Disclaimer: I'm only saying this once: I DON'T OWN LEGEND OF ZELDA OR FIRE EMBLEM!!!
Ok, so credit for co-authoring this story (as in spouting ideas, giving me feedback, and encouraging me) goes out to rasengirl13 and jakebob13. Bestest buddies Nayru could ever ask for. She loves you forever.
Yeah, so for this story I screwed around with the worlds of Fire Emblem and Zelda to make it more exciting. Like, all the lands from the series are molded together into the worlds of Fire Emblem and Hyrule. For instance, this is post-TP, but I included Ritos. Don't like? Don't read. Don't flame.
So, the events from real games are kind of completely irrelevant to this. This is MarthxZelda and there's nothing you can do about it, since it gets too crossover-y to put in the SSB section. I would have done that if I could have.
This was intended only for my two best friends. I wasn't even planning on posting this. If no one likes it or if no one says they like it, I'll delete it eventually.
Without further pointless ranting by this authoress, let the insanity begin!
Chapter One: When the Hell did that Toilet Become Magical?!
Ike was staying at his friend Marth's castle in Altea. The two were going to have a wonderful adventure. They would figure out what it would be once they got on the road.
Ike was busy polishing Ragnell, his divine sword. Marth was ready, except for one thing...
"Hey Ike, I'm gonna go take a shit before we leave."
Ike looked up, clearly exasperated. "Thanks for sharing. Why don't you invite me upstairs to watch while you're at it?"
"Sorry, sorry!" Marth held his hands up and went to heed nature's call.
What happened next, Marth swore he'd never tell anyone, ever. He was finished using the toilet when he fell in. However, it wasn't wet, because Marth found himself falling through a sort of vortex in a very....awkward way. It may have been vanity, but any worries about what was happening were pushed out of Marth's head until he had pulled his pants back up and nervously adjusted himself into a more princely position for falling through vortexes. He could see ground and what looked like stone coming closer and closer and closer and clos-
BOOM.
Marth crashed into a wide field, and rolled down a hill. He miraculously dodged bits of old stone in the ground that looked like they were from ruins, but as the hill became level ground, he skidded to a stop on a flat, intact piece of stone, otherwise unblemished unless he had left skid marks. If he didn't altogether ruin it. Bloody, bruised, broken, and various other adjectives beginning with B, the Altean prince fell unconscious from the tumble.
An hour later, Hyrule's two princesses, Zelda and Adlez, were walking around on the upper levels of the temple's ruins. Zelda, the firstborn, was a brunette with blue eyes. Her younger twin Adlez was a blonde with brown eyes. Someone in Castle Town had reported a crash, but so far the princesses' search for the source had proved fruitless.
Adlez was currently chattering to Zelda.
"So, Zelda, do you like Link?"
"Adlez, for Din's sake NO! How many times do I have to repeat myself?!"
"Fifty-three and a half...."
".....Whatever. Anyway, you know Link and Midna like each other."
Adlez wasn't looking at, or listening to, her older twin. She was staring at the ground far below them, at a stone slab that lay at the bottom of Hyrule Temple's ruins. Zelda was standing under a sort of archway and turned to Adlez when she failed to reply. "What, Adlez?"
"There's a bloody dude down there!" Adlez said, much too happily to fit her statement, yet she began jumping down the platforms to the ground. She stopped at the last one and waited for Zelda to catch up. Adlez pointed at the man.
"Down there! He's hurt!" She informed Zelda and the brunette landed beside her.
No shit, Captain Obvious, Zelda thought. All she said aloud was, "Who is he?"
"Down there! He's hurt!" A female voice called.
Marth stirred motionlessly, feeling aches and pains all over. At least someone had found him.
"Who is he?" he heard a second girl asking the first.
Marth had a very limited point of view, lying on his side, level with the ground, and being able to see out only one uninjured eye. Someone landed in front of him. The figure was wearing a purple-white dress. Behind the first, another figure landed, this one wearing a pink-white dress. He couldn't see higher than their knees, and that was when he craned to see.
The one in the purple-white dress knelt beside him. He caught a view of a purple top to the dress and purple-white gloved hands before the girl rolled him over onto his back as gently as she could. Then she looked down at him. She had absolutely gorgeous shining blue eyes and brown hair, which had a warm, rich tone. Her eyes widened, and she gasped. Then she closed her mouth and winced, sucking in air through her teeth. "What the hell happened?" She muttered, looking off to the right where her companion was. "Give him fairy tears or something!" she ordered.
Her friend could be heard muttering, "Damn, four freshly caught fairies and I have to heal some random guy..."
