A/N: Look, a whole new part! Hmmm, smell the freshness of it all.
Disclaimer: Look, I get to come up with fifty (less, seeing as how I forget them sometimes…) new, witty, original or otherwise amusing disclaimers. But as for now, I got nothing. Oh, yeah, I don't own Black Cat.
Chapter One: Fruit or Vegetable?
Sven and Eve stared dejectedly at their table. On it were two tomatoes, a thing of mayonnaise, half a loaf of bread and some salt and pepper.
"'Morning, Eve! 'Morning, Sven!" Train yawned as he came into the room, stretching. Neither bothered to correct him on the correct time of day – the evening – because it wasn't like he cared. "Why are you two just staring at the table like that?" he added, once he had finished stretching.
"This is all the food we have left, and we can't afford to buy anything else," said Sven tonelessly. "And even I don't know what kind of meal you're supposed to make with two tomatoes, a thing of mayo and half a loaf of bread."
"You forgot the salt and pepper," piped up Eve.
"And salt and pepper," Sven added grudgingly.
"Well, you make tomatoes sandwiches, of course!" said Train happily, and he grabbed one of the tomatoes and began slicing it.
"Tomatoes sandwiches?" questioned Sven.
"Sure," said Train, "you just take slices of tomatoes and put them between two pieces of bread, each of which has some mayonnaise spread all nice on, and some salt and pepper sprinkled evenly over that. They're very good!" He didn't add that tomato sandwiches were about all the man that killed his parents and taught him to kill knew how to make.
"But Train," Sven protested, "Eve is a growing child who needs more nutrients than just bread and tomatoes."
"And mayonnaise and salt and pepper," Train pointed out.
"And mayonnaise, salt and pepper," Sven repeated with a roll of his eyes.
"Well, Sven," Train said haughtily, spreading mayonnaise over bread, "It's not like this is all she'll be eating, seeing how this is only one meal. Secondly, she'll be getting a grain, a fruit, a veggy and whatever mayonnaise is. Dairy, maybe?"
"I have no idea what mayo is," Sven growled, "And how is she getting a fruit and a veggy?"
"Well," replied Train, "no one seems to be able to decide whether or not tomatoes are fruits or vegetables, so we can just say she got both!" He finished making his sandwich and took a hearty bite out of it.
"We can?" asked Sven befuddled.
Train nodded, his mouth full of tomato, bread, mayonnaise, salt and pepper.
"No, you can't!" exclaimed Eve, "That's retarded, Train!"
But Train just grinned and walked away. It's not like he cared, anyway.
A/N: Hmmm. How's that for the first chapter? Train's mentor guy doesn't seem like the type to cook, does he? I wanted to have some nice, innocent humor for the first chapter. Because pretty soon, we'll probably end up going back to that humor that makes you go, "shouldn't this story be rated 'M????'" Oh, well. And I didn't mean that Train didn't care about Eve getting all her nutrients, just that he didn't care what other people said about it.
