The Case of the Mysterious Seaweed Randomness
Once upon a time, Mr. Seaweed and his family were going out for a delightful picnic. Suddenly, a small, orange man jumped out from behind the bushes! Sister Seaweed said, "Oh wow, he looks like an Oompa Loompa!"
The Mother Seaweed said, "Oh look at its green hair! It looks like seaweed!"
"Wow," said Brother Seaweed.
"Who are you, and why have you come to disturb our peaceful Chocolate Factory?" the Oompa Loompa growled.
Little Sister Seaweed stepped forward bravely and said, "If you please, Oompa Loompa, sir…" She gave a hesitant glance back to Mama Seaweed, who sent her an encouraging nod. "I am Sister Seaweed, and this is the rest of my beloved Seaweed family. We do not want to hurt you. Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory is one of my favorite books in the whole world! Does Charlie Bucket still live here?"
"No," said Frank, the Oompa Loompa. "He got married, then divorced, and became a hobo living in Louisiana."
"Oh," said the sister.
Frank said, "Please sit over there for your picnic, and enjoy the factory!"
Brother Seaweed asked hopefully, "Well, do you need another kid to help run the factory?" I happen to know one who might be interested…"
Frank said, "We do need one. We'll need a new one; the one we have is sick with rabies. Hey," said Frank. "Make sure the kid isn't made out of seaweed, because they'll murder you in the night and then eat you!"
Mama and Papa Seaweed turned to each other in horror as Frank walked away. "Well, I don't care!" Brother Seaweed announced defiantly. "I just won't tell them I'm seaweed! They'll never know…"
Famous last words! The Seaweed family moved into the Chocolate Factory and immediately ate all the chocolate in the whole factory, and that night, Willy Wonka crept into their bedroom and ate them!
And they all lived miserably ever after.
THE END!
