Disclaimer: All characters and the setting belong to J.K. Rowling, this is only a fan fiction and I will not be receiving any kind of profit from it.
Authors note: This fan fiction takes place after the sixth book, so I'm pretty sure its full of spoilers from then on, just a bit of warning. ;
This is a re-write of a story, and hopefully I'll keep up with this since it's three years old or something and I hadn't touched it. Now this story is a shipper, so its obviously going to be a little out of character. If you don't like it, please don't say anything. If you do comments are highly appreciated! If you have any ideas on where you'd like to see the story go, don't be afraid to tell!
- - -
He couldn't believe it. Going back was the last thing he wanted to do, the last thing he imagined doing.
Clearly in his mind he could recall deciding that he wouldn't be returning to Hogwarts. Never would it feel as safe as it once did; Not without Dumbledore. Most students were wary of coming back. Where they felt safe in previous years, they did not anymore. The common knowledge that 'Dumbledore was the only wizard that Voldemort feared' was crushed with his death. Now that security was gone.
Harry didn't doubt that McGonagall would make a good head mistress. It just wasn't the same. It was absolute that his classmates felt similar. Harry decided this as he watched them through the window of the the Hogwarts Express. The platform was unusually quiet. The chaos and chatter he had grown to love was gone, and parents almost seemed frightened to let their children go. Harry wondered if the parents felt as though there was a chance this would be the last time they would see their children alive.
As far as cheer went it was only in friends reunited, happy to see the other was well, other wise a somber hush hung over their heads. Even the world seemed a little melancholy, Harry stared out the window noting that the sky was wearily overcast. The whole world seemed muted in hue, not one color standing brightly against the rest, it didn't help that the window had a slight film, making it dingy and rather difficult to peer through. Small droplets of condensation-reminiscent of the parents tears-collected around the rim.
His gaze filtered over to Hermione, who had fallen asleep half way through the ride, with her tired copy of Hogwarts; A History in her lap. Ron was beside her-also asleep- with a few pumpkin pasties wrappers at his feet and a half eaten chocolate frog in his hand.
Harry was happy at least to have them. If Ron and Hermione's parents had refused their return he would have been devastated. It was one thing for half the school to not come back, but an entire other for his best friends to leave him twiddling his thumbs.
The past summer was bleak, it was the last one he had to spend with the Dursley's. Harry had still been mourning over the loss of Dumbledore, so when it came to he didn't even have the energy to protest or retaliate when his Uncle had bossed him or when Dudley decided to tease him.
Most days Harry had spent with his head pushed deep into his pillow just thinking of the year, recounting all of his steps and every moment he had spent with Dumbledore. Every now and again his thoughts would drift to the horcrux's. What they were, and what it meant for him. But in thinking he would realize how very screwed he was. Without Dumbledore's help and guidance he hadn't the slightest clue, and that pattern left him more depressed than when he started. Honestly, Harry was hoping that he'd be allowed to drop out of Hogwarts and join the order, but McGonagall had refused him. Informing him promptly that he would not be allowed to join the order if he did not finish his final year in Hogwarts. He tried to fight her, but to his dismay she was just as stubborn as he.
Two weeks into summer Harry sent an owl to Ron, close to begging to come to the burrow. Harry felt that privet drive was causing him more stress than he needed. Not to mention he hadn't the faintest clue of what was happening in the wizarding world and it drove him to his wits end.
So, Mr. and Mrs. Weasley agreed just as long as the Dursleys wouldn't mind him being picked up by way of floo. Uneasy at first, Uncle Vernon felt that he didn't want the wizard types coming in through his chimney again-but with convincing from Petunia, and the desire to be rid of Harry once and for all-he supposed that it would better then those oddities coming to the door; At least this way the neighbors wouldn't be able to see.
When Harry arrived at the Weasley's he was surprised to see Hermione. Usually she didn't show up until about a week before they left for school, but she explained that she felt she felt she was bringing danger to her family and it was in their best interest.
It seemed to Harry, that Ron and Hermione had grown closer over the break. They were all but snogging infront of him when time and prying eyes would permit. But he supposed in light of recent events they finally both realized how well they fit together, and how much comfort they could offer the other. At any rate Harry was happy for them. No longer have to listen to Ron complain in jealousy about Hermione writing letters to Krum.
