This is my first time uploading anything to and my first fanfic since 1998 (yes. I'm old..ish :) I'm big time out of practice, so hopefully this goes well! This takes place right after episode 4x08: Too Far Gone

Disclaimer: I don't own The Walking Dead or any of the following characters.

It had only been a few days since the attack on the prison and Michonne was doing what she did best; surviving. In the confusion and the carnage, she'd lost track of her group. Her group... It didn't sound like her. But like Rick had said that day, people can change. The time Michonne had spent at the prison reminded her of the needs she had pushed to the back of her mind. She'd missed relationships, having a sense of community, a family. These were luxuries that Michonne had convinced herself she could no longer afford in this new reality.

Her attempts to stay detached worked for awhile. Before she could remind herself not to, though, she began opening up to her fellow survivors. Not about her past, what she'd been through, of course, but she did begin to talk, to smile, even laugh. It felt good. It felt human.

Michonne had also found herself falling back into "mom mode". She and Carl had already grown close and despite trying to keep her distance, once she held Judith, Michonne couldn't help but adore her. No one could resist Judith for long.

Michonne had fallen in love with those kids…just as she had fallen in love with their fa…

"No", she thought to herself. "Not going there…I can't".

Now, she was alone again. It shouldn't have been a big deal; she'd been alone time after time and had been fine. But this time was different. She'd had people to care about, to protect. And now they were gone. Were Carl and Judith alive? …Was Rick?

She tried to shake him from her mind but it wasn't working. When she'd last seen him, he was so close to death. The Governor's hands were tight around Rick's neck and he had only seconds left. Seeing that piece of shit hurting Rick, killing him, only added to the hate she already harbored. Running her sword into the Governor's body had felt cathartic. It had given her the release she'd craved since Andrea's death.

Finally, he was dead. Even if she hadn't been the one who officially finished him off, she'd been the catalyst that led to his end. Michonne was satisfied with that.

She had reached the edge of the woods, finding herself in what looked like a residential area. Could some of the people from the prison have ended up here?

Michonne continued to walk; everything was quiet other than the sound of her boots hitting the pavement. There hadn't been any walkers recently, for which she was both grateful and suspicious. Entering a subdivision, her hand moved to her sword as a precaution. Houses meant possible shelter and supplies. They also meant a greater chance of encountering the undead. More than likely, she'd encounter decomposing residents still in their homes, wandering around in their robes and slippers, searching in vain for fresh meat.

A faint sound caught her ear, causing her to stop and try to figure out the origin. Advancing towards the sound, she was quiet and quick, ready to fight.

The closer she got, the more convinced it was a person she heard...a living one

Her felt her heart lift at the sight of Carl Grimes, who appeared to be baiting a couple of walkers towards something or away from something else. Michonne looked towards the house they were in front of. Was this where Rick and Carl had been holed up?

She prepared to step in but found it wasn't necessary. Once he had them where he wanted, Carl took both walkers out by himself. Michonne watched him in action, a definite feeling of pride bubbling up.

The battle was over, for now. She called softly to Carl, not wanting to startle him or attract more attention.

Carl looked up, a wide grin splitting his face. They ran to each other, embracing.

"I'm so glad you're here" he said, still smiling

"Me too. Have you found anyone else? Is Judy in the house?"

Carl looked at the ground, unable to meet her eyes. "We lost her. Dad and I found her car seat and it was empty…and bloody". His voiced cracked as he traced invisible circles with his shoes.

God, please….not the baby. Michonne remembered what Judith had done for her. She had helped Michonne regain a piece of her humanity. That little girl was beautiful and innocent. No one deserved this less.

"Are you sure?" she asked. Did you find...her?" She couldn't bear to use the word "body" in reference to Judith.

He shook his head; adjusting the sheriff's hat he had continued to wear after all this time.

"We never found her, but she has to be dead. There was so much blood…" Carl trailed off, squeezing his eyes shut in an attempt to block the memory.

Michonne could not, would not accept this.

"There was a lot going on. Someone might have grabbed her, Carl. And until I learn otherwise, we're looking for her", Michonne decided, refusing to accept this loss on top of all the others.

"We?" he asked looking up at her. "..Does that mean you're staying?"

Michonne gave him a little smile. "You couldn't get rid of me if you tried."

The relief on Carl's face was evident as he returned her smile.

Michonne looked around the area again. "Where's your dad?"

Carl's bright eyes dimmed a little. "He's in there," he said, motioning towards the door of the house.

"He's still hurt pretty bad. I thought…I thought he had died the other day."

The teen looked away at some invisible object in the distance, trying to hide the tears that refused to give him a break.

"He won't really talk, Michonne...he just sits there. I've been trying to take care of him but I don't know what to do."

Michonne put her arm around Carl and they started heading towards the front door. She gave his shoulder what she hoped was a reassuring squeeze.

"Well, you're not on your own anymore. I'll go talk to him," she said, opening the front door and closing it behind her.


