So one day, two weeks ago, I said 'Hey, let's give up sugar' and these two crazy ladies I love totally pretty much immediately agreed. It's been 15 days and in the Klaroline fandom we don't do sober chips but sober fics, the result of which you are currently looking at. Thank you Erika and Kaitlyn for giving up added sugar and ice-cream respectively, you are amazing Klarobesties. Hope you like :)

I'll say it for my new readers – Happy Place AU aka no Hayley, baby or anything else that sucks. This takes place in NOLA but has none of TO's plot because I have better things to do with my life than watch that show. All you need to know to read this is that the vampires and some of the werewolves are in the midst of a war because reasons ;)


Caroline was doing the nod.

That was how he liked to refer to it when he was attempting to sincerely explain his situation while she shamelessly pretended like his explanations were in any way valuable.

He stopped pacing to glare at her.

"Cut it out, love."

She opened her eyes wide. "What? I'm just listening to your brilliant reasoning. Please, continue," she smiled, the sarcasm dripping from her words.

"You know how much the nod annoys me," he growled.

"Seriously?" she glared. "You don't get to tell me what to do with my body. Just keep talking, I've been waiting all night to hear this."

Klaus stared back at her mutinously but she didn't relent and after a few seconds he sighed before continuing.

"Their scent led us into the bar, where we discovered them. However – "

He broke off with a growl, noticing that she was still doing the mockingly patient nodding. He threw up his hands.

"You're mocking me!"

"And you ruined my party!"

Klaus folded his arms and stood back, clenching his jaw. The blonde clearly had some venting to do and it had become apparent that no explanation from his side was going to appease her until she said what she needed to.

She shot him a glare before standing up off the bed, finished with her pretend understanding mode.

"I spent a month planning that dinner. Do you get that? A month. And do you know who it was for?"

She tapped her foot and Klaus realised that her question had not been rhetorical.

He sighed heavily before replying. "Me."

"Yes! For you! All month everyone's been talking about the amazing dinner party to honour the king so it made for a pretty amazing sight when the supposed king came bursting through the doors an hour late coated in blood and one hundred percent not wearing the suit I picked out for him!"

Her chest was heaving when she finished and Klaus couldn't help smirking.

"Well at least that meant the suit was prevented from being bloodied."

"That is not funny," she glared.

Klaus sighed and wiped all expression from his face again. Caroline often went into tirades but for the most part they were good-natured and only took a few words to calm – usually an assurance that he would reprimand his sister or a barman or whomever was causing her the trouble.

But rarely Caroline would get truly furious about something and this happened to be one of those times. Problematically, he hadn't quite worked out how to resolve this mood of hers yet.

"There must be a way I can acquit myself," he appealed to her more generous nature.

Which was clearly not present at the moment because she increased her glaring before turning on her heel.

"You can start by sleeping on the couch," she said with a final tone exiting as she mumbled. "Which shouldn't be too difficult considering I've hardly seen you for the past week anyway."

Klaus sighed heavily again before turning to his easel. It was best not to go after Caroline when she got like this. Much like his own, it was usually better to let her anger dissipate naturally.

Not to mention that he could hardly fight her on any of her points, particularly the last one. He'd been busy strategizing and planning for last night's attack all week, usually coming home only for somewhere around three hours of sleep before heading out again.

The canvas before him was blank and with crossed arms he attempted figuring out what to put on it. But where usually an image appeared in his mind that his fingers itched to replicate – something he'd felt with Caroline since the first day he'd met her in that goddamned high school – nothing came to mind now.

He continued trying to dredge up something but finally realised that with his current werewolf dilemma and Caroline being upset with him, he was just too frazzled to paint, not to mention too exhausted to reach for a brush.

Klaus growled when he heard footsteps enter the room. "Not in the mood, mate."

"I'm guessing she didn't take it well, then?" Marcel asked.

Klaus spun to face the vampire with a raised brow. "What the bloody hell do you think?"

Marcel winced and smartly took two steps back. Klaus was not happy right now.

The worst part of it all was that the blonde affecting his mood wasn't even being unreasonable. Last night wouldn't have been the first time he ate a meal in bloodied attire so the evening could still have been salvaged after his entrance, if not for the half dozen frenzied vampires following behind him. In their search for the werewolves, they'd managed to demolish all the room's decorations, overturn the dinner table and rustle up a few guests – destroying all Caroline's hard work in seconds before Klaus had the chance to call them off.

