Title: Least Expected
Name: Misha
E-mail:
Rating: PG
Category: Got it all.
Content: A/C
Summary: After saving four people from two vampires, Angel and Cordelia invite them back to the hotel, and then are ambushed.
Spoilers: S1 The L-Word. S3 AtS.
Disclaimer: Not mine. Don't claim them...anymore.
Distribution: Want some? Come get some...
Notes: Angel: Wesley took Conner, he's yet to come back as a teenager, Angel's coping, Cordy's helping, Groo's gone, Gunn's with Fred, Wes's not part of the group. Cordy's hair is brown again because I said so. L-Word: After Jenny's affair, her and Tim are on their way out. Bette and Tina are still together.
Thanks/Dedication: My cousin Amanda who inspired this very strange crossover.
Feedback: Hell yeah.

PARTONE

Bette, Tina, Tim and Jenny walked out of The Planet. The club was located in West Hollywood and wasn't known for catering to heterosexual couples. Nothing in this part of town really was. Being here didn't help Tim trust Jenny since her affair with Marlena. But they both needed to get out of the house and away from the tension that was suffocating them both. Going out with their friends seemed like a simple solution.

So here they all were, walking out of the club's back door, and down the alley with a dead end. They turned around to head back in the direction they had just came from, then froze. Two men approached them, one with bleached blonde hair, the other with black hair.

"Ooh. Look at him. He's a hottie." The blonde said, addressing Tim in a flamboyant tone.

"Great." Tim's voice was laced with frustration. "Gay muggers. Why the hell not?"

"Not exactly sweetness." The one with black hair said. The four watched as the faces of the "muggers" changed. Their eyes turned gold, their teeth elongated and their foreheads grew rigid.

"Ah shit." Tim said, he and the three women backing deeper into the alley, against the wall that prevented their escape.

"Scared?"

"What are you?"

"Take a guess. What do ya think?"

"I think four to two. I like those odds." Tim moved towards the vampires. They looked pretty scrawny. He figured he could take both on himself. Until one pushed him and sent him flying back into the three women and to the floor, hard.

The dark hair vampire went to Tina. Bette stepped in front of her girlfriend and punched the vampire as hard as she could, then held her hand as pain from the hit coursed through it. The vampire stared, the exploded into a cloud of dust.

"Oh God!" Bette cried, thinking she'd killed someone. The dust cleared and a tall man, strong looking with black clothes, spiky brown hair, and dark, piercing brown eyes appeared. Bette screamed and went to hit him. He caught her hand before it could make contact and her eyes widened. She opened her mouth to scream again when he cut her off.

"It's okay. We're the good guys."

"Angel!" They all saw a young woman with shoulder length brown hair calling the dark man. But Angel didn't get the chance to see her. He turned and was met with a fist to the face from the blond vampire. "Angel." Cordelia tossed a wooden stake. The wrong vampire caught it. "Oops."

"You need to not help me Cor."

"Sorry." The blond vampire came at Angel, stake in hand. Angel attempted to dodge, but the sharp tip cut into his flesh. Angel growled and let the transformation wash over him, features now matching that of his opponent. The added speed and strength from the transformation had him dusting the other vampire in seconds. Cordelia made her way to the four bystanders.

"You okay?" She asked Tim, helping him to his feet. Angel rolled his golden eyes. Something, had she been looking, Cordelia would've laughed at. He put his hands on his hips in frustration and a smidge of jealousy, which he'd never admit to.

"Yeah. I'll live." Tim reassured.

"Where were you guys headed?" Angel walked up to them, standing by Cordelia possessively, unaware that he was still in his vampiric state. The four stepped back.

"What are you?" Bette asked.

"What do you think?" He asked, face returning to that of a normal man.

"He's a vampire." Cordelia said flippantly.

"Cordy-"

"What? You are."

"Vampire don't exist." Jenny said, trying to convince herself something she had thought to be true for years. Cordelia glared at her.

"Don't say that."

"But-"

"You wanna see the fangs again?" Angel asked.

"Bust-" Now Tim started and Cordelia cut him off.

"No. You can't say that when you were almost killed by two then saved by another. Denial much?" She shook her head, then turned to Angel. "You ready?"

"Yeah."

