It was my turn to spy on Loren. But then, it was usually my turn.

See, it's convenient for me. I don't have to demorph or make excuses at home and school. I could spend hours every week watching her. In a strange way, I felt like I knew her. I knew her volunteer hours at the church. I knew when her support groups met and what they talked about. I knew her favorite stations on the radio.

She was listening to a classic rock station as she made breakfast. It was amazing how she did everything on her own. All of the controls on the kitchen appliances had stickers with the raised dots of Braille. She dropped two slices of bread into the toaster and set it to high. She opened the fridge and felt her way along a row of lids marked with textured stickers, stopping at the jelly jar. She pulled it out and hummed along with the final line of "Ain't No Sunshine When She's Gone."

Maybe you shouldn't be so amazed, El said. We managed to adapt to being a hawk, so why couldn't she adjust to being blind and amnesiac?

The next song started. I didn't recognize it, but it sounded like the Rolling Stones. During the chorus, Loren started singing along under her breath. "Gimme, gimme, gimme the honky tonk blues…" Then she stopped in the middle of her bustling morning routine.

I knew by now what it meant when Loren froze up like that. She was remembering. Or maybe not so much remembering as realizing that there was something she ought to remember.

"It's Blue," said Jaxom, her zebra duiker dæmon.

Blue was one of the characters in the shadow play of Loren's memory. Blue was the main reason we spied on her: an Andalite from Loren's past. But there were other characters too. There was Broken Man, and Little One, and a horror for which she had no name. All of us wondered about Blue and the nameless horror, but I wondered about the others too. Why was the Man so Broken? Was Little One her child, somehow lost?

The toaster chimed, and Loren snapped out of her reverie to get a plate for the toast. I decided an hour was enough for today. I flew back out to the woods.

Ax was working on his scoop. He'd already morphed elephant and stomped out the shallow depression of earth. Now he was making a cover he could put up to disguise the scoop and protect it from bad weather.

«Can I help?» I asked, perching in a tree above his scoop.

«Thank you for the offer,» said Ax, «but I think this will be best accomplished on my own.»

«OK then. I'm going to hunt,» I said. «Are you up for going to the valley when I get back?»

Ax twisted a stalk eye toward me. «Might we take a trip to the mall afterward?»

Ax had scaled back his snobbery toward the Hork-Bajir since I passed on the story of Dak and Aldrea, but he still needed to be bribed into tutoring Toby. «Sure. But behave yourself. And this time, come up with a lesson plan before we get to the valley.»

«I received the best education my homeworld has to offer,» Ax sniffed. «I am more than capable of passing it on to a Hork-Bajir.»

I glared at him. Of course, I'm always glaring, but Ax can tell the difference.

I went for my hunt and caught a twitchy little vole. When I got back, Ax had made some progress on the cover for his scoop. I could tell that it would be great camouflage. I may have been a predator for going on a year, but Andalites have lived in harmony with nature for centuries. Even in an alien forest, he knew how to blend in.

«You ready, man?»

«I am ready.» Ax laid down his half-finished scoop cover and morphed harrier.

We didn't talk on the way up to the valley. What I like most about spending time with Ax is how much we don't have to say. There's a kind of language in flying, and Ax has learned to speak it, though not as fluently as I do. We caught the same winds, traded thermals back and forth, and orchestrated long swoops around foothills and through high passes.

I probably think too much for my own good, but I couldn't help but wonder if the Andalite word for a soulmate-friend, shorm, comes from that same place. If there's a language of flight, then there must be a language of the tail-blade as well, a language that shorms can speak together in a bond of trust. But I would never learn it, because I would need Ax's DNA for that, and I had no right to ask for it.

Finding the valley isn't easy, but Ax and I have done it so many times that we can always find it despite the Ellimist's protection. The valley is big, and there was no point wasting time looking for Toby from above when the free Hork-Bajir usually knew where she was and were happy to show us the way.

