As I watch our teacher hit on our tour guide, I wonder if Pin ever pursues anything whole-heartedly. I openly doubt it and forget I ever wanted to know.

"What are you talking about? Of course I have."

I didn't really want to know. I didn't really expect a yes. Of course he has.

As I head for my room, I catch myself pondering how I've never believed Pin to be a man who wants and feels things. All this time, I forced myself to equate him to loudmouth with no perspective. It's not the first time for me to find myself discrediting another human being having of the natural thoughts that humans have.

I've noticed the way Pin works for my class. He wants us to have the best experience possible. Even after I fell into an emotional lapse about my failures compared to Chizu and Sawako, he still tried to make me feel as good as possible. I still buried inside myself the fact that Pin cares about a lot more than most people would guess. No matter how nice he is to me, I'll still close that door.

For some reason, I don't want his honesty to be real. I don't want his kindness to be real. As much as I strain to believe I'm alright and I have to depend on myself, I'm always overwhelmed by the impression that Pin thinks I need him. I don't want to need him. I don't want him to smile at me ever again.