"Good. Let's go." She playfully smacked Angel in the stomach, directly on the new wound. He let out a cry of pain and stumbled forward, clutching the area.

"Damn it Cordelia!"

"I'm sorry! I forgot!"

"I got stabbed! How do you forget I got stabbed!"

"You don't have to yell." She looked at the other people. "You coming with, or what?" The group exchanged looks. They had been planning on going to Bette's sister's, where they had been before going to the club.

Now, curiosity got the better of them and they followed the two. "I'll help you with that concussion." Cordelia told Tim with a flirtatious smile.

Tim couldn't help but smile back. The girl was enchanting. Her smile made you melt. But she had an attitude that dared you to defy her. With his failing relationship with Jenny, Tim believed he might have a shot with Cordelia. If not for the tall, dark, apparently not human man...pire sending him a death glare.

Time gulped and followed Cordelia, wincing as he passes the other "man," who then quickly caught up with her again.

"We have enough room in the car?" Cordelia asked Angel.

"We'll make room." She sent him her 100-watt smile, and he could only return it. "But he's not sitting upfront with us." She rolled her eyes.

"Careful Angel. Your jealousy is showing." He stopped and stared after her, stunned. She kept walking, the four people following her. All he could do was continue to stare after her and smirk.

PART TWO

A limping Angel, followed by Cordelia, led the group into the hotel. The four looked around, impressed with the large building. They had expected something a little less extravagant for a vampire.

"Nice place." Better said. Angel was about to respond when Cordelia did it for him.

"Thanks. I decorated and cleaned the entire hotel. All Angel does is pay for it." Angel snorted as he removed his leather duster and went into the kitchen area.

"Yeah. Because the thousands of dollars I fork out on this place doesn't compare to your amazing ability to coordinate paint and furniture colors."

"See? He appreciated my talents." Cordelia said, taking a seat on the couch by Tim with the first aid kit and checking out the gash on his head. As she fixed him up, she continue talking. "I think I did a pretty good job decorating. You should've seen this place before."

"It was livable." Angel defended his hotel. In the kitchen, he searched the fridge for his liquid diet.

"Pfft. If Angel had his way, he would've lived with the spider webs and made friends with the spiders." Angel glared from the other room. And though Cordelia couldn't see him, she felt the glare. "Angel, I'll do that for you in a second," she said, referring to the blood, "get in here so I can patch you up."

"I got it Cordy." Angel said, still out of sight. He pierced the packet and drank, grimacing at the cold temperature. He threw the empty packet away, the lifted his shirt slightly, looking down at the slash mark marring his abdomen. When he walked back into the lobby, he caught a whispered statement from Cordelia about the large red pentagram on the lobby floor, and how that was not a part of her decorating plan.

"I did what I had to do Cordelia." The icy tone had Cordelia turning around, shocked.

"I just meant that-"

"I know it was wrong. It nearly cost Fred her life. But I would've done anything to get him back."

"I know Angel." Cordelia said, patting the now empty seat next to her. Angel sat down with a soft groan. "I'm just saying, it's not likely to be featured in a home styling magazine." He smiled.

Cordelia unbuttoned his tattered shirt, scrunching her face up at the long, deep up just below his belly button. Everyone else's expression matched Cordelia's as they watched her patch the vampire up.

Except Jenny, who looked on intrigued. Beneath the dark clothes that let him blend in with the shadows, Angel was a good looking guy. But his last statement made her question her attraction. She was about to ask the question, but Time beat her to it.

"You would've done anything to get him back?" Tim asked, hopefully. He might have a shot with Cordelia yet. Angel furrowed his brow.

"Are you asking me if I'm gay?"

"Well," Tina spoke for the first time. "My gay-dar is going off. Bette?"

"Yeah." Better turned to Angel. "You dress really nice. Straight guys don't really own multiple silk shirts and we've seen you were two already. You wear leather, you're hair is almost perfectly spiked-"

"And you even have really nice taste is women's clothes too." Cordelia added with a smirk. "Anything you wanna tell me Ang?"

"I'm not gay." Angel said, ignoring Cordelia. "And if I was, you're not my type." Angel told Tim, who stared horrified.

"Not interested bat boy." Angel growled.

