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Saturday, 11:45 a.m.

Josh Lewis was sure he'd thought of everything.

He had, after all, had a year to consider all the ramifications of the plan he'd outlined to Reva.

But now, as he stepped out of H.B.'s classic truck near the lighthouse, he realized the truck might have been a bad idea. He'd brought it because she'd admired his striking a macho pose with it. And it would be suitable for transporting some of her belongings; but it couldn't accommodate a car seat for her toddler.

Damn! On top of the mistake I made a year ago...

When he'd asked her to meet him here and go away with him, he hadn't thought to say that he meant the invitation to include her baby son.

He was sure she'd taken that for granted; she knew he loved Colin. But still, I should have said it. Emphasized it. And now, my coming in a vehicle where she won't be able to use a car seat will make it look as if I forgot about him.

Well, he had briefly forgotten, hadn't he?

He made a mental promise to Colin. If your mother gives me the chance, I'll make it up to you...son. I'll do my damnedest to be the best surrogate father you could possibly have.

He knew his oversight wasn't a fatal error, since he really did love and want the child, and Reva would understand that. But it made him nervous. Might there be other things he hadn't thought of?

Not likely, he told himself wryly. He'd lain awake for more nights than he cared to remember, envisioning possible outcomes of the plan he'd set in motion.

Wondering if he'd made a mistake, in committing himself to stay away for a year.

And always, always, yearning for the woman he was finally about to see. In only fifteen minutes...

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He left the truck, and walked slowly toward the lighthouse. Imagining their meeting.

She might not come at all. But he didn't think that was likely. It would imply that she never wanted to see him again. And that was unrealistic, when they already shared one grandchild, and there might someday be more.

He knew, though, that when they met and talked, there'd be not one, but two, "elephants in the room."

Jeffrey O'Neill and Edmund Winslow.

He'd decided he wouldn't mention them unless she did.

But on one point, he was sure. Even if she agreed to leave with him, and they eventually remarried, she'd never be truly his in the way she once had been. The way he'd dreamed she would be again.

And I have no one to blame but myself...

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Reva and Jeffrey had known each other for years without falling in love.

He didn't doubt that by the time they married, both of them had truly believed they were in love. But they'd only drifted together, and become that close, because he'd hurt Reva by marrying her sister.

Yes, she'd married his brother and his father. But that had been a lifetime ago, when they were young and foolish. He'd been in his forties, the father of grown children - Reva's children! - when he married Cassie. There was no comparison, no excuse.

Nevertheless, he still believed that if Reva and Jeffrey's marriage had gotten off to a humdrum, uneventful start, it wouldn't have lasted.

Jeffrey had never seemed like the domestic type. He'd postponed the wedding several times. He'd finally gone through with it; but when the novelty of "playing house" with a wife wore off, he might have strayed.

And Reva was no saint. If he, Josh, had flattered her by continuing to pursue her, undeterred by the wedding ring on her finger, she might have been the first to "stray."

But those critical early months of the marriage hadn't been uneventful. The newlyweds had faced daunting crises: Reva's unexpected, risky late-life pregnancy, and her return bout with life-threatening cancer. Jeffrey had risen to the challenge and proved himself the ideal partner, a tower of strength for her.

The ordeals they'd weathered as a couple, and the baby they shared, deepened their love. Made the marriage rock-solid. I know in my heart that after all that, it would have endured - even with me making a pest of myself, and Jeffrey sometimes making the mistake of overreacting.

Now Jeffrey was gone. But however deeply Josh believed Reva was his soulmate, he'd have to live with the fact that her marriage to Jeffrey hadn't been an aberration. Hadn't been a "mistake" that could be put behind her and all but forgotten, like her long-ago marriage to Buzz Cooper. No, it was something unique in her experience: a happy marriage cut off suddenly, shockingly, by her husband's death while they were still blissfully in love.

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He sat on the lighthouse steps, and allowed himself a few moments to look around. To drink in the beauty of this tranquil bit of Springfield Township - where the grass seemed greener and the air purer than anywhere else, and the only sounds were the chirping of birds and the rustling of leaves in the breeze.

It would have a calming effect on anyone.

Would it also make anyone - specifically, Reva - unwilling to leave?

