Lassiter was getting tired of Shawn Spencer. This case with the Artemis Crime Family was going nowhere and Shawn was being more annoying than usual. I just need some coffee, he thought to himself, and what do you know there's a coffee shop! He rubbed his eyes as he got out of the car. I'm just so damn tired. It was bad enough when I got divorced but now that the damn psychic was dating O'hara. He was reaching for the door when he heard a loud crash. He rushed into the building.
"Anyone here?" He yelled as he drew his gun.
"Shit! Sorry we're closed," hollered a feminine voice from behind the counter.
"You ok?"
A brunette popped her head out from behind the counter covered in what appeared like chocolate and caramel sauce. "Yeah just peachy keen." She sighed. "Well you're already in here so what can I get for you?"
"Umm maybe I'll just go. You look like you're having some problems at the moment."
"Just tell me what you want. I haven't even started cleaning the machines. The shelf here broke and now I'm practically a diabetic's worst nightmare thanks to my shitty ass shelves and uncapped bottles. So what'll it be? Soy latte or just a plain black coffee like all the cops on tv get. Oh and you can put your gun away ya know. I don't think that a chocolaty caramel mixture is gonna kill you."
Lassiter looked a bit sheepish as he sheathed his gun. "Sorry about that. I'm a bit jumpy. Detective Carlton Lassiter." He held his hand out. The brunette looked at his hand and laughed as she held up her sticky hands. "No can do. Sorry detective but you still haven't told me what you drink. But using my feminine intuition I'm feeling something sugary!" She laughed again and said, "was I right?"
"Oh are you psychic now?" Lassiter growled. She looked taken aback from his aggression. "Noooooo but I'm guessing you have a vendetta against the whole psychic community. Did Sylvia tell you that your aunt hated you or something? You know what never mind. I'm just gonna make you a cup of caffeine and you can do what you want with it. But you might want to chill out. You're being kinda creepy in a weird protective way."
The detective looked down. "Sorry it's just been a long day. One coffee with three creams and four sugars please. And I really do apologize. Do you want any help fixing the shelf?"
The woman looked at him and tilted her head and smiled. "For a grump you sure do have beautiful eyes. One extra-large coffee to tide off the nice detective until he gets home coming right up! And thanks for the offer but I can just go buy another shelf. I just suck at reading the directions and putting it together, probably why it broke." She laughed and then looked at him seriously as she made him coffee. "Thanks for the offer but you might be some weirdo trying to steal my secret coffee ingredients." She winked at him. "I grind the beans!"
Lassiter looked surprised as she pushed his money back when she handed him the coffee. "On the house. First ones are always free! I'm like a drug dealer! You're gonna get hooked!" She looked at the detective in horror when she realized what she said. "Not that I'm a drug dealer or anything! I mean you have your caffeine junkies but that's not the same! They can stop anytime they want and caffeine's not a crime, well maybe to the Mormon's but I'm totally making a fool of myself. Please just take the coffee before I have to put my other foot in my mouth!"
Lassiter laughed as she finished. "I'll definitely be back. Haven't laughed this hard in a while." He waved as he walked out the door.
Both thought to themselves, I am so STUPID!