"Vampires don't turn into bats." Angel shook that off. "Anyway, when I said him, I meant my son."

"You have a son?" Jenny asked.

"I did." Angel looked down at his bandaged torso, then up at Cordelia and gave her a faint smile. "Thanks." He stood up and walked to the staircase. "You gonna be able to make it home okay?"

"Angel-"

"It's okay Cor. I just...I need to be alone for a bit."

"If you need me-"

"I know. Thank you." He walked up the stairs, disappearing into the darkness, untraceable until the closing of his door was heard. The group of five sat in silence for a few moments until Bette spoke.

"Is he going to be okay?"

"Yeah. He's just still copping with what happened to his son." Cordelia said, staring at the stairs.

"What happened?" Cordelia turned back to Bette.

"It's a really long story."

"Well, we're too far from our own homes to walk, and it's too late to get a cab. I think we have time." Cordelia nodded.

"Get comfortable. Like I said, long story." Though all five of them knew they could get home, the four were actually interested in Angel's past.

PART THREE

Angel hadn't been able to sleep like he had intended. Sleep was a welcomed interruption of the constant though of his missing son, lost friendship, and a love that would never be returned. When he was asleep, his mind still held his emotions, but things were altered. Conner was still here, Wesley had never betrayed him, and he had Cordelia's heart.

But sleep hadn't come, allowing Angel's mind to focus on everything that had gone wrong right when it had seemed things would work out, and why it was obvious his life was meant to fall to pieces.

Sleep almost came to Angel, when he felt something strange. His senses were on high alert and told him that something was wrong. Angel leapt out of bed, tugged on a clean pair of boxers and black pants, then grabbed a white A-shirt and black button up shirt from the closet.

He moved quickly out into the corridor and down the stairs, pulling the A-shirt over his head as he entered the lobby, the froze as five pairs of eyes stared up at him. Why were they still here? It was nearly five AM. He could feel sunrise approaching. He had brought them here at one AM.

"Hey Angel. What's up?"

"I, um, why...why are you all still here?"

"We were talking."

"For four hours? About what?"

"You."

"Me?"

"Yup." He furrowed his brow, then shook away his thoughts. He had come down here for a reason. He had come down here for a reason.

"I thought I sensed something."

"So you rushed down here half naked to check it out?" Angel pulled the A-shirt down, then looked for the other shirt he had brought with him. He looked back to the stairs, realizing he'd dropped it.

"Clothes aren't an issue when you're fighting. Or when you think you're alone." He said, turning toward the staircase to get his shirt. Jenny smiled.

"I really got a thing for tattoos." Jenny said, indicating the gryphon on Angel's back. Angel turned around and raised an eyebrow, pulling the shirt over his shoulders. Tim glared at her and Angel, Cordelia just glared at Jenny.

"Not this one." Cordelia said, not hiding her jealousy at all. Angel smiled mischievously at Cordelia's possessive tone. He looked at Jenny who stood defiantly, exchanging a glare with Cordelia. Getting in the middle of the two would only get him in hot water. The again, that's where he liked it.

"It's not my tattoo that's usually getting checked out." Angel said in a husky voice, passing by Jenny. She blinked, her attention turning from Cordelia to Angel. She could see why.

"You're trying to distract me," she said, turning her attention back to the fuming Cordelia. Angel chuckled softly.

"Jenny." Angel put a hand on each of her shoulders, running his hands down her arms softly. She gave a small shiver of delight and he sent a sexy smirk her way. "If I wanted to distract you," he ran a hand up her neck, cupping her cheek, "you really think I'd bother with talking?" Jenny's heart flip flopped, her head was spinning, making her dizzy with wonder.

Tim stared in shock. If he wanted, Angel could wrap Jenny around his finger as if Tim wasn't even in the room. He looked to Cordelia, who nearly growled in jealousy.

Angel moved away from Jenny, buttoning his shirt, sending Cordelia and innocent smile as he passed by her, whispering, "Careful baby. Your jealousy is showing."

"Watch it Angel." She warned. he was about to respond, when his senses picked up again, and his body stiffened. Angel felt them coming. All of them. Too many for him to take. "Angel?"

"Go."

"What?"

"Go. Now. Take everyone down through the basement and into the sewers."