Being around Ginny was rather awkward. The relationship they had shared the year before came as soon as it went. He and Ginny had left on the terms that Harry needed to concentrate on other matters than on the relationship. Ginny understood, but beneath it all Harry had other reasons for calling it off with her. It was true they got on well, but there was something missing for Harry. Something about the relationship just wasn't there, but Harry opted not to mention that. Slowly over the course of the vacation, he had grown to be just as friendly with her as when she was a child. He grew a more brotherly love and appreciation for Ginny. The Weasley home gave some comfort to Harry while he was there. No prying into details he didn't want to disclose, or forcing him to his room with out supper. It was a home away from home, the only place he felt rightly welcome besides Hogwarts. Fred and George popped in frequently when their shop was closed, and even Bill managed a visit or two. Percy only wrote letters to his family, never visited; and everyone expected as much.
But, that was gone now, that comfort inside of him twisted and grew into a heavy rock that tugged at his heart and weighed heavy in his belly. As Hogwarts became visible through the trees, a speck on the horizon, Harry felt that rock gain a bit of weight. This year would be like no other, and it pained Harry to imagine a sorting without the wistful smile and witty remarks from Dumbledore. Harry swallowed heavily and stood up.
"Ron, Hermione, be best better get our robes on, we aren't far." He said as though he were encumbered, to make himself sound as though he had also napped.
Hermione and Ron both woke, nodding. Hermione closed her book and place it on her seat as Ron picked up his wrappers. Harry was truly glad he had them, they seemed to be his only source of comfort now. The train pulled into the station just as Harry finished slipping into his robe.
Through a yawn Hermione managed, "The ride seemed pretty short this time around."
Harry laughed.
"Yeah well, it's a bit shorter when you're napping the whole way."
A little more laughter and exchange of jokes lifted their moods. Upon exiting the compartment they noticed something similar had taken hold of their classmates. Despite the solemn faces that boarded only hours ago, plenty of excitement had brewed. It had to have generated during the train ride, there was no doubt. The first years were bubbling with anticipation to be sorted, darting this way and that to get off the train. Ron almost got knocked over by an especially excited group of first years.
"Bloody hell!' Ron cried, Hermione and Harry looked back at him laughing.
Harry was glad to see the happy little faces. He too remembered wondering just what house you were going to be sorted into. How the anticipation was both scary and invigorating.
"Harry!"
The boy was so deep in through that it took Hermione more than a couple of shouts to grab his attention.
"Hurry up! All the carriages are about to leave!" Hermione nagged, referring of course to the 'horseless' carriages that took non-first years to the castle.
Just behind Hermione, Harry could see several of the buggies beginning to take off. In a fluster Ron struggled to find one that wasn't full with many failed attempts. To his great surprise he found one that was not only completely stationary, but possibly empty.
Ron stepped in first, Harry and Hermione stopping outside the carriage to catch their breath. It wasn't one second than he was in, that he was out, closing the carriage door behind him.
"We ought to find another one, Harry." Ron said sourly, his freckled face screwed up in disgust.
"Come again?"
Ron leaned in towards Harry "Malfoy is inside."
By now every other carriage had gone already and Harry was equally disgusted with the idea of riding with that little worm. It was only his lack of desire to walk the distance that made him respond with, "I think we haven't much a choice."
With one hand kept firmly on the door handle, Ron fought his urge to gag at the very thought of riding in the cart with Malfoy, but in thinking about walking the stretch was enough to force himself. He opened the door sitting on the opposite seat of Malfoy, the wrinkle in his nose giving away his already obvious discomfort.
Hermione, always the mediator, aimed to sit beside Draco, knowing that if one of the boys took the spot there might just end up being a fist fight. Just as she sat Ron cleared his throat, jealousy was overcoming him at the sight. Even though he knew Hermione wasn't choosing to sit beside Malfoy for pleasure he couldn't stand to see it. She glanced up at Ron catching his furious glance and just as Harry came in through the small door she switched sides, appeasing Ron who thankfully took his hand in her own.
Those silvery eyes darted to the small sign of affection, and without conscious effort his normal scowl masked his sharp features.
"Always knew the Mudblood and Weasel would get together." Draco said out loud, as though it were to no particular audience.
"Shut up, Malfoy! You insufferable git." Ron spat, Hermione shifting uncomfortably beside him.
Malfoy smirked, but the twist in his lips didn't last long; and in moments it had faded completely. His eyes drifted to Harry, who was sitting beside him, looking as though he couldn't get any closer to the wall of the carriage.
