A Letter of Complaint

by a tea cup

The Ministry of Magic,
London

To whom it may concern.

Until recently I was enjoying a relaxed life in a prestigious position, then suddenly without warning instead of standing proudly besides a malted milk biscuit, I found myself nibbling on the said biscuit!

As you could imagine I was very confused with regards to the situation. Biscuits are there to be dunked in a tea cup, not eaten by the tea cup.

It wasn't until later when I found my world dominated by sawdust that I discovered that I had been the victim of a magical demonstration. You wizarding folk seem to go around changing things willy-nilly without a thought to the consequences!

I liked being a tea cup. I had very few concerns in the world, but in my present form I am overwhelmed with concerns; neither am I happy with my presentation! A delicate floral patten and the best bone china are no match for a mere brown.

You can no doubt understand my position and I would be grateful if you would hasten to rectify the situation immediately.

Now if you must excuse me, there is a corner I haven't piddled in and I must run in my wheel and squeak a bit.

Yours faithfully,

a (former) tea cup.