"To where?"

"Don't know yet. Just go. I'll catch up with you."

"I'm not leaving you."

"Cordelia."

"Angel, the macho vamp Alfa-male bullshit doesn't work when you're out numbered by, what? About twenty five?"

"Damn your new demon senses. And it's twenty.

"Come with me or I'm not going."

"Cordy."

"I'm serious Angel."

"Fine." He hurried everyone to the basement door and opened it for them, rushing everyone in. He stood outside the door with Cordelia.

"Caritas."

"Huh?"

"Caritas. Lorne just got it up and running again. And he's got the sanctuary spell up."

"Perfect."

"Get there and stay safe."

"Angel-" before she could argue with him, he pulled her roughly to him in a fierce kiss that left her motionless. She blinked, and the door was closed in front of her. "Angel! Open this door!"

"Cordy, go!"

"Damn it Angel!"

"Cordelia. I can't risk you getting hurt. Get them to Caritas. Now." Though she didn't want to leave him, she knew she had to help get everyone else some where safe.

"Let's go." Cordelia led the four through the sewers.

"I thought you said he was romantically challenged?" Tina asked Cordelia as they made their way to Caritas.

"He is."

"Didn't look like it back there." Cordelia absent mindedly touched her fingers to her lips, not even noticing the angry Jenny and pouting Tim.

"Yeah. Guess he did."

When Angel knew they were gone, he backed away from the door. He couldn't risk Cordelia getting hurt. Not when he's just gotten her back to himself. Losing her would be akin to yanking his fingernails off one at a time.

He shook that off and walked to the weapons cabinet, grabbing an axe and a sword, bracing himself for the fight to come.

PART FOUR

Cordelia paced back and forth by the bar of Caritas. Lorne watched her go back and forth, back and forth, until he had to avert his eyes and take another sip of his Sea Breeze.

"Sweetie, please. For all our sakes, sit down." He said, addressing the other four people. At first, the entire group had been reluctant to stay here. But eventually, Bette and Tina warmed up to the stage and graced the Karaoke bar with a few numbers.

Jenny seemed really nervous around everyone. Everyone copped it up to being in a bar filled with murderous demons. But Lorne had noticed the young woman's nervousness as soon as she found out he had the ability to read minds. Since then, she had been very careful not to so much as hum a tune that was played.

"I can't sit down." Cordelia argued. "I'm worried enough as it is. If I sit down I'll think more, then I'll be even more afraid. He should've been here by now!"

"Listen Cordelicious. From what you've told me, he had his work cut out for him-"

"What if he didn't win? There were a lot of them. What if-"

"Give Angelcakes some credit. He can hold his own."

"I hope so." Lorne took another drink.

"I hope so too Sweetie." Time continued to progress, Cordelia continue to pace, and Bette and Tina graced the crowd with another number. They had just made their way back to the table when the doors to Caritas bursted open.

Angel walked towards the group, looking beat and bloody. His eyes held determination and anger as he approached the group, focused on one person only. But that determination and anger was extinguished when Cordelia threw herself into his arms.

Angel's only focus now was her. He encircled his arms around her sweet, supple waist, pulling her to him. She wrapped her arms around his neck. A few moments passes and Cordelia pulled away, then smacked Angel on the arm.

"If you ever kick me out of a fight again-"

"I had too."

"Yeah, well, next time, you're gonna be in a whole lotta trouble mister."

"Trouble." Angel's mind switched back to what he had come here for. "Everyone outside now." He said, pulling Cordelia with him. Everyone else followed, confused. Angel led them outside. As soon as he was sure they were all outside, he stalked past Cordelia to who he had been determined to get to before she hugged him.

"Angel, what's goin...Angel!" Cordelia screamed as Angel went to Jenny, grabbed her by her throat and pushed her hard up against the building wall. Tim's eyes widened and he went to Angel, trying to yank him away from Jenny. Angel pushed him and sent him flying to the floor.

"Who sent you?" Angel asked Jenny. She tried to gasp in air, but Angel's hand prevented any large gulps. He allowed her just enough air to keep her conscious and answer his question.

"Let her go!" Tim yelled. He, Bette and Tina, all tried to pull the vampire off of Jenny. He ignored them, his pressure increasing, feeling as though he'd crush her windpipe.

