didn't want me to be the mother of your children."
"Again, the biggest regret of my life." He mutters against her skin. "I missed you, so much."
She whimpers, "T-Thomas I don't love you. Not anymore."
"No, that's ok. You will." He smells her hair, breathing her in. Laying his hands all over her skin.
Wherever he touches her, she feels he skin crawl, and all she wants is to get away from him. But she can't, he has her arms pinned behind her still. "I'm /married/. I love my husband" she glances over in his direction, feeling a pang in her stomach seeing him like this.
Thomas cackled, taking another rope. Tying her wrists and ankles. Pushing her to the ground and moving to attend to John. Ripping the knife from his back.
John screamed
Peggy flinches at John's scream tears streaming down her face. She tries to sit up, desperate to help him.
Thomas takes the knife and walks back to Peggy. Flipping her over so she is on her back. He drags the blade across the front of her shirt. A smirk on his face as he rips away the fabric
The reality of the situation sinks in, and her body freezes in shock. Terror in her eyes as she watches him. Her chest rising and falling to her short, rapid breaths.
"S-stay a-away from her you son of a b-bitch!" John bites, blood pouring from his mouth on every word
Peggy has never felt so terrified in her life. Sure, she'd had some moments that were frightening, but they paled considerably compared to now.
Thomas ripped the fabric from her chest. Staring at her stomach with an empty, psychotic look. He brought the knife to her skin, pressing it there lightly. At first
Peggy squeals, it ending in a whimper, "T-Thomas... p-please don't do this...
"And do what? I am doing you a favor! You know he isn't what you want! You know he broke your heart!" He bites. Pressing the knife to her skin harder.
John cries out in pain as he desperately attempts to break free "I said leave her alone dammit!" He screams out, blood coating his mouth and shirt as he seemingly looses consciousness
"A favor? Thomas I love him. My heart may have been broken, but it's not /his/ fault!" She's begging him now, "You can have me, okay? I'll be yours. Just please /please/ don't hurt my baby"
"That devils spawn is corrupting you Peggy darling." His words were like a slithering snake. "I am just trying to restore purity to my desert flower." He pressed the knife to her skin tighter, holding her jaw with his other hand
Peggy jerks her head back, "Restoring /what/ purity? You broke us up /because/ of it" she growls
"It was my biggest regret, my dearest charmer." He lays sweet kisses on her neck before turning the knife inwards so as her slightest movement would stab through
She trembles at his kisses, in an immense discomfort. Her eyes never leaving the knife.
John's only half awake. "Kill me... kill me, take everything I have, and everything I own. But p-please... please just let her go." He manages roughly, tears in his eyes.
"John" she whimpers, wanting to silence him. Wishing she wasn't so weak so she could help him
Thomas ran the blade across her stomach, leaving a long cut that seeped with blood. "Say one more thing and the kid is dead." He bites.
John shuts up
She stifles a scream, the cut not deep, but damn does it sting
Thomas cackles at her screams. Taking the shaft of his blade and threatening to jab her in the stomach with it. "Beg for me, Margarita. Why do I spear the spawn of that monster?"
"B-because you say you want me. That you love me. Thomas I'm /begging/! I will give you /anything/ if you'll just let me have my baby"
"I want you, no baby included doll face." He whispers
Her face is white, terrified for the pain. Terrified for John. Most of all, terrified for the child her and John tried so hard for. "N-no, no, no. Please, oh God"
Thomas cackles loudly and strikes her stomach with brute force. His sickening laughter filled the room... but not for long.
John had managed to break free. He jumped Thomas with a scream. Pushing him from Peggy, hovering the tip of his knife over his heart before taking every last force he had and stabbing Thomas. Just before rolling off and hitting the floor sickeningly
Peggy's bonds had loosened in the struggling, so when Thomas strikes her, she screams, and hunches forward her hands clutching her stomach. Knowing immediately that irreversible damage has happened to her child. She pushes it aside for the time being, and crawls over to John, dreading what she'll find, "John?! John!? Oh dear God, say something..." She sobs
John looked around the room, unable to focus until she is above him. He smiles through a wince, reaching up and holding her cheek. "I-I... I am so sorry, Pegs." He whispers, tears in his eyes. His hand being coated in blood from his wound
"Y-you have nothing to be sorry for." Peggy shakes her head, "/I'm/ the one who should apologize" her voice catches. "I-I'm so sorry I failed you"
"Y-you never failed me..." he laughed even. "You gave me everything, you are my everything." He whispered. "I am... I am just so happy. I am happy that the last thing I ever see is your face."
