The Night Watch



I do not own Harry Potter (though I'd really like to, if you know what I mean), and I do not own Are You Being Served or its character's.

Chapter 1: Poor Professor Dumbledore

Professor Dumbledore sat asleep behind his desk. The door opens and his secretary comes in, Miss. Bakewell. Red hair, young, and very pretty. She gently nudges him. "Professor Dumbledore? Professor Dumbledore? Wake up sir." "Huh?" he asks waking. "What is it?" "It's nearly closing time." she replies. "Oh yes. Thank you Miss, er, Bakewell. I think I have strength enough for that now." "Very good, sir. Oh, Mr. Bond from packaging is waiting outside. Will you see him before you go?" "I don't see how I could miss him." Dumbledore said, misunderstanding. "I'll tell him you're just leaving and to make it a quick one, sir." "What's that?" "A quick one, sir." "Well, alright, but I'm afraid I'll need another nap afterward." Mr. Bond knocks and enters. "Excuse me, sir, Professor Dumbledore." Mr. Bond said. "Yes, what is it?"Dumbledore asked. "Sorry to interrupt your kip," Mr. Bond said, "But that lot of executive furniture what you ordered just came off the lorry, and seen' as it's so close to closing time, I need your approval to shift it off the dock." "You need my approval?" Oh, yes, sir. Our duly drawn and ratified union contract specifies that after we go over our monthly allotment of overtime, I 'ave to get a personal OK from you, Professor Dumbledore." "Over your monthly allotment? But it's only the fifth of the month!" "Yeah, you're driving us to our grave, sir. But we're going in style ain't we? Heh-heh!" he said nudging Miss. Bakewell, who frowned and left. "Is that all?" Professor Dumbledore asked. "Oh, yes, an' the maintainance staff have mopped up most of the water what's on the Third Floor, but the carpets still dead soggy." "Yes, Mr. Snape said those waterbeds were a bad idea." Dumbledore said. "It wasn't the waterbeds, sir." Mr. Bond leaned in. "It was the plugs." "Yes, well, has the defective merchandise been taken off the floor?" "Mr. Snape helped load it into the furnace personally, sir." "I see. Well, thank you Mr. Bond." But Mr. Bond stayed at the desk. "Is there something else Mr. Bond?" asked Professor Dumbledore. "Well," he said looking bashful, "Sir ...aren't you going to say I've done very well?" "Get out Bond." Bond frowned and left, and when he did Miss. Bakewell came back in." "Ah, Miss. Bakewell. I think I'm ready to go now." Professor Dumbledore said. "Yes, sir. But I'm afraid Mr. Lupin has just come up to see you. He says it's very important." "Now I shall definitely need a nap."