Hi! So, I was thinking of some new good ideas since I ended my other story, Cahills Writing Fanfiction, and I thought about Cahill Spoofs! Hope you like it! Cheers!
I, iheartamianplusnatan, do not own the 39 Clues or Star Wars.
Cahill Spoofs
Star Wars
Cast List:
Amy: Producer
Dan: Luke Skywalker
Sinead: Princess Leia
Hamilton: Hans Solo
Nellie: Chewbacca
Ian: C-3PO (the gold, whiny British robot)
Jonah: Controls R2D2
Fiske: Obiwan Kenobi
Natalie: Darth Vader
-recording-
Amy: All right everybody, listen up. Nellie is passing out the cast lists.
Dan: Cool! I'm Luke Skywalker! I get a light saber!
Amy: Obviously , we're not giving you a real one. You'd be cut in half in two minutes. Not that I would be complaining…
Sinead: Princess Leia? Doesn't she wear a dress or something? And have little buns on the side of her head? I enjoy looking like a two year old as much as the next person, but why couldn't I have been the producer?
Amy: Easy. Because I didn't want to be Princess Leia.
Hamilton: Awesome! I'm Hans Solo! And he has a pet….something.
Nellie: Aaah! Chewbacca?! Really? Explain how you came up with that one.
Amy: Well, Chewbacca has the word "chew" in it. And you like to eat food, so…..
Nellie: When this is over, you are so dead.
Ian: I'm a robot? Honestly, Amy?
Dan: Well, it does fit your personality.
Ian: What?
Dan: You know. C-3PO is whiny, British, and covered in gold!
Ian: Daniel!
Jonah: Uh, Amy? You know that I know nothing about controlling robots, right?
Amy: Just try your best. How hard can it be?
Fiske: I will embrace my role as the great Jedi Master with open arms.
Jonah: You do know that he gets cut in half with a light saber, right?
Fiske: Gah!
Natalie: Darth Vader? Who the heck is Darth Vader?
Amy: You really don't know who Darth Vader is?
Natalie: Should I?
Amy: Um, well, he wants to kill Luke Skywalker, which is played by Dan, and-
Natalie: I'm in!
Amy: Alright everyone, places!
Luke(Dan) and Obiwan (Fiske) enter the bar to find a pilot. Hans Solo (Hamilton) and Chewbacca (Nellie) are sitting at a table
Hamilton: I'm…um…..
Amy: (whispers) Hans Solo.
Hamilton: Right! I'm Hans Solo, and I'm the Captain of the air ship. Chewie here tells me you're looking for passage to the Alderan system.
Fiske: Yes indeed. If it's a fast ship.
Hamilton: Fast ship? You've never heard of the…the….what was it called again?
Amy: Millennium Falcon.
Hamilton: Right! The Millentum Falcon!
Amy: Uuuuugh. (puts head in hands)
Fiske: Should I have?
Hamilton: Ummmm… (turns to Amy) Should he have?
Amy: (muffled noises due to her head being in her hands)
Nellie: Let's get this stupid scene over with so that I can get out of this ****ing Wookie costume!
Amy: Cut!
In the starship, Obiwan is trying to make Luke close his eyes and use the Force while trying to practice fencing with his new Light Saber.
Fiske: Luke, you must use the Force.
Dan: This…thing….is…so…hard….to….use!
Amy: Dan! Read from the script!
Dan: I'm pretty sure that this was the exact same thing that Luke was thinking, but he just wanted to look macho for the cameras, so he said something intelligent.
Fiske: Luke, close your eyes.
Dan: What the- ?
Fiske: Feel the Force.
Dan: Okaaaay…..
Fiske: Ow!
Dan: Did I get it?!
Fiske: You got my head!
Dan: Why isn't it falling off?
Amy: Because it's a fake Light Saber!
Dan: Ooooh! No wonder it wasn't running into stuff. Piece of junk! (throws it backstage)
Amy: Ouch! Dan!
Jonah: (from backstage) Uhhhhhh, Amy?
Amy: -acting completely irresponsibly, you-
Jonah: Amy WATCH OUT!
(R2-D2 comes flying out from backstage, running into things and causing mass havoc)
Amy: Jonah!
Jonah: Sorry. I kinda lost control of the remote.
Amy: Kinda?!
Jonah: Oh yeah, like you come up with all the great ideas. Just try your best, Jonah. How hard can it be?
Amy: Cut!
Dan: I'm Luke Skywalker, and I'm here to rescue you!
Sinead: (burst out laughing)
Sinead: This is just sooooo hilarious! You- rescuing- me! Ha! (keeps on laughing)
Amy: Sinead!
Sinead: But he's so tiny!
Dan: TINY!?
Amy: Dan, Sinead!
Dan: I'll show you who's tiny! (jumps on Sinead)
Amy: No, Dan no! Stop!
Dan: (takes out light saber) Take that! And that!
Amy: Dan, you're supposed to be rescuing her, not slicing her!
Sinead: Ahhh! Get it off me! It's like a burr or something!
Dan: Aaaaaaaaaarghhh!
Amy: Cut!
Amy: Ian, come on! It's your scene!
Ian: I am not going out in this hideous, preposterous, thing!
Amy: Ian, really? They can't even see your face!
Ian: You can't drag me on stage, even with a thousand horses!
Amy: Lunch Break!
Natalie: Luke, I must tell you something!
Dan: What?
Natalie: Luke, I am your father!
Dan: What?!
Natalie: Duh, it says it right here. (shoves script in Dan's face) Luke- I- am- your- father—wait, WHAT?!
Dan and Natalie: AAAAAAAAAAAH!
Amy: I think we can all agree that this was a bad idea.
Everybody: YES!
I hope you guys like it! I'll e coming out with a new chapter soon, so keep checking! Please review! Thanks!
Here are some questions. I'd be really thankful if you'd answer them for me:
1. What movie should I do next?
2. Should I add Phoenix to my cast list?
3. What would you change about this story? Anything to improve?
Thanks!