She laughs bitterly, "You had you're heart broken by me. You're /dying/ because of me. Goddammit, I can't even tell you you're going to be a father" she breaks down, her voice cracking. "I can't live without you..."
"Hey, hey. Look at me." He holds her cheek, a small smile on his face. "You can, you will. You need to trust t-that... fate knows what it's doing. I am going to be with you forever." He whispered. "P-pegs, I am going to be with my mom, my dad. My brother... Alexander." He winced. Putting his hand on her bruising stomach. "A-and... Alexander Jr... I have a feeling we have a son." He smiles up at her, tears rolling down his cheeks. "I am with you... forever and always. Fate has a weird way of keeping that so..." He whimpers in pain
"I don't want to live in a world where you aren't in it" she whispers only loud enough for him to hear. "Fate has brought us together and pulled us apart too many times." She presses her hand on top of his, then brings it up to her face. "I think so too. A-Alexander Jr." She tries to smile through her tears, "T-tell him that I love him. That i always will. Dear God, John. I-I can't do this without you."
"You know... you know I think you are one of the strongest people I have ever met. You don't need me. It will all be ok. You'll see..." his eyes flutter. His head bobbles. "I know you. I need you to promise me, promise me you will find someone to share your love with, someone strong, someone who makes you laugh your beautiful laugh... someone who helps you forget." His tears roll down his fluttering eyes, growing dimmer with ever moment. "Like- like you did for me."
She vehemently shakes her head, "No. No. No. I /couldn't/. John I'll never forget you as long as I live. And I don't /want/ to. I honestly don't think I'll ever be happy again. Don't want someone else. I want /you/."
"Peggy, I know you can do this... I never want you to forget. Never. But please, you need to try and find happiness. You can't live the rest of your life without happiness. Find it, don't fight it. I know it hurts... I am so sorry." He grits his teeth, tears rolled heavily. "I am so sorry for leaving like this... this wasn't how it was supposed to e-" he falters, coughing blood. "I am s-sorry, I am sorry.
Even though he's coughing blood, and dying, she has to know what he feels one last time, and leans down, brushing her lips softly against his. "I-I promise to try? I can't deny you that. Stop apologizing. Please." She takes both his hands in her, "Thank you. For giving me faith, and hope, and love. For everything. Know that I'll love you forever."
"I know miss. I know." He kissed her lightly. "I never knew someone like a girl on a train... would be so important. And after... when I..." he can't connect his thought, he feels his eyes closing. "I love you... please smile, please think about me... and when you do, I am there. Right at your side." His head rest on the floor while her stares at the ceiling. An empty gaze on his face. "Y-you know... I used to fear this. It took my parents, my brother, my b-best friend... and yet I feel peace. It's odd... I promised- I promised I wouldn't leave. I am t-trying Pegs..." he whispers. "I love you, but... I've seen so much... I want to see so much more. I am n-not ready yet." He cries
Strangely calm, she looks at him. "Peggy. My name is Margarita, Peggy, Laurens. I'm your wife. I love you with all my heart. You're not leaving me, you'll always be apart of me, that I know for sure." She swallows a sob back, "You were so good to me. I will always ask whatever did I do to deserve you."
"I know what you did... I know why you were on that train..." he says, staring at the ceiling
"What I did?" She stares intently at him
"You... you saved me. Without you, my world was full of grey. With you, It was colorful and happy. When you weren't at my side, I held to the hope that someday you would be. Fate showed me what it's like to get something I lost back... its r-really good. It feels better than anything... it's worth all the pain." He whispers
"You saved /me/. I was scared, lonely, and untrusting. You gave me so much. I never thought I'd feel safe in a man's arms. That I'd get married, or get close enough to have a child—" she chokes on her words, "If I could go back and change any of it, I wouldn't. I'd rather go through this pain than to never have had the love and happiness and fullness I've felt with you."
"Our worlds are bright and full of color together. And apart... it's grey." He thrashed on the floor, coughing violently. "I-I am sorry for turning our world to grey.
"You can't fully appreciate the colors until you've seen grey"
"You've seen the grey now... go find something to keep your life full of color. Forever. Exactly what you deserve." His breathing hitched. "Fate will bring you that... f-fate knows exactly what it's doi-"he collapsed, a sickening silence filled the room before he took on last gasp and his eyes finally fell.
Peggy releases an earth shattering scream, collapsing on top of his body. Her own, racked with sobs. Bewildered with what she's going to do, and how she's going to do it.
A/N 2.0: Yeah... That was really hard. I cried for an hour into my pillow because of this. Please don't fret too much, there's a Part 5 coming, and I can assure you that there are some really fluffy, sweet moments. Love y'all