"I'm complimented Potter, I knew I was bloody gorgeous but I had no idea that you had to seat yourself so far away just to resist me." Draco remarked. Either he was trying his hardest to be irritating and tasteless or he was craving attention. Harry didn't want to cater to either.
"Sod off, Malfoy." Harry spat out his name like it was a sardine flavored 'Every Flavor Bean.'
"I never have wanted to sit by you in any instance, and especially now. I extremely loath to be in your company."
Harry hated Draco with every bone in his body. That slimy git was in Dumbledore's presence that night, wand raised, ready to kill. Malfoy had intended to kill Dumbledore! If that wasn't enough reason to loath Malfoy, then Harry didn't know what was.
It wasn't hard for Draco to figure out what Harry was implying. He may have been blond, but he wasn't dim. His lips parted as he attempted to redeem himself, but there was nothing he could say.
Draco himself was in a moral dilemma about it all. Under the pressure of his family feigned allegiance with the Dark Lord. His father years before beat into his mind that all wizards other than pureblood were nothing, and forced his complete thought pattern into his young and impressionable mind. At first, Draco trusted and revered his father. But years away from school helped the boy to learn a thing or two about control. He realized that his father wasn't teaching him; he was training him to be a servant of the Dark Lord. Something Draco knew he wanted no part of. It wasn't in his nature to serve,
let alone serve one who would as good as kill anyone who failed.
Never the less, Draco acted against his will out of fear. The confusion inside of him caused him to lash out at all those around him, even his friends. All his years he had been spiteful, and not without reason. At least he knew that no part of him wanted to serve the Dark Lord in. Nowhere within him was the desire to kill Dumbledore, and there had never been. Sure, he hated the man, for many reasons, but never had he wished him death. It was a thought that Draco buried deep within himself, never wishing to communicate with any other; so he thought.
Pale slender fingers folded, his nails biting into his palm with frustration. He didn't want to kill Dumbledore, and he didn't actually commit the crime!
"Oh, you wouldn't understand, Potter" Draco spat, eyeing the doors of Hogwarts out the window of the carriage.
As soon as the wheels stopped, Draco was out, leaving the three inside, stunned. Honestly, they had all expected a better comeback than that from Malfoy. He didn't curse them, he didn't yell, and he didn't draw his wand. His final comment seemed so out of place that it left them all confused, brows knitted. In their silence and hesitation Ron said something that hit them all a bit late.
"Why wasn't Malfoy in a carriage with Crabbe and Goyle?"
"Or even Pansy?" Hermione added.
It was peculiar all right, Draco without his goons. Not often would you ever see the blond boy without his towers of support, let alone without a single friend. It was down right suspicious.
"Perhaps they just got in some dumb spat. " Harry offered, rising to his feet. "We'll see him tomorrow, and they'll be at his side."
"And I'll wager that he'll be just as nasty as ever." Ron joked, following Harry who just left the carriage.
The three trotted up to the doors, following the mass into the great hall, which was decorated just as finely as any year before. Harry sat beside Hermione, across from Ron. Neville plopped down just beside them, and soon enough the entire gang was together, smiles lingering on their faces as they caught up about quidditch and the like.
They would all make the best of it, even if Dumbledore wasn't there, it was their last year after all; their last chance.
Another conversation started up quickly, and Harry withdrew his attention. Thinking faintly of Malfoy. His green eyes caught the head of white blond hair rather quickly, and noted oddly enough that Draco wasn't really paying any mind to his normal gang, though they were avidly trying to talk to him. The scowl seemed permanently etched into Draco's strong features, his arms crossed over his chest; making him look rather reserved and out of place⦠So unlike Malfoy, who usually would have been making himself the center of attention by now.
Harry shook his head, cursing himself for wasting his thoughts over Draco. His green eyes filtered to the head table, he was curious to see who took up the new positions in the school.
One person he was pleased-no-astonished to see. The friendly weathered face of Remus Lupin had returned. He sat just beside Professor Flitwick who was chattering off the tired ears of an old friend. It made Harry so pleased to see Lupin, there were just no words to express how he felt. It seemed the Order was growing within Hogwarts' halls.
Sitting where Snape had sat for six years was a face he didn't recognize at all. It was a pruney unforgiving-looking old woman. It seemed Snape's replacement would be as fun as he had been.
Gazing back at those around him, Harry smiled. It was good to see them again, at this moment he felt as though Voldemort's return was no more than a bad dream. The heavy heart that he carried with him always seemed to melt away if only for the evening.
He was home again.
