Crying could be heard from behind Graces bedroom door. She was lying on her bed, sobbing into her pillow. She didn't know where Will had gone; only that he had fled the apartment after the big fight they just had. One month, that's all I asked for, and it wasn't even for the reason he thinks it's for… Grace thought to herself has she lifted her head off the pillow, revealing a huge tear stain. This has nothing to do with Leo. Her face was marked with the mascara that ran down her face when she started crying. She sits up and pauses, placing her head in her hands and letting out a deep sigh that she seemed to be holding in since Will told her to get out.
She gets up and walks out of her room and into the bathroom where she turns on the hot water and begins to rinse the black from her eyes. She towels her face dry and returns to her room where she walks over to her dresser and opens up a black music box that has her name inscribed on the top in sparkling silver cursive. A soft lullaby takes flight when she opens it and the melody flies around her, putting her into a kind of trance for a few seconds... Grace closes her eyes for a moment, remembering the time she first got the music box. It was a gift from Will. He had given it to her as an apology for coming out to her the way he had over thanksgiving break. She remembers the whole scene as if it were yesterday, how her mother and Julius knew it without actually knowing, how her sister said she always ruined everything and how she kicked him out. She was so angry with him and so sad at the same time. She was so in love with him, and he didn't even know it.
A tear escaped her eye and flowed down her cheek and dripped onto a folded up piece of paper in the music box. She took the paper out, slowly unfolding it and read it silently to herself,
Dear Gracie,
You don't know how sorry I am for what I have done to you. It was wrong of me to ask you to marry me with no intensions of going through with it, especially when I finally knew who I really was…gay. It breaks my heart knowing how mad you are with me and that you moved off campus and won't return my calls. I miss you, you know. Your smile and that little snort you make when you laugh hard enough. I hope you know that I never meant to hurt you. I love you. I love you more then anything, Gracie. I hope you can find it in your heart to forgive me.
Sincerely yours,
Will
"I love you too, Will," Grace said aloud as another tear escaped her eyes once again. "More then you'll ever know." It hurt so much to admit it to herself but that's how she felt about him. She didn't want to be affectionate with him anymore. She knew it didn't signify what she wanted it to. She stopped giving him those little pecks on the lips before she'd leave for work and those hugs as well. She also stopped cuddling with him on the couch when they watched sappy movies together. it was just about killed her every time he'd kiss her when he got home from work because it didn't mean anything to him, just a "Hello I'm home" To her she wished it was a deeper kiss that said he loved her like a lover…not as a best friend. Yes, she was falling in love with him all over again. She tired to hide it from herself ever since the baby talk began but she couldn't hide it any longer. She didn't think a baby was a good idea anymore. Not if it had to be done this way. It's a big step in the wrong direction you could say. You should both be in love with each other when you decide on something as important as this. Grace thought. But that's impossible, and that's why I cannot go through with this baby. I…I just can't.
Grace turns around and slowly makes her way back to her bed. She pauses and remembers all those times when she'd be sick and Will would bring her breakfast in bed. And all the times he would crawl into bed next to her, cradling her close to him when she had a nightmare or was depressed about a lost boyfriend. If only he had only done it for no reason at all. Because he wanted to be near her, feel her body warmth against his. But that was impractical. Grace finally pulls down the covers and slides under them. A new waterfall of tears starts to flow as she slowly drifts off into an uneasy slumber.
