Chapter 1

I'd rather have bad times with you, than good times with someone else.

I'd rather be beside you in a storm, than safe and warm by myself.

I'd rather have hard times together, than have it easy apart.

I'd rather have the one who holds my heart.

"Damn it." Emma Swan said as she stared at the church before her. Hands clutching the steering wheel of her yellow bug so tightly that her knuckles were white. Letting out a large breath she watched as guests thronged the already packed building. It was the wedding of the year after all, handsome film star Killian Jones wedding the famous model Milah Carrey. It seemed as if half of LA had turned out for the wedding and all of the paparazzi.

"This is crazy." She whispered to herself as the cameras flashed and guest after guest jostled their way into the church. "I don't think I can do this." She said turning in her seat to face her son Henry.

"Yes you can." He smiled. "You need to fight for your happy ending mom, you've got to do this."

"What if he says no." She replied nervously. "I'll humiliate myself in front of all these people?"

"Well, what if he says yes? You've got to at least try or you will always be wondering what if."

"You're right kid." She said with a small nervous smile. In her heart she knew that she had to do this. It was either storming in there and stopping that wedding or piecing her disastrous life back together bit by bit without him, without Killian. "Operation wedding crasher is a go." She said with a squeeze of Henry's hand before slipping out of the car and moving toward the church.

Everywhere she looked people where chatting, sharing fond gestures and smiling. It made her sick to the stomach with nerves, she could not believe that in a few moments she would be ruining it all, it was madness and her conscience demanded an explanation. The only thing she could think of was Killian's face and with that a tidal wave of emotion hit her hard in the chest. Emma shook her head as if to rid her of his image, to do what she had to do she needed a clear mind and thinking of him was not helping that cause. Determined to finish what she started she slipped on a pair of sunglasses hoping not to be noticed by any of Killian's family or the paparazzi (though really the sunglasses made no difference) and began pushing her way through the crowds of people.

The church doors would be closed soon she thought to herself as she checked her watched. With that thought in mind she moved faster, elbowing several fans out of the way and shoving past the masses of paparazzi that had mobbed the church steps.

Bodyguards at the entrance were only allowing through those who were on the guest list. Emma whispered a silent prayer to whoever was listening that she would be allowed through, she should still be on the guest list, after all she was supposed to be the maid of honor. A bubble of hysterical laughter escaped her lips. Maid of honor, how in the hell had she managed to end up being the maid of honor for Killian's wedding? Her life was a mess she thought as she moved into the queue behind one of Milah's cousins.

The urge to run away was strong as doubts plagued her, maybe he didn't want her anymore, after all, he gave Milah the ring and her a broken heart. Not to mention she had turned down every single opportunity that Killian had given her to run away with him because she was too stubborn to accept the fact that she loved him. In her heart Emma had always loved him she just hadn't realized it at the time.

Her throat ran dry as one of the bodyguards asked for her name.

"Emma Swan." She choked as he scanned the list.

He paused for a moment before grunting. "Move through."

Her heart began racing twice as fast as she stepped into the church, stomach twisting into knots. She removed her sunglasses before maneuvering her way around the guests; she managed to position herself behind the last pew so she was near enough to the exit so that she could run if she needed to. Emma stood with her back flat against the wall hidden by a large floral arrangement. Could she really go through with this? Could she really bring herself to ruin it all? The guests were smiling and happy, the church was beautifully decorated with everything perfect down to the very last detail, It was all about to come crashing down because of her and her inability to let him go. The thought made her sick; she had strong morals and a conscience. She could not do this to Milah or Killian. So why was she hiding behind flowers at the back of the church waiting for the service to start?

Swallowing the lump that had formed at the back of her throat she took several deep breaths and began counting down the seconds in her head until the service began. At that moment he strode into the room, confident and assured of the perfect future he was about to commit to with Milah. Emma's head snapped up, instantly sensing his presence. Her heart thudded so loudly she was sure everyone would be able to hear it. He was here. Killian was here. He was just down that aisle, waiting for another girl. Emma's heart broke as she watched him joke around with his best man, blue eyes sparkling as he laughed heartily.

Without warning everyone in the church stood up, the bridal march began playing on the organ and the doors at the back of the church burst open once more. Bright light flooded the church as four bridesmaids entered one by one, beautiful in their purple satin dresses. Emma couldn't help but think that she should have been doing the same, she was supposed to be the maid of honor but everything had gone to shit so fast. Finally Milah swept into the room so beautiful and elegant as she walked arm in arm with her father. She couldn't help but stare at her; she looked perfect in her sweeping white dress with loose brown curls cascading down her back, brown eyes full of life and sparkling with happiness. How could she ever compete with someone as perfect as Milah Carrey.

Emma felt positively sick; she had turned into one of those crazy hopeless romantics who believed that she would get that perfect fairytale ending even when everything was going to shit, because of him. This was all because of Killian Jones. If only she knew why he had left her, why he had decided to abandon her even when he promised he would never do to her what Neal had done. If only she knew what she had done to lose him she would turn back time and fix it all in a heart beat. He still had not told her why to this day; even after everything that had happened since the day they reconnected and all this mess began.

At that moment she decided to sneak a glance at him, he stood with his hands clasped behind his back, a hint of nervousness in his demeanor but with a smile adorning his face. The service began. What the hell was she doing, how could she ruin this for him? She thought. He will be happy with Milah so why couldn't she just let him be free. Because you love him idiot a voice at the back of her head whispered.

Tears pricked her eyes as realization dawned upon her that she couldn't be selfish this time. That she really and truly loved him so much that she had to let him be happy whether it meant him being with her or not. Warm tears streaked down her face as she stared at him, the last flame of hope that she had within her flickering out. She couldn't do this, she had to get out of the church, she had to run because she could not stay and watch as Killian married someone else. Her vision was blurry from the never-ending tears that were spilling onto her soft cheeks. Spinning around towards the door she smashed her arm into the side of the floral arrangement. With a loud bang the stand clattered to the floor as flowers flew in almost every direction. Gasps echoed around the room as all heads turned towards her.

"Swan?" Killian questioned in disbelief.

"Killian." She choked.

"What are you doing here?" he asked, his eyes softening as they locked with hers. Emma inhaled sharply as all the memories they shared came flooding back to her, threatening to overwhelm her in that one moment.

"I – I came to stop the wedding." She stuttered. More gasps emanated from the crowd of guests as Emma swiped away the tears that had fallen. God only knew what was going to happen next but Emma could remember how it all began as if it were yesterday. How could she possibly forget?

Thank you for reading the story, please review and tell me what you think! I hope you all enjoyed it xxx Next chapter we'll be travelling back to the crazy chaos filled beginning to see how it all began.