I don't own any of the InuYasha characters. And I'm Banana Rum's friend, not the actual person.

"Kikyo," Kaede proclaimed. "This walnut's name is now Kikyo."

"Now Kaede dear," said a voice, "Let's not be silly. This is a walnut, not a jewel-protecting, shrine-guarding, demon-slaying, in-love-with-a-hanyou priestess."

"You're wrong, Mommy!" Kaede insisted. "She's my sister."

"Kaede! Be reasonable. This is a walnut, not a living creature. I'll take you to the pet shop tomorrow, and…"

"No, mommy, this is my pet walnut," Kaede insisted.

"Really, dear. Go to bed now." Her mother looked irritated. "I'll take care of your, erm, sister."

"Ok, fine." Kaede handed over the walnut. "Remember, her name's Kikyo."

"Errr, alright. Say good night to Kikyo."

"G'night!"

Meanwhile, a few miles away, an eggplant named Kikyo yawned and stretched her legs—that is to say, if eggplants could yawn, and if eggplants had legs, she would have, but as eggplants don't have legs or mouths, Kikyo the Eggplant didn't actually do any of the aforementioned.

But anyway, Kikyo just lay there, wishing she could yawn and stretch her legs—although, of course, eggplants don't have brains—when suddenly, a giant hand stretched down and picked her up.

"YAAAAH!" Kikyo screamed—but then she remembered, eggplants can't scream, and then she realized, eggplants can't remember or realize anything—to no avail, as no one could hear her anyway, as eggplants can't scream.

"Hi," said the person. "I'm Kaede. Your name will be Kikyo from now on."

The girl beamed and strode toward a small, shabby hut, with Kikyo in her palm.

"Oh no, not another one?" an older woman groaned as Kaede entered the hut.

"Yes," said Kaede. She reached over and put Kikyo on a shelf, next to a walnut and a grapefruit.

A few feet away from where the eggplant had been lay a pear named Kikyo. It sighed—but let's not go over the whole not-having-a-mouth thing. Anyway, it was happily rolling around, playing some weird, pear-ey mind game, when suddenly a dark figure loomed over it.

"Hi, I'm Kaede. I'm going to name you Kikyo…"

Which one is the real Kikyo? I would have guessed the grapefruit, had not a woman in a red skirt with a bow and arrow cam around the corner just then and blasted an arrow into the cottage.