Bitter Words Swallowed
Authoress: Wee-Me
DISCLAIMER: I don't own "Smallville" or any associated characters; I don't even really like the show so sue me not.
Note: Set just after the Davis/Doomsday arc, specifically after the Henry-Jimmy-whoever funeral when Clark flounces off to his tree fort, err, fortress. Definitely pre the Chlollieness and resumption of the Chlark friendship. Not especially kind to anyone, but especially not Clark. I was still annoyed with Failsday and how that season ended and what a jerk Clark was. I'm still annoyed that Chloe ever forgave him. So call this a fix-it-ish fic and take it all with a grain of salt.
Begin
Sometimes she saves herself the lecture and says what she knows he wants to hear. It's not a healthy way to work a friendship, but they haven't really been friends in years.
That is, if they ever were.
So sometimes she says "Yes Clark, of course you're right" instead of "Big Dumb Aliens who trusted multiple Luthors multiple times don't get to judge who is trustworthy". Or "I forgive you" when she really means "I hate you right now". Or even "I understand" when it's "One day your stupidity and/or mood swings are going to get me killed" that she really feels.
That's what she does the last day.
When her world has fallen down around her ears and he comes to kick at the rubble Chloe puts on her friend-mask and tells Clark what he expects her to say. He talks about the weakness of human emotion and blah blah, he's running away to his tree fort, no humans or girls allowed. She surreptitiously presses her side where the bruises and stitches are, the injuries he doesn't know about because he doesn't pay attention, to produce a few tears.
She's still banged all to hell, body and soul, from everything with Doomsday, but no one knows or cares. They're all busy mourning Jimmy, a guy they barely knew, and feeling sorry for themselves. No need to worry about Chloe, she'll keep 'til they need her again. Besides, she still needs to be punished for trying to make the best of a bad situation and for helping someone.
She swallows bitter words and bile, makes her voice sound choked with tears. She doesn't tell him that she hates him or she's glad he's going. Doesn't try to assign his portion of the blame- like maybe if he hadn't brain-raped her she would have called things off with Jimmy like she planned and he wouldn't have been around to die. That'd she'd known Jimmy was wrong for her when she was in her right mind and that he didn't treat her right. That she'd loved Jimmy, but not enough and the guilt that brings her. That sometimes her brain still shorts out and turns her to Amnesia-Barbie. Like when she told Jimmy all that stuff that made Davis lose it.
Speaking of Davis, she doesn't. She doesn't tell Clark anything about his co-alien. It's no use trying to explain herself again, he didn't and doesn't care about the reasons she helped Davis. She certainly won't tell him the better ones. Like how Davis tried to do the right thing without a cheerleading squad behind him, unlike Clark. That he was a better man, better human, in a lot of ways. That his main failing in life was the bad luck of having lunatic parents and bad genetics- and he'd tried to overcome even that. That she and Davis loved each other. She was even letting herself fall in love with him. She was willing to trade Clark's life for his. If her brain hadn't glitched she would have taken him and run like hell the minute he woke up. She's the one that had Davis reburied in a nice plot in a quiet cemetery in town.
Most importantly for getting Clark out of her life posthaste she doesn't mention that a plain human couldn't have driven a pipe through Jimmy like that. Even a strong human wouldn't have gotten through the spine and all his organs. Whichever planet the emotions came from the strength, and the ensuing danger, was all Krypton. That's the part she has to really fight not to say, that Krypton is to blame as much as Earth, if not more. He can talk all he wants about the rest, but his speech about human emotion is what really gets her itching to use that green rock in her purse.
He comes from a people who fought a war that destroyed their planet, that created people like Zod, whose computers are capable of open scorn. They had emotions. And worse ones than humans it sounds like to her. Forget using just the green, she wants to use the blue rock to beat him to death for having enough nerve and stupidity to say that to her.
She wants to scream, "You're from Krypton, not Vulcan you dipshit. Why weren't you ever worried about emotions when you hurt your friends and family? Or when you were stalking and obsessing about Lana? Or any of the times you were selfish and put people in danger?" But she holds it in, has to to get him out of her life.