"Who sent you?"

"I don't know what your talking about." She said, it came out choked against his hand.

"Who!"

"Angel, let her go." Cordelia tried to help pull him off. He wasn't budging.

"Show me your face." Angel yelled at Jenny.

"This is-"

"Show me your face!" Angel growled, vampire out. The four tried to pull him off. His pressure on her throat increased and Jenny couldn't take it anymore. With a growl of her own, her entire appearance changed. She grew taller, her skin grew a gray color. Ridges appeared on her face, no longer appearing human. Her shoulders grew broader and claws sprouted from her fingers. Those claws ripped into Angel's arm and he released her.

Tim and the two women stared at what Jenny had turned in to. Cordelia grabbed Angel, bringing her to him. He allowed her to, staring at the demon before him. He turned to Cordelia, tilting his head towards the group as he spoke.

"You might wanna get them out of here."

"I'm not leaving you again."

"They're not going to want to see this."

"Then they can leave. Me, I'm staying here." Angel nodded, then approached the demon, picking up the sword he had left outside.

"Did Wolfram & Hart put you up to this? Have you make your way into our home? Set up the vampire attack? I hope they made it worth your while." The demon smiled, then spoke in a high grating tone.

"Definitely." Angel growled and charged. Tim, Bette and Tina watched, not sure how they wanted this to end. Jenny was a friend, and a part of Tim still loved her. But she had put them all in harm's way. And from what Cordelia had told them earlier, Wolfram & Hart was out to destroy the good in the world. Jenny was a demon and had sold out to them.

Angel battled, but the long, sword-like claws matched his sword, got a hold of it, and sent it flying. Angel dodged the fatal swings of her knife-like nails that resembled that of Wolverine from X-Men.

Cordelia moved to the sword as Angel battled the demon. Angel fought with everything he had, receiving multiple wounds in the process. He saw behind the demon to Cordelia, who was raising the sword above her. He could handle the injuries as long as she'd patch him up later.

Cordelia brought the sword across, slicing the demon's head from it's body. It fell to the floor, and Angel took an instinctive step back as it dropped. Cordelia moved to him and hugged him. He held her back, placing a kiss to the top of her head.

"I love that your good with a sword."

"Yeah, well, you were getting sliced and diced out there. Had to do something." The two turned to the three shocked bystanders. Tina and Bette clinged to each other, both obviously still in shock. And Tim, Tim looked on with his broken heart apparent in his eyes.

PART FIVE

A patched up Angel and Cordelia bid farewell to their three new friends as they entered the cab. Cordelia gave Tim a quick peck on the cheek and told him not to worry, he'd find someone who he was meant to be with. But she assured him, much to Angel's relief, that that person couldn't be her.

"Figured as much." He said. "Besides, I wouldn't want to go up against the competition." He said, addressing Angel. Cordelia smiled.

"Not many people do." Tim shook Angel's hand, and gave Cordelia a quick hug. He entered the cab with the two women. They watched the two leave, then went back inside the hotel. Cordelia walked past Angel and to the phone, ordering a pizza. She was starving.

Angel sat on the couch as she made the phone call, waiting for her to come over to him. She finished the call, walked over and sat next to Angel. He wrapped an arm around her casually, bringing her to him.

"So, Angel..."

"Yeah?"

"What is it with you and demon skanks?" She asked, addressing Jenny. Angel stared down at her in surprise. "I mean, it is a little freaky."

"Well, in case you haven't noticed, I'm just a little bit of a freak." Cordelia raised an eyebrow.

"That a promise?" Angel smiled.

"I'm not sure. Considering the only girls who like me are psychopathic or evil, I don't know if I should get involved with anyone right now." Cordelia looked insulted.

"You calling me psychopathic? Or evil?"

"Nope. And evil." She went to smack him on the arm playfully, and he caught her hand in his, lacing his fingers with hers. "But I think I'm willing to risk it."

"Good." She tilted her head and he brought his lips down to hers in a sweet kiss. Angel nearly lost it. The kiss was perfect. Heaven with a side of incomprehendable bliss.

He brought her closer to him, hand tilting her head to give him better access. It always amazed him how the least expected near disaster could lead to a happy ended.