Ax and I landed in the narrow entrance to the valley. A Hork-Bajir recognized us immediately. The free Hork-Bajir can always tell us apart from real birds. They can see hrala, a fundamental particle of the universe that gathers most strongly around sentient beings. Hrala passes right by birds and other animals as if they were rocks in a stream. It gathers around thinking beings in bright whirlwinds too strange and beautiful to describe. If the Yeerks ever figure out what the Hork-Bajir ability to see hrala means, we'll be in trouble. As it is, the free Hork-Bajir are the only ones who understand that a bird cocooned in hrala isn't really a bird.

"It is Tobias and hruthin," said the Hork-Bajir. "Hello, friends."

«The Andalite's name is Ax, Ghat Hefrin. You know that.»

"Ax and Tobias. Friends," said Ghat.

«Yes, we are. Thank you, Ghat,» I said. «Do you know where Toby is? It's learning time for her.»

"Toby love learning time! Ghat will find Toby. Follow, friends."

Ax stopped behind a tree to demorph – the free Hork-Bajir got used to the idea of morphing eventually, but like any other sane people they didn't like to watch – then trotted nimbly after me and Ghat as she swung from tree to tree and I followed overhead.

After a short while I became aware that Toby had skillfully hidden herself in a tree up ahead. I had a feeling about what was about to happen, and I said nothing. Toby waited until Ax passed under her tree, then dropped from it noiselessly, grabbing Ax's tail just below the blade as she landed.

"Gotcha!" she crowed.

Ax flexed his tail, but Toby held firm, and the placement of her grip meant that Ax couldn't bring his blade to bear. «Let go of me, you little brute!» he cried, but Toby just grinned. Then he lashed out with one of his hind legs, kicking her hard in the thigh with his hoof. She gave a squawk of pain and lurched backward, letting go of Ax's tail in her surprise.

"Toby!" said Ghat Hefrin. "Ax is friend! Hurt friends is bad!"

"But Ghat, I need to practice fighting Andalites!" Toby protested. "Or else how will I know what to do if I have to fight Visser Three? See, now I know that you have to watch out for the kick. Ouch."

«Ghat, Toby is just practicing,» I said. «Ax doesn't mind.»

«I never agreed to having my tail grabbed by a savage child,» Ax sniffed.

«Ax, you're not helping. Look, Ghat, Toby and Ax do this every time he visits. Please don't worry.»

"Tobias speak true?" Ghat asked Ax and Toby.

«Yes,» Ax admitted grudgingly. «It has become a habit of ours. I have learned to cope with Toby's disregard for my dignity.»

"It's very good practice, Ghat," said Toby eagerly.

"Ghat see that Ax and Toby and Tobias speak true. Sometimes Hork-Bajir must learn hurt to stay free. But Toby only hurt Ax for learning time. Must say so to Ghat."

"I say so, Ghat," said Toby. "I'll only hurt Ax so I can learn how to fight."

"Good. Learn good, Toby." Ghat swung away through the treetops.

«I guess it does take a village,» I said.

Ax and Toby both stared at him blankly.

«Sorry. It's a human saying. "It takes a village to raise a child."»

«I see,» said Ax, watching me with all four of his eyes. It made me uncomfortable. What I'd said didn't mean anything, really. I was just noticing how many Hork-Bajir look after and care for Toby.

"I wish Hork-Bajir had sayings," Toby said.

«All of the Hork-Bajir in the valley say "Free or dead,"» I said. «Isn't that a saying?»

"They say that just because my parents say it," said Toby.

«So they don't know what it means? When your parents say it, they don't know what it means?»

Toby had the grace to look ashamed.

«Look, Toby,» I said. «If you want to believe your people are stupid and worthless, then go ahead. I can't stop you. But I don't think they are, and I don't think you should either. Now, do you have your assignment ready for Ax?»

"Yes," said Toby. "Follow me."

We followed Toby to her tree. Tucked in the cup of two branches was a duffel bag full of books, notebooks, and extra-large pencils that Toby's hands could hold, all items that Ax and I had bought at Goodwill and brought up to the valley. She took out a notebook and flipped to a page full of calculations and diagrams. "Here," she said, handing it to Ax. She looked a little nervous. "How did I do?"