He put that thought, and the scenery, firmly out of his mind. Gazed, instead, down at his hands as he reviewed ways the memory of Jeffrey might impact his and Reva's lives.

She might have decided she couldn't accept another man as a life partner, now or ever. In that case, she'd probably try to let him down gently.

A year ago, I would have been sure her turning me down would be a huge mistake. A mistake for her, and for Colin. But now, I'm not so sure I can presume to know what's best for them.

She might say she didn't feel able to have sex with him, at least not yet - felt, however illogically, that she was still married to Jeffrey. But she'd go with him, if he could accept her as just a "companion."

Yes, I'd accept that. But it would break my heart.

A much worse possibility: She might go with him, intending to have a sexual relationship - and find, when the time came to actually do it, that she couldn't. Perhaps, when they reached a motel, she'd break down completely, and demand that he turn around and take her home!

Even the best of scenarios - in which she went with him, and sex came easily and naturally - might conceal pitfalls.

What if, years down the road, she slips up while we're making love and calls me by his name? Will I wonder, then, if she's always been thinking of him?

My God. If I'm worrying about that now, will I always be suspecting it - rightly or wrongly?

It can be harder to compete with a dead rival than with a living one...

And Jeffrey hadn't died of natural causes, or in an accident that could have befallen anyone. He'd died a hero, risking everything to protect Reva and her family. The fact that Edmund had succeeded in killing him didn't diminish what he'd done; Edmund's wealth had stacked the odds heavily in his favor.

Not only had Jeffrey died a hero, he'd died in his prime.

When I'm a wrinkled, toothless old man, the Jeffrey Reva sees in her dreams will still be strong, handsome, and virile. And in love with her.

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In a different way, Edmund also posed a threat to his finding happiness with Reva. He planned to present the idea of their driving off together, headed for parts unknown, as an "adventure." But in reality, he was afraid Edmund would target them if they stayed in Springfield, and he learned they'd reconciled.

Did Reva understand that? Or would she, in time?

If so, would she lose respect for him because he'd chosen to flee rather than fight? Would he come off badly by comparison with Jeffrey, even though Jeffrey's standing up to Edmund had gotten him killed?

It always comes back to Jeffrey, doesn't it?

This I know: If we're together thirty years from now, Jeffrey will still be a third presence in the bed with us. Even if I'm the only one keeping him there.

But in spite of that...I want her. I want to try to make her, and Colin, happy.

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And he held out hope for their future. A hope based on the last memory he had of her, standing outside the house that had once been a symbol of their love, as he drove away.

He couldn't recall what she'd been wearing, or how her hair had looked.

But he was sure the last expression he'd seen on her face was...hope. She'd truly hoped that in a year's time, she'd feel able to begin a new life with him.

And now, God willing, she would.

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He looked up and saw her walking toward him - still some distance away, across the road. Colin was with her. A good sign, he told himself. If she meant to turn him down, and thought that might prompt an argument, she probably wouldn't have brought the child.

Or was he grasping at straws?

He got to his feet and walked to meet them.

Coming closer, he found that this time, he couldn't read her expression.

He was surprised, and a trifle puzzled, by her attire. She wore a long dress - solid dark green, save for a band of lighter green around the bottom. Low-cut and sleeveless, it was almost a sundress - a risky choice, in mid-September. But its texture gave the impression of heaviness.

It wasn't flattering, in the conventional sense. It made her look matronly.

And yet, there was something about it...its hues blended, as if by design, with the grass that surrounded her on all sides. The plunging neckline showed her cleavage, emphasizing her femininity. Not the vixenish femininity of her youth, but something more elemental...

He suddenly realized that she looked like a goddess. Some archetypal earth-mother goddess, the "mother" aspect enhanced by the fact that she led a toddler by the hand.

That insight struck him speechless.

Then the moment passed, and as they met, she was once again his childhood sweetheart, the woman who'd given him the best years of her life - borne his children, shared his joy in their grandchild.

He bent down and exchanged a playful "not-so-high five" with Colin - who seemed puzzled, but not afraid or unhappy. Straightening, he smiled at Reva and said, "I wasn't sure you'd be here."

She too was smiling. "Yes, you were."

But he sobered quickly at her next words. "You knew I was going to show up. What you don't know is what I'm going to say..."