Okay, so I'm trying something different. We've got a lot of poetry going on in this fandom, but do we actually have plays? I don't think we do, but if you know any Supernatural play then feel free to point it out to me and bring my ignorance in that matter to an end.
Anyway, I decided to give it a shot. Funny thing is, it all started because I wanted to write but had no prompt idea. A little while later this insanity was born. My mind is a wonderful place. Please tell me if I should go on with this or bury it somewhere deep inside my head and pretend I never posted it.
Bobby's living room. Sam is sitting on the couch, lazily surfing on his laptop. Bobby's at his desk, chin in hand, turning the pages of a book that doesn't even seem to interest him. Castiel is standing by the window, with his back to the wall and his arms crossed, looking deep in thoughts. Dean is restlessly pacing the room with his hands in his pockets.
DEAN. How long's it gonna last?
SAM (without looking up). You know as well as I do that there's no way to tell.
DEAN. Yeah but last time it went on for what? Three years? Four years?
SAM. Two years.
DEAN. Felt like more than that.
SAM. These things aren't so easy, Dean.
DEAN. Then why is she doing it?
SAM (finally looking at his brother). You do know you're being a brat, right?
DEAN. You're the brat.
SAM. Very mature.
DEAN. Bitch. (He waits for Sam's infamous answer, but his brother remains silent) Uh, Sam?
SAM. I'm not gonna give you the pleasure.
DEAN (throwing his arms up). Whatever! (He turns around and notices Castiel is still gazing into space. Dean walks up to him.) Hey Sam, check it out. (He's standing very close to the angel, waving his hands in front of his face. Castiel doesn't flinch.) What is he, a statue? (Dean leans in inches from the angel's face, looking into his eyes as if trying to see through them.) Man, he'd look great standing in front of Buckingham Palace!
CASTIEL (startling Dean). Stop it, Dean.
DEAN (taking several steps back, a hand on his chest). Geez, Cas! What are you trying to do to me?
BOBBY. Maybe if you stopped bitching around and annoying the hell out of everyone...
DEAN. I'm bored! We've been stuck here like this with nothing to do for over two years and still no sign of a change. All we can do now is sit here and wait to see what she's gonna throw our way but I'm telling you, if we have to take two more years of that I'm gonna blow my brains out.
SAM (with a scoff). Bet she'd like that.
DEAN. Nah, she's got a new target now. (He pointedly looks at Castiel)
CASTIEL. It's not my fault. If you think I enjoy her... attention-
BOBBY. Yeah, the girl likes you two.
CASTIEL. I would gladly pass on that.
DEAN (to Bobby). You do have a point though. How come she never comes after Sam and you?
SAM. Dunno. Not really sure I care either. At least we're safe.
DEAN. Yeah right. As if anyone was safe around her.
The door is suddenly thrown. Enter Balthazar with a bittersweet smile on his face. He barely took a couple of steps in the room when the doors slams shut.
BALTHAZAR. Howdy, boys.
DEAN. Welcome to Hell, buddy.
CASTIEL. I was really hoping you'd escaped her.
BOBBY. Not a chance. Once she gets you, she never lets you go.
BALTHAZAR. Yes, she seems to like me very much and wanted to add me to her collection. And apparently, what happened two months ago only increased her interests.
DEAN. Well don't go complain. At least you and Cas got to do something.
SAM (to Balthazar). Whoa hold on one sec. Didn't you die like the very next week?
BALTHAZAR. It hardly seems to matter now, does it? What matters is what she's gonna do to us.
DEAN. Damn straight. Besides almost everyone here has died a coupla times. We're not gonna start fussing over it now.
CASTIEL. Right. If we are here, it means she has plans for us.
BALTHAZAR. Wonderful.
SAM. You don't say.
Balthazar walks up to the cabinet, takes a bottle of scotch and two glasses. He pours two drinks, walks up to Castiel and hands him a glass. Castiel looks confused for a second before he takes it with a small nod.
DEAN. Hey, how come we're not getting drinks?
BALTHAZAR. Because you guys are not my brothers.
DEAN. What does that have to do with anything?
BALTHAZAR (with a big smile). Nothing.
He seems to think it's a good enough explanation and goes to stand next to his brother. Dean huffs and goes to get the bottle of scotch and three glasses, pours three drinks and gives two of them to Sam and Bobby, glaring at the angels all the while.
BALTHAZAR. So, how long do you think it's gonna take?
CASTIEL. Don't start that debate again.
SAM. Yeah, it's getting kind of annoying.
BOBBY. Kind of?
BALTHAZAR. Excuse me for wondering how long I'm gonna be doomed here with you.
DEAN. You never know, with that bitch.
SAM. Dean!
DEAN. What?
SAM. Watch your mouth, she might hear you!
DEAN. What's she gonna do, kill me? Because that would be new!
CASTIEL. What your brother means - and I have to agree with him - is that there's no need to provoke her. You never know what she might come up with.
BALTHAZAR. I concur.
DEAN. Yeah, what do you know about it, Balthazar? You barely even know her.
BALTHAZAR. I know what she's capable of.
The door opens again, and in comes a very confused looking Crowley. He whips around when the door slams shut, startled. He turns back to look at the boys.
DEAN. Okay now this is ridiculous.
BALTHAZAR (sarcastically). New arrival! Scotch all around!
CASTIEL. Balthazar...
CROWLEY. What on earth is going on?
BOBBY. She's got you.
SAM. You're stuck here just like us.
CASTIEL. There's no escaping her.
BALTHAZAR. All you can do now is sit back, relax, and see with what sauce you'll get eaten.
DEAN. "See with what sauce you'll get eaten"?
BALTHAZAR. French expression.
DEAN. Ah.
CROWLEY. What are you talking about? Who is she? And what are we all doing here?
BOBBY. We don't know her real name.
SAM. Around here she calls herself 'nerwende90', though we call her Nerwende.
DEAN. Worse than any creature on earth or in hell, that chick.
BALTHAZAR. And the inevitable has happened.
CROWLEY. What?
CASTIEL. Her muse has deserted her.
I don't even know.
Okay, so what do you guys think? Should I go on?
In case you didn't get the hint, reviews are appreciated. A lot.
nerwende