Ax read the page with his main eyes, watching Toby with one stalk eye and scanning around with the other. «Correct,» he said. «Asssaht is 90 light-years from Earth and 10 light-years from the Yeerk homeworld. However, you could have used a swifter method for calibrating against the periodicity of the pulsar, here.» He took one of Toby's pencils and showed her more calculations on a fresh page in the notebook. It all went over my head – I only got as far as basic geometry before I dropped out – but I understood the basic idea. Ax was showing Toby how to calculate interstellar distances using pulsars, stars which give off bursts of light on a schedule as reliable as an atomic clock.

Toby got out a scientific calculator and pressed the buttons as gently as she could with her claws. When she wrote down an answer, Ax nodded. «Good.»

Teaching Toby, I've gotten to know Hork-Bajir facial expressions pretty well, and I could tell that she was pleased by Ax's praise. She would never have admitted it, because she mostly likes to complain about how snobbish Ax is toward other species, and wouldn't want him to think that his opinion was important to her. To tell the truth, she's right about Ax being a snob. But he's also a pretty good teacher, and it's hard not to want to impress a good teacher.

Like we used to be with Mr. Feyroyan, El mused. When we turned in a good essay, he'd pay attention to us and no one else. He was the only one…

«I'm certain you have noticed how near Asssaht is to the Yeerk homeworld,» Ax said. «Asssaht was the first planet to fall to the Yeerk Empire. They began the invasion by sending a reconnaissance mission to assess the technology of the Ssstram and their suitability as hosts. They were not ideal hosts. Asssaht is a very low-gravity world, and the Ssstram are crushed to death by any gravitational field greater than the one in which they evolved. Still, the Yeerks were hungry for hosts, and Ssstram-Controllers are even now deployed in zero-gravity situations.

«Their strategy for colonizing Asssaht was ingenious. Ssstram reproduce by laying unfertilized eggs in clutches, and fertilizing clutches laid by other individuals. However, the survival of offspring is limited by the availability of arsenic compounds. The Yeerk homeworld is rich in these compounds. The Yeerks infested one Ssstram, stole a clutch of unfertilized eggs, treated them with arsenate, and fertilized them. Ssstram mature quickly, and soon they had fifty more Ssstram-Controllers. They continued this practice until they were able to overwhelm the Ssstram with sheer numbers.

«Their strategy backfired, however. Using one parent to fertilize hundreds of eggs at a time meant that genetic variation in Ssstram hosts was low. A virulent disease to which few Ssstram were resistant infected and killed the majority of Ssstram hosts. Due to this disaster, and the low gravity tolerance of Ssstram, it is estimated that there are only a thousand Ssstram-Controllers.»

"Are there any free Ssstram left?" said Toby.

«Perhaps. Andalite intelligence has never been able to penetrate Asssaht itself. Our information comes from two captured Ssstram-Controllers.»

"And how did you extract the information from these prisoners?" Toby said.

«The Andalite military follows the highest ethical – » Ax began, but he remembered who he was talking to, and didn't finish the sentence. When he'd heard the part of Jara's story about Alloran and the quantum virus, he hadn't wanted to believe it. But the fact of Alloran's disgrace, and the silence from the higher-ups about what really happened on the Hork-Bajir homeworld, spoke for themselves, and Ax finally accepted it as truth. With that and the treachery aboard the Asculan on Leera, the Andalite military had been pretty well knocked off Ax's pedestal. Finally, he said, «I do not know. I only know the hosts survived. They now serve as Asssaht's government-in-exile.»

"How does Ssstram government work?" Toby asked.

«I do not know,» Ax said, a little sheepishly. «I found xenoanthropology a very dull subject.»

"I bet you don't feel that way anymore," Toby said.

