"Book Research"
Breathalittlelonger
Summary: Who knew that book research could be so much fun-or cause so much trouble?
Genre: Humor/Gen.
Disclaimers: I do not own Castle.
Authors Notes: Just some idea I had a while back, whilst watching an older episode of the show. No real spoilers, just a bit of humor at Castle's expense...
"You want me to tie you up AGAIN?" Alexis asked in disbelief as she stared at her father, sitting in the center of the room, with his back against a tall, rigid chair. Castle grinned.
"This time using rope." He agreed. Alexis sighed.
"The first time wasn't enough?" She demanded. "If this keeps up, something could go seriously wrong, and you'd be tied to that chair for the rest of your life." She added with a mischievous grin.
"Now there's an idea for a show at a museum." Martha said, coming into the room. "You ready, pumpkin?"
"Dad wants me to tie him up again-this time with ropes." Alexis informed her, looking aggrieved. Martha turned towards her son.
"You haven't learned anything from last time? And why with ropes?" Martha added, looking interested.
"Nikki's tied up in a barn-with ropes that are used for horses." He explained. "And there's nothing in sight, which is why I'm in the middle of the room. I'd do this outdoors, but as there's a lot of people-"
"They'll think you're crazy." Alexis agreed. "Okay. I'll do it-on one condition."
"Name it." Her dad said with a serious look. Alexis smirked.
"You get to do the dishes tonight." Alexis proposed. His face fell.
"Aw-"
"It's a fair trade." Martha agreed, grinning. "You're gone almost all the time, and you make Alexis do almost all the chores." She informed him. Alexis stared at him sternly. He sighed.
"All right. I agree." He replied, looking hopeful as she came to him.
"Swear." She demanded. He hesitated.
"I swear to do the dishes tonight-unless I get called in on a case." He added, as an afterthought.
"Fair enough. And if you don't-then I'll tie you to your bed, and tell Kate that you're not coming to work for a week." Alexis threatened. Martha giggled at Rick's horrified look.
"You'd keep me tied up in my room? Literally?" He complained.
"Unless you're too afraid…" Alexis started, when Castle stared at her.
"Tie me up. Now." He ordered. Alexis, giggling, began tying him up. Martha rolled her eyes.
"It's nice to know that I live with such children." She commented.
"I'm actually a child." Alexis reminded her.
"And I'm your son-so technically…we ARE children." Castle said with a smirk. Martha glowered at him.
"Hurry up and finish tying him up-" Martha started, and then paused. "I can't believe that I'm saying the exact same thing I did last time she duck-taped you to that chair." She muttered, shaking her head.
"And as before, Dad…I'm taking all your cash." Alexis said with a giggle. He sighed.
"Fine…just leave my credit cards alone." He warned. Alexis nodded.
"Deal." She agreed. Then, she disappeared, came back with a white towel, and tied it around his mouth, gagging him. "Love you." She added, snagging his wallet.
"Mph!" He tried to speak, but then scowled when the gag prevented him from doing so. She giggled again, and quickly went out the room, locking the door behind her. Martha was already waiting outside, and he was totally alone. He grinned through the gag.
He eyed the room around him, and tried to think of what Nikki Heat would do in this situation. Last time, she used the trashcan to free him from his gag, but since this was a towel, he would need at least one hand in order to free his mouth. He was just starting to scoot his chair towards the kitchen-when the door began to jiggle.
"Castle? You there?" He froze at the all-too familiar voice of Kate Beckett. With a panic, he realized that his wallet-empty-was lying on the floor, as though someone really had robbed him.
"MPHM!" He tried to talk through the gag, but frustratingly, he couldn't say much.
Outside, Beckett heard him but couldn't understand his words. Her eyes narrowed, and she then wondered why Castle would lock himself in his own…apartment. Her eyes widening at the realization she kicked the door in and came to a stand-still at seeing Rick Castle tied to a chair, in the middle of his room with his wallet on the floor. He looked at her sheepishly, and she growled. Whoever had done this…
Castle watched as she pulled out her cell-phone, and began to call someone. He frowned, wondering…and then his eyes widened.
"MPHMP!" He protested, and Kate turned back to him.
"Castle, I have to call this in-we need to figure out who did this to you." She protested. He shook his head.
"MPHMP!" He tried to speak again, jumping up and down in the chair, making it scrap against the floor.
