Hey fanficdom! I know I've taken quite the writing hiatus, but I am oh so unsatisfied with the way that season 9 has begun to shape out. I realize that Emily Procter is preggers (so exciting!), but i wish we could just get a little "Delquesne" (as Adam Rodriquez has called the relationship. haha) loving. Anyway, I hope you enjoy this, I warn you it's not much. Just a little something that I found on my computer that I had written forever ago inspired by P!nk's "Please Don't Leave Me".
Please enjoy, and happy holidays!

I always say how I don't need you
But it's always going to come right back to this

It's nights like these that Calleigh Duquesne wonders what has happened to her life.

It wasn't supposed to be like this. Another day, another late night rendezvous tangled in the sheets, soft moans and cries penetrating the cooling Miami air. But now hours later, the unsettling thoughts begin to sink back in.

The man beside her makes a small noise, and for a brief second she feels jealous of the sleep that he seems to always easily find. Not her, however. Tonight sleep is the last thing on her mind. As loathe as she is to admit it, her mind drifts to Eric Delko, as it so often does lately. She misses him. Which in retrospect is strange, as he is laying less than two feet away from her. But the way she misses him isn't physical, the last couple hours reaffirm that. No, she misses the emotional bond that they once had.

Casual. That's how they had defined this relationship that they had breathlessly stumbled back into. There were too many lies, too much distrust between them. They had been friends, best friends, and once they had crossed that ever-blurring boundary Calleigh quickly found herself in the most serious relationship of her life. And the relationship with the most to lose, as she quickly found out.

She wasn't even sure where they stood now. They weren't dating, and friends certainly didn't call each other in the middle of the night for some casual fun. Hell, they weren't even coworkers anymore.

She, Calleigh Duquesne, was the late night call. The last resort for a sleepless night. Period.

If only.

Emotions are tricky things, they run deep. Only in the darkness of the night will she succumb to the feelings nestled deep in her heart. She misses what once was, what they had shared. She knows Eric feels it too, but there are rules for these sort of things. Rules she herself had set in place in order to protect her still bruised heart.

In the light of day nothing ever changes. They go about their lives never speaking of what goes on in the dark, promising each other that it won't happen anymore. Each day harder than the last, "I don't need you" becomes her mantra. The more she says it the more she believes it. That is, until that late night call or text is received. One look, one loving gaze and its back to square one.

Wheels turn and gears click. It's always going to come right back to this, she realizes. Maybe its time to stop running for just once in her life.

Its to much to process, and she knows attempting to sleep will be futile. Slipping out of bed, she heads to the kitchen for a soothing cup of tea.

Tea made, the earthy sent immediately calms her, if just only enough to stop the whirling of thoughts and emotions through her head, at least for a moment.

And then it hits her, she doesn't want this, she wants more. She doesn't want to wonder if one day she might actually move on, she doesn't want there to be any moving on at all.

Calleigh knows that she needs to be rational. She can't deny that the pain of lies still surrounds her,but at the moment the prospect of being back in his arms is too overpowering.

But it's all too much. Under the cover of night, emotions seem to get the best of her. She knows making an intelligent decision requires time, requires processing. But damn, she misses him so much.

So for now she'll settle for this, an obfuscated limbo between what they once were and what they could be.

Tomorrow they'll talk. About his deceit, about her distrust, about everything. But for now she's content to play the role for just one more night.

Setting her now empty mug into the sink, she quietly pads her way back to the bedroom, back to him.

Slipping into bed next to him, she knows that she can't live without him in her life, and as Eric unconsciously pulls her to spoon against him she closes her eyes, deprivation of sleep finally catching up to her.

Eyes snap back open as he whispers her name, still in the sweetest realm of dreams. The reverence there completely shattering any illusion of the precariously built casualty that had been mutually agreed upon. She brings the arm draped across her waist to gently lie against her collar bone. Closing her eyes once again, she whispers four words that she wouldn't dare say in the light of day, but she's never felt were more true.

Please don't leave me.