Ax looked at me and Toby. «No. I do not. Now, let me instruct you about the technology the Yeerks stole from the Ssstram…»

He taught Toby more about the Yeerk conquest of Asssaht, then assigned her an essay on Yeerk strategy in that first battle of the war, contrasting their strategy then with their strategy now. Some of the details of military strategy were pretty boring to me, but I could see how important it could be for Toby, the young general of her people.

«My turn,» I said, when Ax had wrapped up. «Do you have your essay on Ender's Game

"Yes," said Toby. She flipped her notebook to a different section, and I read the essay over her shoulder, telling her to turn the page when I needed it. Ax hung around, pretending to be bored, but I knew he would want to hear what we talked about; he'd read the book too.

I took a few minutes to absorb what Toby had said about the book. «You have a problem with the ending, when Ender realizes that making war with the buggers was wrong. You think it's ultimately anthropocentric, because Ender can only accept that the bugger queen is like him when he realizes that she keeps her dæmon on the inside."

"Yes," said Toby. "Having a dæmon or not is a totally human-centered way of deciding whether someone is worthy of moral consideration. I don't think of myself as having a dæmon on the inside. I think of humans as having part of their minds on the outside."

I'm not on the outside – or at least, I only am for two hours at a time, Elhariel thought, but she didn't push the issue. I wasn't entirely sure how human we were, anyway. «OK, then. What's your alternative? How can we decide whether someone is worthy of moral consideration, as you put it?»

"Whether they have hrala," Toby said. "That applies to everyone, dæmon or no dæmon."

«But isn't that a Hork-Bajir-centered view? No other species can see hrala

"Even if you can't see it, it's there."

«Some humans would probably say that you do have a dæmon on the inside, even if you don't know it. How is that any different?»

"It's different because it's completely subjective who has a 'dæmon on the inside' or not. I'm sure some human bigots would say that Hork-Bajir don't have dæmons on the inside, because we're stupid and primitive. But hrala is objective. You could introduce a being to any Hork-Bajir observer and they would independently agree whether that being has a lot of hrala or a little. Hrala has nothing to do with our opinions. It's just there, and we see it."

«All right. What if you met a being with no hrala who came up to you and said, "Hi, nice to meet you, won't you please treat me the same way you treat your people?"»

Toby recoiled. "Such a thing could never happen! All beings who tell stories have hrala. The being's voice must have come from somewhere else, like one of your human telephones."

«How do you know?» I insisted. «Until I met Elfangor, I would have said that all beings who tell stories have dæmons. But now I know that's not true. So isn't it possible you might one day meet someone who has no hrala but wants to be treated as an equal? And if that did happen, how would you decide whether to treat them the way they asked or not?»

«I suppose if this being were able to ask that question,» said Ax, «then it would be intelligent enough that I must grant its request.»

Toby rounded on Ax. "Intelligent enough? Is that your standard, Andalite?"

«Toby,» I said gently, «we know your people are able to ask that question. They'd just ask it differently.»

"You're missing the point," Toby said. "Ghat Hefrin's dhalashi, Dref Fakash, was abused so badly by the Yeerks they permanently injured his brain. He can only speak in tiny fragments now, when he can speak at all. Ghat says he's still himself, and I believe her. But he couldn't ask you to treat him the way you would anyone else. I'm not sure if he knows how, anymore. But he still deserves respect."

«But he would ask us to respect him,» said Tobias, «if he could. Right?»

"Right," said Toby, staunchly, shooting Ax a look that dared him to say otherwise.

«The Yeerks are perfectly capable of demanding our respect. Does that mean we should do so?» said Ax, not trying to hide his contempt.

"No," said Toby. "They lost that right when they enslaved us."

«Cassie would say we should, anyway, when we can,» I said, carefully. Toby didn't know about the incident with Cassie and Aftran, and I didn't want to tell her without consulting Cassie and Jake first. «Most of them don't know any better. They've been taught all their lives that their hosts are inferior, just like Ax grew up learning that he should never talk about Andalite history and culture to outsiders. Some of them, when they realize that we're just like them, change their minds.»

Ax took the hint and scuffed his hoof along the grass. I wasn't sure if Toby had figured out yet that the gesture meant he was embarrassed.