"I'll untie you here in a minute." Kate promised absently. The phone must've picked up because a second later, and she was saying, "Ryan, get Kevin and get down here…also bring Lanie. Castle's been attacked."
A pause, and Castle was gritting his teeth through the gag.
"Yeah…you're already close? Five minutes? Great. I'll see you in a bit." She promised. He frowned when he heard how close they already were. Kate looked at him, closed her phone, and said,
"They'll be here soon." She eyed the place. "No one's here?" She asked. He rolled his eyes, and looked pointedly down at the gag around his mouth. She blinked. "Oh." She realized, and then went towards him and took out the gag.
"Thanks. Towel's aren't very tasty for breakfast." Castle said with a weak grin on his face.
"Who did this?" She demanded.
"You wouldn't believe me if I told you." Castle said in a solemn voice. She sighed.
"Castle, I'm serious…" Castle heard her bring out something sharp, and then a split second later, felt something cutting at the rope tying his feet to the chair.
"We're here." Javier, Ryan, and Lanie each came into the scene. "What happened?"
"Castle was attacked and tied to a chair." Kate answered in a rush, while she managed to cut his feet loose.
"Are you hurt?" Lanie asked in concern, coming over to him. Castle grimaced.
"No…I'm not hurt." He took a breath. "I'm doing book research." He admitted. All four of them blinked.
"What?"
"Are you trying to tell us that you weren't attacked?" Kate demanded. "I came in here, found you tied to a chair, your cash gone-"
"His wallets still on the floor." Javier agreed.
"With you struggling to get free." Kate finished. "How is that NOT being attacked?"
"Because Alexis is the one who tied me to a chair." Castle admitted, looking embarrassed.
For a moment there was dead silence.
Then everyone burst out laughing, while Kate stared at him in disbelief.
"You're joking." She said flatly.
"I wish I was. She came in here, said she was taking all my cash, and then took off with Martha." Castle admitted, grinning.
"What…"
"It happened before, right?" Ryan asked suddenly. Castle blinked. "When you came into work, saying you were a little "tied up"?"
"Yeah. That's right." Castle agreed, shrugging. "Book research. I was trying to figure out how Nikki Heat would escape from being tied up in a barn."
"Why's she tied up in a barn to begin with?" Lanie asked, frowning.
"For that, madam, you'll have to read my book. Now…do we have a case?" Castle asked eagerly.
"Actually we were all heading out for breakfast." Kate admitted. "But since you're doing book research…" She trailed off with a grin. Castle's own smile fell.
"That's just cruel." He protested.
"We can tie you up again. And this time, better than your teenage daughter can." Kate said smugly.
"And we'll add duck-tape on top of the rope." Javier added with a chuckle. Castle's eyes widened.
"That isn't-" He started.
"Oh, but we're not trying to be nice." Lanie said, smiling widely. "We're just trying to help you with your book research…with a little extra detail. Right, Kate?" She asked with a grin.
"Yes. Guys…get some duck-tape." Kate ordered.
"NO!" Castle protested. "This could work for my book, someone coming to free Nikki Heat, and-"
"But where's the fun in that?" Lanie asked with a grin. "Castle, you know how we think…but you don't know how criminals think."
"And we can show you exactly how they would think." Kate said with a sly grin on her face as she began taping him to the chair. "First, duck-tape. And then you'd have to figure out how to get to the rope that's on top of the duck-tape. Not to mention whatever added things the criminals tossed in. Fire in the room. Locked windows and doors. Chained to the wall."
"Even tossed in a lake." Ryan chimed in.
"Dangling over a bridge." Javier added.
"Guys, come on-we've got work to do!" Castle protested, trying to escape, but with the rope already lashed to him, and the duck-tape now tying him tighter to the chair, he found it next to impossible.
"It's book research." All four of them said at the same time. Castle glared.
"I'll get you back for this." He warned.
"Oh really?" Lanie asked with a grin.
"Just you wait-" Castle started to say, but then Kate duck-taped his mouth shut. He grimaced and she smiled.
"Come on, guys. Let's go get some breakfast." Kate suggested. "Have fun with your book research!" She added; laughed, followed the rest of them out, and then Castle watched as she locked the door behind herself. He squirmed through the duck tape.
And then eyed the trashcan on the opposite side of the room.
END.
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