The brunette moved aside to let the girl in the pink dress heal him. She looked so much like the brunette that even confused as he was, Marth knew they were most likely sisters. However, Pinky had blonde hair, and warm brown eyes that had reddish undertones. Despite the irritation she had conveyed, she didn't seem all that annoyed; her face had a neutral expression.
The girl reached somewhere, and revealed a bottle. Through his one good eye, Marth saw a shining orb of pink-magenta light with wings, floating up and down in the bottle. This, he assumed, was a fairy, though he had never seen one before. The girl pulled off the bottle's stopper and held the neck downwards over his chest. The fairy, sensing freedom, floated out the opening. Sensing Marth's injured state, it flew over his chest and face, scattering shining dust, until it...vanished. He felt his ribcage repairing itself and his face becoming less painful. The blonde repeated the process with his broken arms and legs.
Fully cured and revitalized, Marth stood up to thank the two girls, who he immediately decided must be fraternal twins.
"Thank you, fair damsels," he said in his most princely-like tone. "I am Prince Marth and I," he grabbed the hilt of his sheathed sword, "am from," he unsheathed it, "FIRE EMBLEM!!!" He thrust his brilliant blade into the air, where the tip caught the sun's rays and sparkled.
The brunette smiled. OH. MY. GODDESSES. SO HOT!!!!!!
The blonde stared, expression neutral. NO ANOTHER LUNATIC I'VE ALREADY PUT UP WITH THE POSTMAN TODAY!!!
The brunette grinned expectantly and said, "Well, Marth, we," she crouched a little bit, "are from Hyrule!" She spun in a circle, which would have been elegant except for the fact that a blue energy crystal had surrounded her and split outwards into shards as she spun. Marth was thrown back. "OW!!" he yelled. (Don't ask me why Zelda couldn't control her powers. For that one spell, that one time, she just couldn't.)
"Smooth, sis, way to win a guy. Assault him." Adlez whispered to Zelda. Zelda ignored her sister and ran over to Marth. "I'm sorry! Are you OK?" she cried. Adlez walked behind her and pulled the guy to his feet. "Sorry," she said to Marth, "my sister is excitable around guys she thinks are hot. My name is Adlez, and my sister apparently is Sorry."
The brunette had started losing patience when Adlez had said "hot guys", and now she yelled, "My name is ZELDA! I'M the firstborn, I get the Household name! The Family had to actually THINK of a name for you!"
The blonde responded quite calmly. "Well, Adlez is an awesome name. It doesn't surprise me that you're so jealous that you tried to come up with a new name for yourself. At least you remembered that we live in Hyrule and not Holodrum or something."
At this, Zelda's remaining patience snapped in half and she began chasing Adlez around with balls of lightning magic in her hands. Damn Adlez and her being-faster-than-me-ness! Zelda thought as she chased the blonde, never catching up. Marth just watched them nervously and scratched his head awkwardly.
When the magical twins calmed down, Marth asked them, "I was wondering, could you two help me find my way back to Fire Emblem?"
"No," Zelda said way too quickly. Marth and Adlez looked at her. Damn, Zelda thought, I can't just say he's hot and that I want him to stay! Luckily, Zelda had a true excuse. "We don't know where Fire Emblem is. No one does, I think."
Adlez nodded, partially aware of Zelda's train of thought and sort of chipping in to help her. "The only know lands beyond Hyrule's mountains are Termina, Koholint, Holodrum, and Labrynna. Beyond that is sea. I don't think anyone who's gone on has come back."
But Zelda remembered something true. Link had sailed the Great Sea, but he had not mentioned a Fire Emblem. "Link has! Let's go find him!...Where is he anyway?"
"Probably warping all around Hyrule for the hell of it with Midna," Adlez said in an irritated tone, which surprised Zelda. "Let's just go home and wait for them to come back." Zelda, Adlez, and Marth left the ruins of Hyrule Temple, Adlez leading and Marth following with Zelda next to him. Zelda answered the questions Marth was asking with Adlez sometimes chipping in. As they approached the castle, they began telling Marth the history of Hyrule. Marth almost fell backwards at the huge entrance hall, at least three stories tall, with various balconies, doorways, hallways, stairways, and statues filling the huge cathedral-like room. The three had made themselves comfortable on a huge red sofa when, half and hour later, a soldier walked in and said, "Your Highnesses! Sir Link has returned with the Twilight Princess, Midna!"
Link and Midna entered the hall walking side by side, but Midna was arguing with Navi about something, again. Today it was about Redeads and the best way to destroy them. The moment Adlez saw Link, she started yelling and abusing the poor young Hylian with Din's Fire. "Link, you IDIOT! You never take me anywhere and we never kick Bulbin ass! IT'S NOT FAIR! I want to go places too! Finding hidden meaning to Triforce lore gets old when you do it all day, every day! EVEN WEEKENDS!"