"You know this is your fault," Klaus growled, stepping closer to the vampire threateningly.

Marcel held up his hands. "Hey man, you know someone screwed us over."

"Yes and what exactly is the point of having a right hand man if he proves to be useless in finding the flaws in a plan?"

Marcel sighed and shrugged. "We got faulty information. It happens."

"Not to me!" Klaus roared.

Marcel stepped back with a gulp. "Look, I'll find out what went wrong, ok?"

"You say that as if it's optional," Klaus replied but felt calmer now that he'd gotten to scream at someone. "But for now I need something else."

"It's 1AM so let me guess, for Caroline?"

The hybrid glared. "Don't tell me appeasing your queen is too belittling or inconveniencing of a job for you."

Marcel laughed good-naturedly. "On the contrary, Klaus. If the past six months has taught me anything, it's that you're happy when she is, which usually suits me just fine."

Klaus considered addressing the implications of that then shook his head, thinking better of it.

"Good. Then let's get started."


Caroline exited the library.

Not only did it have the best TV but it also irritated Klaus endlessly when she watched in there so it had served as the perfect place to have a Gossip Girl re-watch marathon. Because seriously, for all Chuck Bass' faults at least he'd never completely physically wrecked a dinner Blair had spent forever planning.

She'd watched all her favourite episodes as a means of passing the early hours of the morning, since she'd been too angry to go to sleep.

But she'd decided to stick her head outside considering the afternoon light coming in through even the study's thick curtains and now she stood intrigued as she noticed strange noises emanating from different parts of the house.

Strange thuds were coming from the linen room and banging and hitting was coming from the kitchen, from where the most amazing smells were also wafting up the stairs.

Frowning, she walked down the hallway as she called out. "Klaus? Klaus?"

He was before her in a flash and she stepped back, noting his self-satisfied expression.

"What's going on?"

"We're leaving in an hour," he said breezily before stepping past her.

"Leaving?" Caroline frowned. "Where to?"

"You'll find out in an hour," he replied as he walked away.

Caroline gritted her teeth. Damn him. She could either refuse to go and never find out what he was talking about or she could hop into a shower and find out what all the fuss was about.

And he knew her well. Caroline Forbes was just way too curious for the former.


"This is so uncomfortable," she complained.

He rolled his eyes with a smile. "It's walking backwards, not over coals."

She glared. "You're lucky I'm even here. And don't think I don't know that this is just a ploy to get me to hold your hands."

Klaus laughed before taking his hands from hers.

"Turn around."

She shot him a haughty look before taking a breath and slowly spinning.

He couldn't see her face but smiled when she gasped. It wasn't often that Niklaus Mikaelson planned woodlands picnics but when he did, he went all out.

"Oh my god, it's so beautiful," she gushed, putting her hands to her face in surprise.

She wasn't sure how but it was like he'd created their own personal slice of spring in the woods with a thick blanket spread out in the middle of all the flowers and atop the thick bed of leaves. Surrounding it were large wicker baskets and ice buckets with champagne bottle heads sticking out the top.

And to top it all off, the little pocket in the woods he'd found was entirely surrounded by tree cover, excluding only the spot where the blanket sat, upon which the sun shone perfectly. She itched to lay down and get some of its warmth on her back.

Caroline spun back around to him. "What's all this about?"

Stepping closer, he smiled, his dimples showing adorably.

"Well, I couldn't make up for what happened last night but you're right, we've spent far too little time together lately and I thought it about time to put that right."

She regarded him for a moment, trying to keep up the angry charade, but the truth was he'd had her at the dimples.

Grinning, she stepped forward and laid a hand on his chest.

"That's much more Chuck Bass of you."

Klaus frowned and opened his mouth, clearly to question who that even was, but she gripped him by his shirt and pulled him over onto the blanket.


"This is amazing," Caroline said contentedly.

Klaus smiled down at her. She was lying on her stomach, the sun toasting the part of her back left bare by her dress.

"Did you like the food?"

"Yeah, it was incredible," she smiled.

