Be A Man… Misaki

Disclaimer: Junjou Romantica aint mine ya hear !

There are some men in the world that are unambiguously male. Unquestionably, identifiably, inherently male. Tall and broad shouldered these men apparently share the same XY chromosome with me. These creatures have feet the size of concrete slabs, have five o'clock shadows, legs like carved tree trunks and quite possibly have hair on their chests. These are undoubtedly men.

When it came to me, it seems as though my mother's uterus had made a fatal error in deciding what it would produce. After my brother coming up with Takahiro – my giant of a brother, oblivious as he can be at times - and the ten years of being out of action my mothers womb was lazy and unable to pay attention. 'Well it should definitely have big green eyes' the uterus thought. 'Yes big green eyes. Should we give it strong arms? Nah keep it skinny it will go with the eyes.'

'Skinny arms eh? Might as well give it skinny legs and make it short, leg hair?' 'Nah looks like it turning out to be a girl.' 'Ok boobs. Wait NO that's a penis. Take it back, TAKE IT BACK'

The result of not paying any attention was me a he-she Asian highbred. I have sensual full bodied lips, hands like a well manicured woman's' and despite my small frame I have a temper that could actually be fearful if I didn't look like a chid throwing a cute little temper tantrum. All in all it is a confused and strange body to inhabit.

At first my looks had never concerned me that is until people began confusing me with a girl, add that with my skill at both cooking and cleaning – at one point at high school camp a girl called out to me as I walked out of the water " MISAKI! Oh my god if you had tits you would have my ideal body" which was humiliating enough but a fried had to call out " he can cook and clean like a pro too"- well you would begin to develop some issues also. But never had my looks' and skills bothered me as such as when I began to live with Usagi-san. Not only did I cook and clean for the man but I also slept with him. He owned the apartment we lived in he dominated me in bed, in all honesty I played the role of his wife. So after an incident on a train, - where I met another undoubtedly male man. - I decided I should take action and created a plan to become more masculine, starting with my height. I had planed to grow one centimetre per year plan.(1) Once I told Usagi-san my plan he chose to help by supplying me with heaps of calcium based foods, but Aisans aren't known for having a strong tolerance to lactose (2) so five hours later after devouring all the food given to me the resulting farts were indescribably rancid.

I hated my self and the farts would not stop. Later when Usagi-san came out of his office tired from working, the farts had still not subsided, and by bed time my bowls were putting on a musical that could rival the sound of music. Sighing, Usagi-san tried to 'massage them out of me' rather than having me leak out gas during the night. But I was still going.

"Misaki, I don't think you need to continue on with this plan. You're fine the way you are" Usagi-san said as he continued to lovingly massage my stomach. I nodded and then I farted making Usagi-san gag and dry reach. It was official I was repulsive, but as my bowls continued to spasm and release more toxic fumes; I couldn't help but think 'being disgusting that's manly isn't it?'

1. I had to be vague on this part because I couldn't remember the full plan and the internet wont let me look it up.

2. This is only from personal experience. I'm part Asian and believe me lactose and my family does not mix. It is the reason why I avoid milk as much as possible. I mean I don't even eat cereal.

OK I got this idea from growing up Asian. I want to do two more because I thought this one was funny.. Review. No review's no continue..

SORA :