Poor Link was singed in multiple places, and Adlez had given up on magic and was pounding the hero mercilessly.
"Adlez!" Link whimpered in pain, "I can't let you go into danger! You're a princess!"
Adlez screamed in frustration. "Midna's a fucking princess too! And I'm not exactly weak or defenseless! AND, I can always become Sheik!" the refined princess shouted. Zelda, Midna, and Navi were watching in amusement. Marth was cowering behind Zelda.
Link tried to pacify Adlez before she whipped out the Light Bow. "All right, Adlez! Next time Midna and I go traveling you can come too!"
Adlez clapped her hands and jumped up and down. "Yay!"
Zelda noticed Marth clutching her shoulders, cowering behind her. She internally thanked Adlez for this random spazzy moment. "It's alright, Marth! Adlez is just like that," Zelda said, trying to comfort the disturbed visitor.
"Who's Marth?" Link, Midna, and Navi looked to see Zelda conjuring water to dump over the head of a princely-looking guy who looked like he was in coma, except that his eyes were open and one lid was twitching.
Marth spent a few minutes recovering. Afterwards, Zelda led the way to a nice dining room, because the first thing that had come out of Marth's mouth was that he was hungry. Everyone sat at the table but Navi, who floated around Link's head. Only Marth ate. He felt awkward, but the Hyruleans said that they just ate later and they hadn't heavily injured themselves that day, so he shouldn't feel weird. Marth began recounting his tale:
"I am Marth, the Prince of Altea, from the land of Akaneia, in the world of Fire Emblem. My friend Ike and I were going to embark on an adventure. We were ready to go, so I went upstairs to get my sword and its sheath, when I fell through what could only be called a vortex. After landing in a field and having a less than enjoyable roll to the ruins, I met Zelda and Adlez, who helped me recover. As I am sure Ike is worried about me and anxious to get onto our journey, I must find a way home soon."
Zelda turned to Link. "If he fell through space a great distance, he might have come from beyond Hyrule's borders, from the Great Sea.. We were wondering if you had ever heard of Fire Emblem in your travels."
Link shook his head. "no one in the known inhabited islands has ever heard of it. But we can search for this land."
"Wait," said Midna, "If he fell through a vortex, then I think that even if we traveled the entire world, we would never find Fire Emblem. A vortex would be more likely to travel between dimensions, like Hyrule and Twilight. Portals warp you, not vortexes."
"So, how do we help? There is no mirror to Fire Emblem," Adlez said.
"First, we look throughout Hyrule's land and history for anything remotely connected to what we are trying to find. Then, we could try the rest of the land, but that is a daunting task. I suppose we could attempt to create a vortex..." Midna said.
"But so many things could go wrong!" Zelda said. "Will the portal exist like the Mirror? How do we make a vortex if it's even possible? If we managed to create one, would it be safe to use? Would it work? We don't even know why this vortex opened in the first place. In the worst case scenario, it would be Ganondorf's work."
"We can still search for a vortex, and, if one exists, find it," Midna said.
"Well, it's settled for me. Me and Midna...and Adlez," Link added as he got a death glare from Adlez, "will search Hyrule-country and Twilight."
Adlez had an idea. Leave Marth and Zelda alone together. Fun!
"Yay! Let's go!" said Adlez. Without waiting, she grabbed Link and Midna and almost dragged them out of the room by their arms. Navi flew out behind them.
"Wait!" Zelda called as the door slammed. "What about...us.....Great.... what are we supposed to do?"
Marth was thrilled that the Hyruleans were so open to helping him. "Well, if the vortex is still by the temple, we could examine it," he suggested. "And if it's not there, we could take care of the research while Link and Midna and Adlez look around Hyrule"
Neither knew it, but the prospect of working together, just the two of them, made both internally yell, YES!!!
As it was, Zelda smiled warmly and Marth. "Good idea. Alright then, to Hyrule Temple."
Well, what did you think? Like it? Think I suck? Screw you. Review, constructively criticize, just don't flame.
Yes, Adlez is an OC. The only OC I'm including. Bear with it.
And just a reminder from the beginning of the chapter, this is stupidity that really isn't based off any game in the series. Because, yes, I know, MarthxShiida, blah blah blah, but the inspiration for this story was random MarthxZelda-ness from SSBB
Next time, we will see Adlez, Link, Midna, and Navi run all over Hyrule, and come face to face with someone presumed dead. Fun.
If you do not review, your stomach acid will turn into Diet Coke and anything you eat will turn into Mentos. :)