Klaus smiled too before leaning down to pull the hair away from her face. She looked at him curiously as he moved closer to speak into her ear.

"I'm sorry for last night."

With that he stroked a thumb down the soft skin on her back.

"I know you worked tirelessly and it was all destroyed in seconds."

Her eyes fluttered closed as each sentence came with another stroke down her back, his thumb warmer than even the sun.

"I'm going to make it up to you and I promise the correct parties will be punished aptly."

"Any leads on how it all went wrong?"

"Beyond the werewolves somehow outsmarting us? Not as yet. But it shouldn't remain that way long. Marcel knows to give me heads to make roll or it'll be his."

"What healthy relationships you have with your compatriots," she teased.

He laughed. "Whatever works, love."

"Hmmm," she hummed as he placed a feather-light kiss down on her cheek. "I love you."

"I love you." He frowned. "I've said that far too little this past week."

Her eyes were closed but she smiled. "I'm not disagreeing there."

He laughed lightly. "Words I've been waiting to hear for the past six months."

She giggled. "Don't pretend like you haven't loved every minute of it, Klaus Mikaelson."

"I would never," he promised as he leaned down again.

Caroline stiffened in surprise when he laid his lips at the start of her spine.

Immediately she relaxed as his mouth went to work on her skin, his familiar lips working their way down her back, sending sparks everywhere. Her original purpose for wearing this dress had been to tease Klaus with what he was missing but god it was serving an even better function right now.

The hybrid was clearly having the same line of thought as he laid a hand on her bare leg. Again she stiffened instinctively before relishing in the strength of his hand and the callouses in his palm as it moved higher up her leg.

His lips reached her lower spine just as his hand reached the inside of her thighs. Caroline gasped, tingles running through her body, but she was ashamed to note that that there was something stronger pulling at all her muscles.

Lifting her head to look at him, she spoke. "Lie down with me."

Klaus smirked. It had clearly been an order and though he wanted to do unspeakable things to her body far more, he couldn't deny that they could both use a nap, particularly after the all-nighter they'd ended up pulling most recently.

"Fine but no calling me a tease later," Klaus taunted as he laid down on his back.

Caroline giggled as she settled herself on his chest. He brought his arms around her and Caroline fell asleep with a dopey smile on her face and her head to her hybrid's heart.


She was woken by a low growl.

Her eyes opened sleepily and she jolted awake when she saw, practically right in front of her face, a set of yellow eyes set above a bared set of non-human teeth.

She didn't know where her hand was but she knew it was somewhere on him and she shook wildly to wake Klaus as out of the corner of her eye she noticed the full moon hanging proudly in the sky.

She swore if wolves could smile, this one did and she practically saw her life flash before her eyes as Klaus woke with a start and confusion.

"What the – "

"Klaus, let me go!"

The panic in her tone caused him to release her immediately even in his sleepy state and she brought her newly freed arm up to elbow the descending werewolf in his jaw. It jerked to the side and before she knew it a high whimper escaped it as she heard a sickening crack.

Her stomach dropped as she realised that she wasn't on top of Klaus anymore but that he was leaning over her, dropping the wolf's body.

"Oh, god," she whimpered, looking past him.

Klaus turned and she heard a hiss escape his lips as at least another dozen wolves approached, teeth bared.

"Caroline, go," he commanded, his voice slightly muffled by his dropping fangs.

She was up in a flash but didn't go anywhere. Two wolves leapt at Klaus and moving as quickly as she could, Caroline lifted the blanket they'd been on and sped up to wrap the one in it.

Klaus took care of the other, knocking it unconscious with a single well-placed smack. It resounded, causing the rest of the wolves to snarl.

She used the confused state of her wolf in mid-air to punch it to the ground, giving it a kick in the ribs for good measure.

Up until that moment everything had happened in a type of slow motion but now it was all a blur as another wolf came rushing at her. She spun and shot out her leg, roundhouse kicking it across the way.

"Your left!" Klaus shouted to the tune of more necks cracking.

She turned immediately and did the first thing she could think of – her hand came away stickily from the wolf's chest and she dropped the heart to the floor in shock.

"Caroline!" Klaus yelled and she spun to see why but it was too late.

A werewolf was on top of her in a second, jumping her hard enough to land her on her back.

