53. ➝ "Shouldn't you be sleeping?"

Toris sighed heavily when he walked into their room, his clothes too big and baggy, making him look even smaller than he already felt, than he already was. He shrugged off the brown jacket that had survived for years on end, before walking towards the bed. The shoes stayed on, too tired to remove them, and he fell onto the bed that seemed more like an oasis to the overworked Lithuanian. He could feel himself already drifting off, his eyes not even closed, but he was stirred back to reality when the bed moved, and he noticed that his other half was still awake, his glasses not even removed.

"It's late." Commented Toris, hardly looking up as his boyfriend threw his legs over the bed. Eduard chuckled slightly.

"Ah, I couldn't tell." He said, making Toris smile, despite his face muscles aching from faking smiles all day, but a true smile was welcomed by the brunette, and he took the time to relish in it.

Eduard walked to the other side of the bed, his footsteps light. Toris was tired of heavy boots on hardwood, he much prefered Eduard's thin socks on carpet to them.

"Like a mouse." Toris said to himself, though Eduard had no idea what he was talking about. The blonde got down on his knee to examine Toris, who turned his head to meet his eyes. Blue one's wore a deep concern for his sleepy green ones.

"Are you worried about me?" Toris asked, as a hand ran through his hair. Eduard's hands felt nice, so Toris allowed the action, though he was usually very peculiar about it. But now he was too tired to argue. Hell, if Ivan had walked in and began playing with his hair, he doubted he'd have the energy to object. Especially if his hands were anything like Eduard's, which they weren't. Eduard's hands were softer and gentler.

"I'm worried about the bed, you're tracking dirt into it." Eduard said, semi jokingly. Toris decided to take it as a complete joke though, and simply relaxed more on the bed.

"Can you help me out? I'm too tired to move." Toris confessed. Of course, he could move, if he wanted, but he could afford to be lazy around Eduard, who simply shook his head and laughed quietly. The Estonian straightened up and walked towards the end of the bed, removing Toris's shoes, and tossing them to the side. Toris flinched a bit when he heard them hit, but relaxed even more when they were off.

"You work too much." Eduard said, moving up the bed a bit and untying the apron strings behind Toris's back. Though they weren't tight, when he felt the apron loosen around his waist, he could feel as if he was breathing fresh air. His day as maid was over, and he could begin the night as Toris. He quickly decided to help rid himself of the dreaded garment, and removed it from around his neck,before sitting up slightly to pull it out from underneath him. Only, Eduard noticed, and decided to speak up.

"No, sit up all the way, you are stripping." Toris didn't mind, though he didn't really want to sit up. But he did as he was told, he was used to following instructions anyways, though, he knew Eduard's were far less demanding than a certain boss he was working for. He sat up on the bed, swinging his legs over the side so he was sitting on the edge. Eduard stood in front of him, and gently cupped his cheeks.

"You look like a wreck." He said.

"I feel like one." Toris replied, before allowing his shirt to be unbuttoned by the other. Slowly, his arms were slid out of the warmth of his top, and he was beginning to regret allowing Eduard to undress him, but he knew that soon the heat would be replaced by the other laying beside him.

Eduard undid his pants as well, but Toris decided to take control after that, not wanting to be completely stripped by the other. His face was heating up, and though he knew Eduard had no ill intentions, he was still very uncomfortable with sharing that sort of intimacy. Eduard was accepting of that though.

Toris slowly removed his pants, and shivered slightly, noticing how cold the room was. It didn't come as a surprise though, Eduard liked sleeping in the cold. Well, he liked the room being freezing, and staying warm and comfortable under a heavy blanket. But it always meant a morning of having to walk through a freezing room to try and turn of the fan or shut the window. Tonight, it was the window, with a autumn breeze making the air even more frigid than he was used to.

"Why do you try and freeze me out of my own house?" Toris asked teasingly as pajama pants and a shirt was brought to him by the man who was doing said freezing. Eduard chuckled and threw the clothes on the other's lap.

"I'd have thought you'd be used to it by now." He said, making the Lithuanian snort as he began to dress himself. When he was wearing his plaid sleepwear, which had been a gift from their friend Tino, who promised that it was the warmest he had, and Toris couldn't deny that it was very warm, he laid back down in the bed, pulling the blanket up to his chin. Eduard watched him as he did so, before he sat next to the other, which came as a surprise to Toris, who had thought he would simply get in bed and go to sleep.

"Are you happy, Toris?" Came a familiar whisper. Toris sighed and closed his eyes. He didn't want this conversation. Not when he was trying to sleep, trying to forget about all the reasons he wasn't happy. Eduard's kind hands slowly rubbed Toris's back, and he liked the touches, though he was now a bit irritated with the one giving them.

"When I am with you, I am happy." Came his usual answer, and it was true. Toris was in a much better place now than he had been a year ago, when he was living with Ivan and working as his full time maid. It had been awful, damn near miserable. Toris met Eduard when he had came over and tried to fix Ivan's computer, the man was more technologically illiterate than a man from the 1800's, and they had slowly been falling in love ever since. Toris wasn't sure he loved the other, even now, though he had said it plenty of times. But he loved him in some way, in a way that would break his heart if he left. He couldn't say he loved him fully though, not until Toris was willing to say he was unhappy, and change that. If he could better himself, he would be worthy enough to love Eduard, but he wasn't ready.

Eduard shook his head, though Toris couldn't see. Eduard hated that answered. Of course he thought he brought Toris happiness, but what did that mean if he couldn't save him from the awful life he was living? The blonde knew Toris was more than a broom bearing man, he was intelligent and thoughtful. He could do so many things, if he would just admit he hated what he was and left. But Eduard wouldn't force the subject. He knew better than to do that, it would only make Toris distant. The only thing he could do was support him, until he came to terms himself.

"Alright. Goodnight, Toris." Eduard said, standing up. He walked to the head of the bed and bent down, kissing Toris's hair. Eduard could smell the sweat he had perspired throughout the day, and the other's hair was greasy and unkempt, but he still kissed it anyways, because he loved the other.

Toris appreciated when Eduard loved him, even at his dirtiest.

"I love you." Toris said into the softness of his pillow. Eduard walked to the other side of the bed and crawled in. Without a response Toris wasn't sure if he had been heard or not, but he was too lazy to say the emotional words again, they carried enough weight as it was. And arm wrapped around him, and soon Eduard was pressed against him, his body smelling like the soap that they shared, which was a much more comforting scent on the blonde than on him. He breathed it in, before he began to feel himself drift off, forgetting about the heavy words he had spoken, or the promises he wasn't making.

"I love you too." Came a voice from far off, Toris wasn't even sure if it was real. But it felt real, it felt close. He cuddled into those words, and dreamt that they were real.