Summary

No one has written this story yet so I decided to.

Jax has been broken ever since Tara died. She was what kept him grounded. She was his home of comfort. Jax hasn't had comfort since. Then he sleeps with a prostitute and she comforts him. As unlikely as it is to mean anything long term things happen that push him closer to her.

Jax couldn't spend the night at his house. He did not want his sons to see him like this. He hadn't been able to sleep at his own house for several days. How was he supposed to ruffle Abels' hair and tuck Thomas into bed while Bobby was captured? No. While Bobby was dead.

He was dead, and Jax was lost. This war that was started... he hadn't had peace since his wife Tara had died. Even before that there hadn't been much peace. Tara had always been what held him down. What kept him sane. Without Tara where would he be? What would have happened to his sons? That would happen to them all now?

Everything had crashed. Opie's death; Tara lying about her pregnancy; her trying to divorce him; then making up with her, sacrificing himself for her and his kids only to have her brutally murdered. Taking vengeance on the Chinese for killing her, only to have his girls at Diosa massacred. Those deaths were on him. As was the death of Bobby. It was too much. It was too much.

Jax walked through the doors of Diosa in a mental stupor. He needed.. He needed something. He needed release. Release from the pain; release from the mountain of anguish and responsibility that had fallen on him.

Jax scanned the room of girls in front of him, his expression blank. Blonde, brunette, redhead. He could have any of them. He didn't even know most of their names. He recognized one. Winsome, the girl they rescued from Greensleeves. He walked towards her, he didn't know what he looked like to her. Sadness from the pain and anger from the pain both welled up inside him. She was looking at him as he got to her. Gripping her arm he pulled her to him and kissed her hard. Her lips gave way as he ate at them aggressively.

After minute the kiss broke. Winsome looked up at him, her face flushed. "Upstairs?" she asked breathlessly.

Jax stared at her with fierce desperation, "Yeah."

They got lost in lust and sensuality. Was he fucking her or making love to her? Jax didn't know. All he knew was he needed something and was desperately trying to find it in her. Trying to release his anger as he went at her ferociously. Trying to find solace as he went into her and kissed her. He was lost. But not lost enough.

He went harder, deeper, needier. All his pain welled up in him. All his anguish. Winsome moaned as he reached his climax. He collapsed on her all his emotion breaking loose.

Jax rolled to the side pulling up the sheet to cover Winsome as he did and sobbed. He lay there, tears flowing. Tears for Bobby, tears for Tara, tears for his family.

"Did I do something wrong?" Winsome asked worriedly.

"No." he whispered, shaking his head. Winsome was silent and Jax continued to sniffle.

"I heard from the girls what happened to your wife." Winsome said quietly, "I'm sorry."

"Yeah." Jax whispered. He stopped crying and took a deep breath.

Slowly Winsome sat up. Jax placed his hand on her back and began to trace his fingers along it. Winsome reached for her bra and began to put it on. "Where are you going?" He asked.

"Figured you'd want me to leave." she said softly.

"No. Stay." He looked at her earnestly. "Please." He whispered.