"Maybe there are some Yeerks that can learn," said Toby. "But for better or for worse, it's too late now. They've been indoctrinated by the Vissers and the Council of Thirteen. We have to assume they're enemies and treat them accordingly."

«Toby is correct,» said Ax. «When a Hork-Bajir-Controller is on the attack, one cannot waste time wondering if the Yeerk inside its head might be reformed.»

«All right, fine,» I said. «This is war. Ruthlessness wins. But when we do have time to plan, we should think about the Yeerks as more than just enemies. It's like Ender and the buggers, right? They're sentient beings, and we can't forget that.»

Ax and Toby both seemed uneasy with what I said. But they couldn't dismiss it. They'd both had too many experiences with people very different from them. All of us were outcasts on Earth, adrift among strangers. We knew how Ender felt.

"Who are these human philosophers mentioned in the book, Locke and Demosthenes?" Toby asked, to break the long silence.

«I don't know,» I admitted. «But Ax and I can bring you info next time we visit, if you want.»

"Please," said Toby. "Also, did you see the part in my essay when I talked about when Ender murdered the other human boy? The older boy who gathered packs to brutalize Ender? The book called these attacks 'bullying.' Is this common among humans?"

I froze. I didn't know what to say. I'd picked this book because I thought it would get Toby thinking about the morality of war. I never thought she'd bring up the bullying.

You don't have to make it about you, said El. Just tell her the truth.

«Yeah. It happens all the time,» I said. «Bullies are weak people who pick fights they know they can win so they can feel like they aren't weak. There's always somebody who thinks that's a good way to feel better about themselves.»

"When Ax teaches me tactics, he says guerrilla fighters should only choose fights they know they can win," Toby pointed out.

«True. But we didn't pick this fight. The Yeerks did, when they invaded our planet. We're the exact opposite of bullies, Toby. Now, can you show me the list of all the words you learned from Ender's Game

Toby showed me her new vocabulary list, and I asked her to write an essay or a story for next time that used all of her new words correctly.

"I have one more question," said Toby. "More for Ax than for you, Tobias. Those tactics Ender used in his battles – do those actually work? Like what he did with changing formations all the time so the enemy can't predict what they'll do next?"

«They require intensive drilling,» said Ax, «so that each platoon can change from one formation to the next without pausing to think. It must be on the level of muscle memory. But yes, those tactics work.»

"I want to read more science fiction like this," said Toby.

«Next time, we'll bring you a new book,» I promised her.

Toby turned to Ax. "Can we play chess now?"

Ax hesitated and glanced at me with his stalk eyes. He wanted to go to the mall already, I could tell. «Come on,» I told him in private thought-speak. «Just one game. It's not cinnamon buns, but I know you like it.»

«Very well,» Ax told her. «One match.»

"Yes!" Toby crowed. "I'm going to beat you, hruthin." She took out the chess set I'd brought her a few months ago, thinking it would be good for her to learn about humans like to pass the time. I never thought that both she and Ax would get so into it. I had only played it a few times at chess club after school, and now Ax and Toby were both better than me, even though I was the one who taught them how to play.

They set up the board on a big rock with a surface that was more or less flat. It was a secondhand chess set I spotted at a garage sale, so the pieces were plastic and most of them were chipped. The black king had an arm of its cross missing, and there were scratches on some of the pawns. But both Toby and Ax stared at the board as if it were a tiny battlefield.

Both of them made aggressive plays toward the center of the board. They each brought out a knight, then Ax let loose his bishop. Toby was first to capture one of Ax's pawns, but Ax managed to castle first, protecting his king.

Toby moved the pieces as delicately as she could, built as they were for small soft human hands. Ax's many fingers curled around his king's chipped cross as he swapped its position with the rook. Toby's snake neck curved down as she studied the board, while on his side, Ax rested his palms on the rock, watching Toby with his stalk eyes. It was an unlikely sight, one that any of my friends would have laughed in surprise to see, but one I always took an interest in watching.

