Once upon a time, Sephiroth played Halo and he pwned! LOL!

Then Sephiroth thought, "What if Master Chief was real? OMG! I would so love Master Chief!"

Then -poof- Master Chief appeared in front of Sephiroth. Sephiroth immediately undressed Master Chief from that stupid armor that makes Master Chief less sexy, and went to be with Master Chief. But outside Sephiroth's home, something was amiss.

Someone said, "That two-timing Master Chief! He's supposed to be mine! I'm gonna kill him!"

Goku turned SSJ 100 in a fit of rage.

"Behold, I am angry! My brows are furrowed because I am angry!" yelled SSJ 100 Goku.

But Goku wasn't the only one outside Sephiroth's home. Vash the Stampede was, too. And he was angry that Sephiroth two-timed him, too. So, SSJ 100 Goku and Vash kicked down Sephiroth's door and charged into Sephiroth's room. Sephiroth and Master Chief were in the middle of making hot steamy love, so they got mad when SSJ 100 Goku and Vash interrupted them. Master Chief pulled out two rocket launchers, because he can dual wield rocket launchers, and fired them at Goku and Vash. But Goku shot eye beams from his eyes, and the rockets exploded in Master Chief's face.

"No!" Sephiroth yelled. "Not my Master Chief!"

But Master Chief survived, because his skin in made of titanium because the Halo novels say so. And with his titanium errect penis longer than Sephiroth's sword, Master Chief hit Goku on the head and made his nose split open. Vash was angry, and his brows were furrowed, so he grabbed Master Chief's penis and broke it off. Master Chief yelled, and then Sephiroth stabbed Vash in the eye with his sword. And then Sephiroth cut off Vash's head.

"I'm not a man anymore," cried Master Chief.

"What?" Sephiroth yelled. "You don't have a penis to put in my butt? That's it! We're through!"

"But Sephiroth, I thought you would love me no matter what!"

"Forget you, I'm going to go get Cloud. Or maybe Barret... I hear black guys have big penises."

And so Sephiroth left Master Chief, and Master Chief died a lonely death. When Sephiroth tried to get in bed with Cloud, Cloud killed Sephiroth. So everyone died.