I do not own ASOIAF. This is a joke story, that will contain smut, and is mainly written by me for fun. It shall be update at least once a month, likely more often, but I make zero promises.
Her Wedding was one of the most beautiful the realm had ever seen. It was not every day the King's brother and the maiden daughter of one of the realm's most powerful lords got married. The entire affair was a splendid mix of class and extravagance. The jealous look on Cersei Lannister's face was icing on the proverbial cake.
Even so, her marriage was a sham, and she knew long before the wedding it would be an unhappy arrangement albeit a beneficial one. It was good in a way, her husband being a pillow biter allowed her to have her freedom. She was allowed to have her share of squires and guardsmen warm her bed at night, and her handsome husband received her equally dashing brother. It was a fair trade.
Even so, she still couldn't help but cry on her wedding night, when her husband disappeared to sleep with her brother when they were supposed to be in bed together. Margery, ever the dutiful wife, covered for her husband. It was with tears in her eye Margaery cut her thigh with a kitchen knife, spilling her "maidens blood" on pristine white sheets She even faked cries of ecstasy, using her hand to simulate her husband and screaming to the heavens for all the perverts listening at the door.
Since that night, Margaery rarely spent any time with Renly if she could avoid it. On occasion, some godforsaken feast or tourney would force the two of them to endure one another's company. She could smile on his arm well enough, laugh at his sad attempts at humor, and even flirt with Renly when forced. They were the perfect couple to all the socialites who loved to gossip about their betters, and the only handful of people knew how unhappy their marriage was. In truth, Margaery's only grain of satisfaction from the situation came from a rather unfortunate reality. Every single couple in King's landing hated one another.
Robert and Cersei would kill one another at some point, she was sure of it. Margery's mother and father never talked to one another and only conversed when it was to boast about their happiness publically.
The Starks were well, and happy together, but the Starks were an anomaly in King's Landing anyway, never quite fitting in despite their defacto status as one of the most influential families in the seven kingdoms.
Still, it went without saying that she and Renly had a distant marriage, one in which they were fine seeing each other once every other week.
So it was a genuine surprise to wake up and discover her husband was looking for her. A servant informed Margaery that her husband was looking for her in the morning, which was a tad bit strange not in the least because she believed her husband did not know where her bedroom was. They would have shared a bedroom, but Margery imagined waking up next to her brother would make breakfast slightly awkward.
She made her way to her husband's Solar, wearing an ivy green dress of myrish silk embroidered with golden roses and grapevines. It left her shoulders bare and displayed an ample amount of cleavage that would tempt most men to dishonor. She loved such dresses, as it would make Cersei all too aware of her age, make Sansa gush at its intricate design, and make Catelyn Tully want to give her another motherly talk. On one occasion, she even wore a dress which made Eddard Stark offer her a cloak to preserve her modesty.
She truly adored that noble family on occasions.
The Servant opened the door for, and bowed, as Margery made her way in, she offered a sweet smile to the servant, knowing any little form of kindness she showed would only help cultivate the image she had so desperately sculpted for herself.
"Husband!" Margery gushed at him as soon as she arrived in his solar, Renly, impeccably dressed in a green doublet with a gold stag gave her an equally false smile.
"Wife!" Renly rose to his feet and opened his arms for a hug as if that's how it was customary to greet one another, as they hugged, and he patted her awkwardly on the back, she spotted Loras in the corner who gave her a toothy smile. "I'm glad you're here, I was just discussing today's festivities with Loras. "
Which more than likely involved wine, oil, and more than one prostitute. "Oh don't tell me, I do ever love surprises," she responded sweetly gazing into his blue eyes with her brown ones. Then the servant closed the door, and they jumped apart as if the other had greyscale."What do you want?" She asked, her patience running thin, knowing that Renly wanted her here even less than she wanted to be here.
"I've been thinking," Renly began, he wasn't exuding his usual confidence. If anything he seemed nervous, even with Loras who did look quite dashing in a blue doublet embroidered with a half dozen flowers on either of his arms. She briefly wondered which of them had a higher clothing budget, before realizing that it was undoubtedly Loras. She remembered he used to wear a different outfit for every meal of the day when he was younger.
"Yes?" Margery eyed her brother and husband wearily, dreading whatever nonsense that would come from her husband's mouth.
"Is it essential that we lay together?" Renly looked at her and Loras quickly, before stepping back, content to let the two siblings debate the issue. Loras always did hate to share his toys.
"You need an heir, and unless Loras can conceive, we, unfortunately, must do our duty." To both their credit, Renly and Loras did look slightly guilty, but only slightly. "That is unless you want the court whispering about your pretty young wife, and wondering why she remains without a child." The court would think her barren, and for a noble lady such as herself, that was indeed a death sentence.