They have a lot in common, El mused, if you think about it. Their species are both peaceful herbivores by nature, but they're both warriors. Toby is the leader of her people, and Ax – well, when the Andalites come, I have a feeling he's going to be a leader too.

Toby moved a knight. "Check," she said. Ax's main eyes narrowed.

I wasn't used to thinking of Ax that way. His people were so far away I didn't often think of his role in their society. Do you think so? Even though he broke the law of Seerow's Kindness?

Ax moved his knight to capture Toby's. The move held off the threat to his king, but it opened up two of his pawns for capture.

When they see how we've used the morphing power, they'll look past that. The commander on Leera did. They have to, El insisted. Ax is a hero.

Our heart swelled with pride, for both of them. Ax is a hero, and I'm lucky that he calls me shorm. Toby was learning so fast, even though Ax and I weren't really teachers. And if we hadn't taken that shortcut through the construction site, we would never have known them.

You would have me, El said.

Yes, I'd have you. And nothing else worth having.

"Checkmate!" Toby cried.

«That is not a checkmate,» Ax said heatedly.

"Yes it is. Look. How could you possibly stop me?"

I looked at the board and took in the arrangement of the pieces. «Sorry, Ax-man. Toby's got you there. Your queen's two moves away.»

«I suppose you are right,» Ax conceded. «That was a strong endgame, Toby.»

Toby grinned. "Wanna play me, Tobias?"

«No way, you'd crush me,» I said. «Besides, I promised Ax we could go to the mall after this. We're going to get you a new book while we're there.»

I could tell Toby was disappointed. She loves it when Ax and I visit. But the promise of a new book kept her from insisting. "All right. When will you come back?"

«Tomorrow,» I said. «Have your assignments ready for us.»

"Yes, sir!" Toby quipped.

«If you're not careful, you'll get as cheeky as Marco,» I said, before I remembered that Toby had never met Marco. It was easy to forget. The Hork-Bajir and the Animorphs are the only people I ever talk to, so I just assumed they all knew each other as well as I knew them.

"One day, I will meet these human Animorphs I've heard so much about," Toby said. "Are they more polite than Ax?"

Ax bristled a little. I laughed. «No, not really.»

Toby's amber eyes went flinty. "No matter. They'll learn to respect me."

«I'm sure they will,» I said gently. I knew Ax had, even if he didn't show it much. «C'mon, Ax. Get wings.»

Toby watched Ax morph harrier. When she was little, she hated watching us morph. Hey, I've seen morphing about a thousand times, and I hate watching it. But now she watches every time, even though she must still find it as disgusting as everyone else does. I'm not sure why. Maybe she wants to understand it. Maybe she wishes she could morph too. If that's true, she's never said so.

As Ax and I flew out of the valley, I said, «Tell me the truth, Ax. Do you respect Toby?»

A long pause. Then, stiffly: «She is my student. As per your request. A hard-working student.»

«That's not answering the question.»

«She is young. Eight months old, by Earth reckoning. But Hork-Bajir grow fast. She is as mature of mind as you or I. I believe what I am trying to say is – yes. I respect her. Not the way I respect you or the others. But I do.» Irony crept into his thought-speech. «How my people would deride me if they knew! Aximili, the alien-lover, who respects humans and Hork-Bajir as though they were equals.»

«The humans wouldn't believe Ender if he told them the bugger queen was an equal. That's why he had to hide her away.»

«The Hork-Bajir are hidden. But they cannot remain so forever. The truth will emerge. Perhaps it is not my best judgment, but when that happens, I will stand by what I believe, no matter what my people say. And they will hold me in the same contempt that they hold the inferior species, as though I were one of you.»

«Well, you'll be in good company,» I said. «Right?»

«Yes,» said Ax. «I fear I have developed an inordinate fondness for inferior species. I think I may enjoy being inferior.»

«Hey, I think you just made a joke, Ax.»

«Did I?»

«I thought it was funny,» I offered.