She crooks her nails into another set of bruises across her stomach so she can weep prettily as he leaves, fully believing whatever nonsense she spouted and that she'll be waiting for him when he comes back. Because he will be back, she knew that as soon as he said he was leaving. And she will be waiting for him when he comes, but not like the sad puppy he thinks she'll be.
He wanted her to realize that Kryptonians aren't like humans, but she already knew that. Davis showed her that when he changed into a monster those aliens made and when his strength broke Jimmy right in front of her. Clark had shown her that dangerous side too, but it took seeing Davis, that was always so careful with her, to make her realize just how dangerous they could be.
She stands still and silent as Clark takes his leave. When she's counted to one hundred and fifty she wipes her eyes and gets to work. A quick check of the computer terminal hidden in the corner shows Clark is already in his little ice house. Another thing she never mentioned, Braniac might be gone, but some of his knowledge remains alongside hers. She's ten times the hacker she used to be and she was good to begin with. Tracking the least subtle crime fighter ever is cake. It made getting this place signed over to her a breeze too, same for all her new tech sitting in the lead lined crates in the corner and the money filling her accounts.
She skimmed a little off the top of every major company worldwide, and a little more from Queen Industries out of pique. Even more from the Luthors for old times sake. If Oliver ever pulls himself up from the bottom of the bottle to pay attention to his company again he'll have a real reason to hate her. After him and Clark she's off heroes all together, she'll save what and who she can by herself from now on.
She'll protect herself better this time too. She has dirt on each of the companies she skimmed from and a dossier full of dirty secrets on each of her former hero friends. She doesn't skimp on the details either or skip the ones she doesn't know personally. There won't be anymore pulled punches. If they come after her she's not going down without a fight.
She taps out a message to a contact she wouldn't have been able to stand in her idealistic youth. The reply comes thirty minutes later when she's setting green K all around the perimeter of the room. Production of green and blue K weapons will begin in the morning, expected completion in two weeks. About the time this space will be finished. Thin lead sheeting under the Kryptonite composite tile floors, also under the Kryptonite based paint on the walls and ceilings.
If Clark steps foot inside the place will light up the like a neon sign. That will be his first clue that things aren't how he left them. A cache of the weapons in one lead case and others hidden around the space will be the second if, and when, he doesn't take a hint. The rest of the weapons will be divvied up to different locations and with people who will use them if need be. She'll surely be painted a monster if Clark and Ollie's little club ever finds out.
The same people who called Davis, who tried so hard, an irredeemable beast in need of putting down will never understand having precautions against Clark. At least not until he's gone rogue on them. Precaution is all this is, as she'll explain to the alien himself, just a little insurance. Maybe she can liken it to checks and balances, a way to make sure his power doesn't get out of control and destroy the puny humans. She'll even offer to let him do the same to her, perhaps, if he can be made to see reason.
As long as he isn't hurting anyone though she couldn't care less what he does. He can be a hero or not, a reporter or a farmer, a hobo or anything else he wants. Let him live wherever, stalk Lana or whoever. "Be my guest," she'll say. "As long as you don't hurt anyone or come bothering me, I could not give less of a damn what you do." All she wants is her tower and to help people her own way. Along the lines of Isis, but better and more focused. With her Brainiac based info and her returning healing ability fixing her mind she should be able to do a better job this time. Or, if she's finally as mad as any other meteor infectee, someone else can take her place while she gets sent off to Belle Reeve.
In any case she'll finally be able to let the sharp glass words off her tongue instead of swallowing them. She'll finally get to say the best words, the ones that she's been holding back too long.
"Goodbye Clark. Goodbye and good riddance."
End
AUTHOR'S NOTE: Found this one in an old spiral notebook, what's with all these? No I don't know why Smallville either. Obviously there was very little about the show that made me happy. [Seriously, I would rather Chloe have gone rogue than cave to Clark. Grr.]
Part of my 2011 13 Posts/Days of Halloween.