The house was fairly pleasant under the circumstances. It looked like the former inhabitants had fled early on, probably towards one of the government "safe zones". Carl stood in entryway, seemingly unsure of what to do or where to go.

"He's in there," Carl said, motioning towards a closed door.

Michonne took a breath, her hand on the knob. She did her best to prepare herself for whatever she may find. "What if I can't help him?" she wondered. What if he's already gone?

She entered the room, taking everything in. As Michonne's eyes started to adjust to the dark, she saw him. Rick was half sitting, half lying on an old couch. His face was still swollen; the wounds he'd suffered were far from healed.

Walking slowly toward the couch, sat next to him, unsure of what to do next. Before she could do anything, a series of bad coughs erupted from Rick. She reached over, rubbing his back. His body, still so weak, convulsed under her hand. continued touching him, silently praying for his pain to stop.

The coughing fit mercifully subsided, allowing Rick to catch his breath.

"Rick, I.. "

"Don't", he interrupted. "Please…just don't." He sounded raspy, fragile. This wasn't the man, the leader she'd known before. He attempted to move away from Michonne, unwilling to accept her comfort.

Refusing to give in, Michonne continued to run her fingers over Rick's back, partly to sooth and partly to check for damage. They stayed that way for a few minutes, quiet and still.

"They'll never forgive me. I'll never forgive myself."

The words were so soft, Michonne wasn't sure she'd actually heard them.

"Maggie, Beth", Rick continued. "I'll never be able to look them in the eye. I screwed everything up. I failed…again. And this time, it cost Hershel his life".

She couldn't see his face. His curly, dark hair was hiding his eyes, but she knew he was crying.

"Hershel took us in, gave us shelter. Without him, none of us would have made it. And I couldn't save him, couldn't save Judith."

His voice started to break with his daughter's name. Michonne knew this pain more than Rick would ever know. She would do anything to take it away from him. Rick sniffled, wiping his eyes with the palms of his hands.

"They deserved so much better than me. I fuck up and everyone I love suffers for it. I hate what I've become."

Michonne felt her indignation start to rise at his words. How could Rick really think this was all his fault?

"That's Rick Grimes," she thought sadly. Take a tragedy that was beyond your control and beat yourself up for it. His body and his soul were both busted to pieces. Rick clearly didn't care if he lived or died at this point. She had to get through to him, to fix this. Losing him wasn't an option.

"Rick..."

Silence.

"Rick", she said with more force. "Look at me".

Michonne reached out, lifting his head, gently forcing it up. Slowly, he raised his face and met her eyes with his own. Her hand rested on his jaw, her thumb caressing it.

"You did not do this. This was all him. Not you...never you. Yes, you've made mistakes, just like everyone else. But your intentions were always honorable; keeping everyone together and safe."

She did her best to not tear up while looking at Rick. His beautiful blue eyes were rimmed with red from days of crying. Physically, he was badly damaged but that would heal. Emotionally, though, it was obvious he was destroyed. His heart, his spirit were broken in every sense of the word. Her heart ached for him.

"You are a good man. You are kind. You are strong. And you will come back from this." Michonne continued to caress him, as if her touch alone could bring him back from the brink.

"Carl told me about Judith. I don't think she's gone. We will find her. I'm not going to give up and you can't either," she insisted.

"How?" Rick's eyes looked somewhat hopeful. "We've got nothing. Everything we built up… everything is gone." Michonne shook her head.

"Not everything. We've got people out there we have to find. We've got to put our group...our family back together. We need each other, all of us. I learned that from you."

Rick managed a weak smile. "I'm glad… glad you're here," he said. "Me too," she answered.

Michonne pulled Rick's face close to her own. She had to do this now; who knows if there'd ever be another chance.

Their faces millimeters apart, Michonne could feel Rick's hot breath on her face.

"We can do this, Rick. Together." Her eyes closed and she moved in closer to his mouth.

"I love you," she whispered before lightly placing her lips on his.

Michonne's heart was pounding, anxiously waiting to see what he'd do. Moments later, she felt Rick's hand on the back of her head, his fingers tangled in her hair as pulled her to him.

She didn't know how long they kissed and she really didn't care. They'd earned this time together, however brief it turned out to be. Needing to catch her breath, Michonne reluctantly pulled away from Rick. He still looked damaged, but the tiniest spark of happiness had returned to his eyes. She couldn't ask for more.

Michonne sat up and motioned for Rick to scoot over. "Get over here, Grimes," she teased. He did and she lovingly laid his head in her lap. Michonne ran her fingers through Rick's hair while he relaxed, his breathing growing slower.

"You staying?" he asked quietly.

"For good," She replied.

"…Michonne..." he said sleepily.

"Mmm?

".. Love you, too."

Rick's body went slack as he fell into a contented sleep. Michonne smiled and relaxed as she felt herself drift off too.

The road ahead would be intense. They'd be starting over from scratch. Their friends…their family, was fractured, split in different directions. And then there was Judith. But for right now, for this moment, they were safe. They were happy. They were together.