We stopped by the beginnings of Ax's scoop to get some money. Ax and I collect change whenever we can, and the others give us whatever they can spare from their allowances. It's not like we need much. Ax got out his human clothes, bought by Rachel of course, and morphed. I settled on his shoulder and we headed to the mall.

Ax and I are used to impersonating human and dæmon. We looked just like anyone else at the mall. Ax got cinnamon buns first, so he wouldn't get sugar all over whichever book we bought. Then we went to the bookstore. I directed Ax to the science fiction section. I mostly brought Toby science fiction books to read, because science fiction would probably be more real to her than any other genre, but also because I know science fiction books the best. I chose a collection of short stories by Isaac Asimov and Ax paid for it.

We made it back to the woods just in time for Ax to demorph. Ax and I read the book together for a while, Ax turning the pages while I sat on a branch overhead. Ax reads faster than me, but he always waits to turn the page until I tell him I'm ready.

We read short stories until the sun was too dim to read by. Then I helped Ax with more preparations for his scoop until the sky was completely dark.

«Should be safe to make the rounds now,» I said, when the moon was high. Ax knew what I meant. I like to wait to visit our human friends until it's dark enough that no one will notice a hawk hanging out near a house.

«Will you visit Prince Jake?»

«No. Rachel. But I can stop by and say hi to Jake for you if you want.»

«There is no need. Enjoy your visit.»

I flew to Rachel's house. I'd been visiting her more often since… well, since David. It was hard on all of us, but I think it was hardest on Rachel. We were all a part of the plot to murder him – none of us could claim we were innocent – but it was Rachel who dealt the killing blow. We didn't really talk about what happened, but one time we visited David's grave together, and El always reminded Abineng how beautiful his form is, even though he settled during a bad time. As her friend, it was the least I could do.

I landed in the tree near Rachel's window. I used to come right up to her windowsill and tap on the glass, but not anymore. It was too risky, if anyone else in the house noticed, and besides, Rachel didn't startle well these days. I reached out with my thought-speech. «Rachel?»

She wasn't in her room, but she must have been nearby, because Abineng walked in through her bedroom door and looked for me through the glass. Rachel closed the bedroom door behind her, came up to the window, and opened it. I flew into her room, perching on the back of her chair. «How are you?» El said. «Your coat looks very shiny today, Abi.»

"Fine. Thanks," said Abi, standing a little straighter on his hooves, but Rachel looked impatient. "Someone's come to the school to ask about you, Tobias," she said.

«About me?» I said. «Who?» I couldn't imagine who would care enough to ask.

"A lawyer with a dragonfly dæmon," said Rachel. "He says he was your father's lawyer. Says his client is some woman named Aria. He said that she's your cousin."

«Aria? Isn't that a song they sing in an opera?»

Rachel leaned toward me, so her bedside lamp illuminated her face and the logo on the long sports jersey she wore. I wondered, vaguely, if it were a hand-me-down from Tom or Jake. "Who cares what her name means?"

«My cousin?» My aunt never had kids, and my uncle Leo's ex-wife got custody of his kids in the divorce, before I was born. I guessed she could be one of Leo's, or maybe her mom was my aunt and uncle's older sister Tammy, who died in a car accident when I was two. «Who does she say she's related to? I mean, who is her mother or father? What shape is her dæmon?»

"I don't know," Rachel said snappishly. "She wasn't there. I got it secondhand from Chapman."

I didn't like the sound of any of it. Everyone who's ever told me they were going to take care of me turned out to be lying. I trusted Jake as my leader, Toby as my student, Ax as my shorm, the rest of the Animorphs as my comrades-in-arms and friends. But I didn't trust anyone as my parent, or anything remotely like one.

But Rachel said Aria wanted to give me a home. A place to call my own. For her, I could be human, have El with me all the time. I could feel the longing in her at the thought.

Aria didn't have to be a parent. She could just be family. I'd seen that from the outside, between Rachel and Jake. But I had no idea what that felt like.

We could find out, El whispered in my mind.

I fled Rachel, and El's traitorous thoughts, into the night.