"I've thought of that," Renly said after a moment, "I've been trying to think of a solution for quite some time." Margery did not know whether or not she should be offended by such a statement. "It was my brother who gave me the solution I so desperately craved. You see, I need a Baratheon heir, no one said it had to be my child."
"I beg your pardon?" She did not like this line of thought, and as she put two and two together, she was not happy with what her husband was going to ask of her.
"It's simple!" Renly clapped his hands together enthusiastically, "We need not lay together, Robert and Stannis, even Edric Storm at Storm's End could each provide you with a Baratheon son. You and I need not ever touch one another; it's a perfect solution!"
"You want me to cheat on you to provide you with a bastard heir?" Margery asked incredulously, not fully believing the idiocy of this plan. She wondered how Loras could love such a fool, or worse, how could she be married to one? He was asking her to sleep with one of his brothers. The idea of seducing Stannis was laughable in itself, Margaery would have a greater chance of success if she tried to sleep her way through the entire Kingsguard, which in truth could be quite easy depending on the truthfulness of some of the rumors she heard. Edric Storm was in Storm's End, and bringing a bastard to court would raise too many questions, and likely piss off Cersei, as fun as that would be. Tommen was too young, and she was not one to rob the cradle. Which left only two real option available to her. "I'm not fucking Robert or Joffrey."
The idea of sleeping with Robert made her feel sick, the fat drunk who always smelled of piss and cheese. She would rather become a silent sister. Then there was the idea of seducing Joffrey, how would she even go about such a task, murdering kittens in her smallclothes?
"I'm not asking you to marry anyone," Renly explained, weirdly forgetting that he planned for the two of them to marry a few short months ago, "I'm simply asking you to bed one of them, it only needs to happen once."
"You mean to cheat on you and have a bastard you can raise as your own; meanwhile the entire court laughs in your face?" perhaps she should be more outraged, but in all honesty, this wasn't that surprising. Annoying and humiliating beyond all comprehension, yes, but hardly surprising.
"No one will know it's a bastard, Robert won't brag about bedding you, at least not in public. And Joffrey doesn't have any friends, so we're safe. Besides, it's better to have rumors of you having a bastard around then for you to remain without a child." Renly explained. "Besides, you understood our marriage would be a lie from the beginning."
That was true; she even insisted on the marriage when she knew it would be a lie. She wanted her freedom, and traditional marriage would not give her that. Besides, her only other options were Joffrey, a mad cunt, Tyrion, an alcoholic dwarf, Trystane, a Dornish, Edmure Tully, a floppy fish, and Robb Stark. Robb was arguably her best option, but she would have to move North to be with was her only choice, but he was still her choice.
She bit her lip, trying to think before sighing in defeat. "Ok, I will think about it for some time. If there truly is no other option, I'll bed Robert." Joffrey was not an option, not after the incident with the Rabbits.
"I knew you would see it my way, and if it makes you feel better if half of what Cersei says is even remotely true, your time with Robert will go by without you feeling a single thing." Renly smiled and poured her a glass of Dornish Red, which she happily took.
She imagined it wouldn't be too bad; bedding Robert would be easy. At the next feast she would merely have to whisper in his ear, ask for a quick shag in a broom closet, and then she would never have to talk to him again.
Bedding a fat drunk who cared little for her pleasure, and for the good of the realm, she felt like Cersei, and that realization alone made her reach for more Wine.
….
Okay, couple things. Jon Arryn died of natural causes due to his advanced age, Eddard Stark still became the hand of the King, but it was a few years later. Which means that Robb Stark was old enough to rule the North by himself, and both Ned Stark and Catelyn Tully are in the Capital with Bran, Rickon, and their two daughters. Jon Snow is also still in Winterfell, never having Joined the Night's Watch.
Margery married Renly after a couple of Years as he was the best available option. Joffrey is not betrothed to Sansa in this timeline, their betrothal was broken after Ned Stark realized Joffrey was mad, instead, Sansa is betrothed to Willas, and Myrcella is betrothed to Robb Stark. Margery and Renlys marriage is a sham, and they don't even consider each other as friends at this point. Renly relationship with Loras has put tremendous pressure on what was an already pretty fragile marriage. Renly asking Margery to ho herself out so Renly can have a heir, pretty much pushed whatever friendship they had out the window(Just like Bran Stark, who incidentally did not get pushed out a window in this universe).
Ages:
Robert 41
Eddard 40
Catelyn: 38
Cersei: 36
Renly: 27
Margaery: 21
Robb 20
joffrey 19
Sansa 17
Myrcella 16
