a/n: This is a parody of the dreaded Mary-Sue OC-Insert character type, and her quest to win over Sasuke Uchiha while fighting bandits, saving the world; just like a Mary-Sue should. Her character will develop, but for now let me introduce to you my very own take on what one should be like... I'm proud, or maybe ashamed, to introduce:
Prologue:
Hi, I'm Merry Liz'beth-Swan Gull'ble Starshine Shoe, but don't worry, you're not expected to remember me by my unique, beautiful name. You can just call me Merry Shoe, but whatever you do, don't call me Mary-Sue!
I have flowing, perfect golden hair; so much better than that vain-bitch Ino's. My eyes are that of the most flawless amethyst, and glisten in the moonlight especially. My skin is light and glows like the sun itself. I often get mistaken for Kate Winslet or Scarlett Johansson.
I'm a half Jinchuuriki, who is unfortunate enough to share the nine-tailed monster with the super-nerd Naruko Uzumaki... ugh, how could anyone mistake her for being the child of prophecy, I'll never know... I mean, Sasuke so deserves that title more than that ugly whiskered-shit! Anyway, I like to call her Whisker-Yolk, it's fitting, don't you think?
I'm seventeen years old, but although I'm one of the most talented, amazing Shinobi this Village has ever had the privilege of having; I'm only a Genin. I sometimes cry myself to sleep some nights, knowing that I'm a hidden gem, but in plain view... I feel so unappreciated at times. My otherworldly powers are that of Genjutsu, so I can invade other people's minds and overwhelm them with my spectacular beauty, although Sasuke has somehow managed to resist it so far...
Oh, and I forget to mention; I am the child of the prophecy. The old doddery fool Jiraiya and those scummy frogs clearly experienced an episode of Alzheimer's while having their vision of the prophecy; how else could they mistake me for that whiskered-yolk?!
Well, I know you want to find out even more about my complex character (and who doesn't?), but right now I'm on a drab mission with Team 7, which is both wonderful yet distressing, enough to make even my eyes lose their glimmer. Why, you ask? I'm with the hottest jock in the village, Sasuke... but also two nerdy air-wasters; Sakura and Naruko. The pink banshee is so obviously jealous of my superior skills and looks, as Sasuke is sure to fall head over heels for me eventually!
But about my dislike of Whisker-Yolk? When we are both near each other, which is distressing for me enough already, the 9-tailed fag allows us both to hear each-others thoughts! I know what you're thinking, "Oh no Merry Swan Shoe! How do you stop that ugly nerd hearing your brilliant thoughts?!", well it's quite simple, I can't!
There's no need to feel sorry for me, but I know the urge can be overwhelming sometimes. I'll just have to try to blackmail the little scrub if he ever hears some of my genius thoughts not meant for the outer world. Also, the 9-tailed prick stops my Genjutsu working on her, so even my godly powers can't stop it.
Right now our mission is to get a scroll from the Sand Village; a meagre task for my abilities, I know, but at least It'll give Sasuke a chance to finally tell me his true feelings before we get there. Unless something bad happens to interrupt it, like a bandit attack, the village getting destroyed or even if Sakura opens her huge, pointless mouth.
So there you have it, to summarize all this amazing knowledge in simple terms for my admirers; My name is Merry Liz'beth-Swan Gull'ble Starshine Shoe, and I will win over Sasuke!
Merry Swan Shoe's Theme: Mean Girls Soundtrack - Pass That Dutch (Plastics Anthem)
Please do review, following update speed will depend on how much feedback I get! I hope you're looking forward to seeing Merry Shoe's adventures, until then!
