Eru the Babysitter:

The Business starts

Eru sat on his throne, being bored. Ever since he created the Valar, there was

nothing to do. All the Elves paid tribute to them instead of him, so he was broke too.

He needed a job.

Yes, he would become a babysitter. There are definitely a lot of Elfings that

needed someone to watch them while their mommies and daddies went to PG-13 movies.

But which ones? Well, there's Cirdan, Gil-galad, Earendil, Glorfindel, Erestor, Galadriel,

Celeborn, Oropher, Feanor, Fingolfin, Finarfin...

Eru could already smell the money. He decided to start right away. Immediately,

he printed out ads for his new business. How hard could watching a few Elfings be

anyways? He would just use his godliness stuff on them. As soon as he was done

making the ads, he looked for his tape. They were the strongest tape in all of Arda and

Valinor. He found them under a millennia-old pile of laundry. Note to self #1-When

incredibly rich, hire a maid. He posted his ads everywhere. On trees, by gates, under

desks, and in front of people's faces, just to make sure people could see them. When he

was done with his first stack, he noticed he didn't have any more paper to print them out

on. Note to self #2-When incredibly rich, buy more paper.

Eru sat himself back on his throne and waited for calls. An hour, two hours,

three, four, five...then he realized he didn't put his phone number on the ads. With that,

he went to collect all of his ads back.

"I can't believe I was so stupid. The troubles I go through to earn a few dollars."

When he finally sat back on his throne after hours of taking up ads, he realized that he

didn't have a phone. Note to self #3-When incredibly rich, buy a phone.

TBC...

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