She shrieked on impulse before reaching out to put her hands on either side of its head. Frustrated, it snarled and snapped at her but couldn't bite her with the way she was holding it back. Which wouldn't last for long.

Klaus was dealing with four wolves as they circled him. Her shriek brought the sort of clarity to his mind that he hadn't had been afforded in an incredibly long time.

His thoughts were crisp as he spun and ripped out two hearts simultaneously. The wolves hadn't hit the ground yet as he buried his elbow in another's spine, breaking it irreparably even for a werewolf.

Whimpers and blood filled the air and none of it was Klaus'. That was what mattered.

Everything else was secondary to his survival.

Another spine cracked under the weight of his boot and the animal screeched loudly. He couldn't give a damn. Caroline was all that mattered. Nothing was secondary to his survival because he had to ensure her safety.

The shriek from the last fallen wolf distracted Caroline's just long enough for her to move her one hand and grab a nearby champagne bottle. She crashed it against the animal's head. It didn't fall but wobbled, looking confused, providing just enough time for Caroline to snap its neck.

Throwing the dead wolf off her, she saw Klaus stalking towards her.

Then she gasped. "Klaus, duck."

He dropped immediately and with impeccable precision she threw the leftover piece of her bottle, the jagged parts hitting the werewolf's jugular. It had launched itself in a last attempt to attack the hybrid and now it twisted in the air, struggling, before it dropped unceremoniously with a thud.

Klaus rose and spun to face it.

She saw him smile cruelly when he noticed that it was just barely alive. He lifted his boot and brought it down on the bottle stuck in the wolf's neck, applying just enough pressure to torture but not kill.

"Caroline, find me a live one, love," Klaus instructed.

She felt sure he'd killed them all and moreover had no idea why he was asking for an alive werewolf but her eyes dutifully combed the area as Klaus kept his gaze trained on the wolf beneath his boot.

She almost skipped over it but saw a slightly moving chest. She sped over.

The werewolf was barely hanging on but was the only live body here besides the one Klaus was currently lauding over.

She grabbed it by the scruff of its neck before pulling it over to where Klaus stood not too far away.

He looked like a maniac, the villain mask set as he forced the injured werewolf's chin up to look into his eyes.

"Watch this, mate. And go and tell the rest of your pack that they can expect a similar fate if they dare think of touching her again."

Caroline frowned and was about to question him but in the next second he'd ripped the other werewolf's head clean off its body.

She wanted to hurl as the half-broken champagne bottle fell to the ground between the wolf's severed head and middle.

"Now limp off," he ordered, his face contorting with rage.

She let the wolf go and it whimpered highly, looking around at its fallen partners.

She felt almost sorry for it.

Then the hybrid held out his hand to her. It was covered in blood, as was all the rest of him and his eyes were still amber just as the eyes of all the animals he'd just killed unblinkingly.

Unblinkingly she took his hand.


Caroline regarded him as he stepped out of the bathroom.

All the blood was gone and she could smell his shower gel from where she sat on their bed. But she'd hoped for a half-naked Klaus to emerge from the bathroom and this one was fully clothed.

She'd gone to a guest bathroom and taken the quickest shower ever and now sat in her towel watching him as he sorted his clothing from earlier and this morning into a pile, which was probably meant for the furnace.

"I feel like you need a murder outfit," she teased, trying to lighten the mood. "Too much John Varvatos and Tom Ford being ruined here," she pointed at the red pile.

Klaus managed the tiniest of smiles as he approached their dressing table.

"Every outfit is my murdering outfit."

He placed his phone into his back pocket.

"You're going somewhere?"

She'd figured as much, which was why she'd taken such a quick shower, so she could intercept him.

He sighed heavily. "To gather the troops."

"Can't it wait till tomorrow?"

His eyes flashed. "You saw what happened tonight. They're becoming too brazen. Next they'll walk right into our house!"

She winced, looking out of the window. It was already beginning to become light.

"Klaus, the night's almost over and besides, you just decimated probably more than half their pack. None of whom are going to be walking anywhere ever again."

He seemed to listen to her reasoning but eventually shook his head and she sighed. Once he had his mind set on something he was either going to do it or there would be hell to pay.

He was coiled so tight and she couldn't help thinking that he would explode at the wrong moment. Marcel would probably end up bearing the brunt of it. That was if he made it out alive.

