She came out of the bathroom, eyes downcast, head drooping. Sasha noticed it immediately from their bed.
"Summer?" he questioned.
She didn't answer.
"Summer, what's wrong? What is it?"
She didn't look up. She let out a sniff, and mumbled something unintelligible.
Sasha, now alarmed by her behavior, got out of bed and hurried to her side. "Darling, I didn't understand…"
"I started my period, OK?" Summer said harshly, louder than she intended. Sasha flinched at the sound of her tone but did not move from her proximity. He exhaled, and placed his large hands on her shoulders, kissing her forehead. "Oh my love…" he murmured. Summer turned out of his attempted embrace and sat on the edge of the bed, her mid length blonde hair hanging down around her pale face now red , which was now streaked with tears.
She was so certain she had been pregnant, and was beyond thrilled. All the symptoms were there- nausea, cravings (surprisingly for pickles and milkshakes), and exhaustion. She had been late with her cycle as well. They had been trying for the last three months to get pregnant, and had always ended up disappointed. For the past three weeks they lived in a sort of baby euphoria, looking up pregnancy information, thinking of possible names, and thinking who this little one would look like more. They would snuggle together just before falling asleep, with Sasha spooned up against Summer's back, his hands on her still flat tummy, rubbing lovingly until they fell asleep.
And now that joy was gone.
Summer began to sob. Sasha immediately sat next to her, but she moved away. "I can't…" Summer choked out between sobs "…do this."
"Do what?" Sasha asked gently.
"I can't handle this….this disappointment….it's too hard…." She hiccupped "I keep letting you down…." She continued her tears.
Sasha suddenly moved closer to her, picking up his wife's small frame and settling her in his lap. He turned her so he could see her face which she kept downcast. He lifted her chin with his hand, until he could see her blue eyes, puffy and sad, but still so beautiful. "Summer, you have never let me down, nor will you ever….believe that" he spoke firmly. He took her small hand, enveloping it in his own, and placed it over his heart. "You have owned this since the day we met. I gave it to you. When you hurt, I hurt." He tenderly cupped her face in his hands, and placed another long kiss to her forehead. He spoke gently into her ear. "I know you're disappointed that we don't have our baby right now, but we will…we will…"
"When?" Summer asked. She again bowed her head, touching it to his forehead. "When will we.."
"In time…when the time is right it will happen " Sasha whispered.
Summer let out a slight laugh, but her tears abated. Sasha sat with her on the end of the bed, forehead to forehead, until he noticed her becoming sleepy. He said nothing, but set to work removing her light purple nightgown from her body. Summer did not question this. They always laid skin to skin for comfort when one another was sad or stressed out. It was therapeutic and healing for them both.
Sasha stripped down to his boxers and lifted his wife in his arms. He placed her higher up in the bed and she immediately laid on her stomach. Sasha scooted closer to her, wrapping his arm around the silken skin of her back. He lightly caressed the skin there, whispering comforting words softly into her ear until she again fell into sleep.