The image of Klaus dropping his elbow onto a wolf's spine, killing it, flashed into her mind. Then the cruel smile and the head rip.

He laid a kiss on her forehead and made to move away but she stood, blocking his path.

"Just stay. Let's get some sleep."

He gritted his teeth. "I believe we did enough of that today."

She was shocked. "Are you blaming what happened on me?"

He recoiled, stepping back. "Of course not. That's not what I – "

"Good, because you've been enough of a jerk about it all!"

Looking utterly perplexed, Klaus shook his head, seemingly out of confusion about what else to do.

"I mean how could you just tell me to go like that?"

Realisation dawned on him and he sighed.

"You may remember that I'm unkillable and you're a vampire susceptible to their poisonous bites," he bit out.

She glared. "Yeah, and having a boyfriend with the cure to their only threat kinda renders that moot."

He shook his head vehemently like she still wasn't getting something.

"Caroline, the more times they bite you, the more venom runs through your veins. And if they were to drag you off and bite you continuously, as I'm sure was their plan, you would've been dead in minutes."

She couldn't stop a shudder running through her body. She didn't want to believe what he was saying but it made a sick kind of sense, especially because of the way that first wolf had been staring at her as she slept – probably trying to figure out how to get her out of Klaus' hold.

His jaw clenched. "Do you still think this war can be solved peacefully?"

"You threw that idea out of the window as soon as I said it," she murmured.

He sighed again. "I'll be back in a few hours."

He tried to side-step her but she blocked his path again, putting her body flush against his. Klaus sucked in a breath as she pulled herself up to her full height to lay her mouth on his collarbone.

"Please stay," she said into his skin.

His body was so tight against hers. Ready to uncoil and spring and kill.

"I need you." She breathed. "I'm scared."

For what he would do if he left here right now in the mood he was in. About her own killings flashing behind her eyelids.

He could take her guilt and she would take his boiling rage.

They were the same, after all, only different. Two sides of the same coin and made for each other. Pick your description – the point was they absorbed each other's poison and she needed that right now.

His body relaxed against hers and Caroline let out a breath of relief. She'd known he couldn't leave if she said those words.

Tenderly she laid soft kisses down in the hollow of his neck before taking a small step backwards.

"You know, I looked while I was in the shower and didn't see any bites but I think…" she started, taking another step backwards and gripping the knot on her towel. "You should look too just to be sure," she finished, dropping her towel.

She hadn't drawn another breath before she was flat on the bed, Klaus between her legs. She giggled in surprise before her breath caught as she saw the way he was looking down at her.

"You," he said, working to keep his eyes in their human form, "are very distracting."

"It could be worse," she pointed out breathily.

He cocked his head and she almost giggled at the dog-like gesture.

"You could be on the couch," she pointed out with a small smile.

Klaus smirked wolfishly before leaning down to place hot, frantic kisses between her breasts. Wrapping her legs around his waist, she ground her hips up against his jeans-clad ones as she fingered the edge of his Henley.

Suddenly Klaus pulled away and her eyes snapped open at the loss of contact.

She frowned when she realised that he was pulling a face. An unpleased one.

"What's wrong?" she asked worriedly.

He dragged a thumb down the side of her body absently as he looked at her with a troubled expression.

"You still smell like other wolves."

It was such a weird observation that she froze for a second. For a moment there she'd really thought there had been a genuine issue with her body or a bite after all.

Damn Klaus and his sharp senses because she swore she only smelled like perfume, body lotion and florally shower gel.

Then she pulled her lips into his trademark smirk, the one she loved kissing away so much.

"Then make me smell like mine."

He smiled and it was wolfish and lewd and just the way she loved him.

Later there would be more war and strategizing and threats but right now there was just them and Caroline knew she could deal with all the rest of the supernatural threats in New Orleans if after a day like today they could come home and be together like this.

This could be her home – this was her home now.

She knew Klaus would continue to make it as safe as possible for her, even if he had to personally threaten every supernatural being there was. As cruel as it had been, by sending that message to the wolves, he'd protected her tonight. Just like he always had and, she knew, always would.

And as the hybrid kissed her like she was the only thing that mattered in the entire world, she knew something else: he was her home.