I'm writing this songfic to channel my anger. Heh. Not many people know what my anger is centered on, but there is a reason for it, and the reason will be sorry one day. Don't worry. Bygones won't be bygones one day in the end. I love me some Black Label Society. This is set to Stillborn. You can listen to it on Yahoo! Launch, just like most of my songfics. Enjoy, and R&R.

Blind me, erase what was
Stillborn I have become

Glaring down the barrel of a pistol never came so easy as those last couple of years. Seifer often told himself that it wasn't his fault, that she was just a bitch. Hah. Who know? He didn't know anymore, and he probably would never know. He didn't know if he could stand it anymore, didn't know if it was worth it. He'd busted his ass for so many years, just to provide, just to show love. Things didn't matter anymore to him. She didn't matter. Screams of despair blended in with the flow of things, hiding the streak of blood in the clear water. Pain didn't matter, and pain would never be his excuse for bending to her will. Why did he care? He waited for her, waited so long and now there was no chance of her wanting him anymore, was there? Years and years of persecution seemed to be insignificant to what the girl had done to him, and it was obvious that he was well past anger. What did it matter? His child didn't matter to her, his life didn't matter to her, she sure as fuck didn't matter to him. Nothing would change that. He wanted to scream, wanted to hit something, wanted to kill. Wanted to die, wanted to KILL. His pain, converted to anger, was the smiting force that made everything come to a head. She WOULD pay.

The feelings I once felt are now dead and gone
I've waited here for you for so very long

His steps rang throughout the small corridor as he gripped his blade as tightly as he possibly could. Black pants stained with new blood, his face was cut up and dirty, blue eyes sharp with vengeance. Want of vengeance. Gloves coated in blood, he turned to the door. One boot coming up harshly, he slammed it into the door, right beside the knob. The door snapped open with a loud crack and a sound of splintering wood. Two screams were heard from inside, a child's and a woman's. Quistis stared up at him as she clutched her child close to her body, the blonde-haired, blue eyed child hiding her face in her mother's chest. Seifer glared coldly at Quistis and held his hand out for the girl. However, the woman held tightly to her offspring and shook her head. "Then I'll fuckin' take her." Quistis stood and shoved her child behind her, standing up to the larger man. "Give her to me. Now. Did you really think that little bastard would protect you from me? Bull shit. You ran to him, now you can make a fuckin' family with him. Oh, if you can pick his guts up off of the ground. Now gimme my kid." Quistis glared pure hate at Seifer and shook her head.

So empty, just a shell of a man
Stillborn, this I understand

"Give her here, or you won't live to see his fuckin' funeral, bitch." Seifer radiated anger, something that scared Quistis into clinging to her child even more than she already did. She wrapped her arms around her and held her close as Seifer advanced. He snatched at her arm and shoved her toward the wall, causing her back to snap against it rather hard. Whimpering in pain, she looked around for a weapon, but found none. "Cause me pain, I'll cause you pain. I'll leave if you give me my daughter. Just give her here." He wielded Hyperion rather skillfully, slicing out at Quistis's face. He almost skimmed her nose with the tip of the blade, but it missed by a hair. She let out a yelp of fear and closed her eyes, started to cry. She slowly released her daughter, pushing the little girl toward her father. Seifer reached out and accepted the child, her little pudgy arms wrapping around her father's leg to cling tightly. Her mumbles of fear were yet more pain to scar his heart, but he would never hurt her. Never. He glared at Quistis and pointed Hyperion at her, the click of ammunition heard as he loaded the gunblade. "Nice. You know what, why don't I just send you to the pearly gates with the fucker?"

"Please, Seifer, no. Please don't do this." She sobbed and lowered her head, a tremor of fear going through her body. She knew Seifer wasn't bluffing, and she knew he wasn't past killing anyone that stood against him. He'd done it so long ago, and she knew that he would seriously kill her. "Please, don't do this. She's watching. You don't want her to see that, do you?"

"What, trying to save your own god damn neck? The amazing Quistis Trepe dropped down to this level, did she? Begging and pleading like the whore she is?"

"I'm not Quistis Trepe. I'm Quistis Alm-"

"No, you're Quistis Trepe. Fuck you. I never wanna see your ugly face again."

The feelings I once felt are now dead and gone
I've waited here for you for so very long

"C'mon." He tugged at his daughter's arm, causing her to whimper and stare at her mother. "Come on. She ain't got shit for you. She doesn't love you, she loves her 'male friends' that she brings home every night. Jus' like she dun love your daddy no more. Come on." The little girl blinked up at Seifer, then stared back at her mother. Quistis squirmed from the gaze of betrayal, started to sob harder when Seifer planted that thought into her head.

"YOU BASTARD, I LOVE HER! I HATE YOUR GUTS!"

"Hate away, bitch. You hate anything that came from me. I know you do. You hate me. You hate her. She don't need you now, she's got her daddy. He don't bring three different women home every night. He fuckin' works his ass off to make money instead of sitting up in a house and doing nothing. He don't make his lover's rival guard him so that he won't get hurt. Seifer Almasy fights for himself. He don't push his own daughter aside when she wants to play just so he can romp around with a whore. You bitch, you aren't a mother, and you will never see her again."

I've waited here for you, so long

"I'll kill you before you take her away from me."

"Wanna bet? I'd love to see you try to fuckin' kill me. The last time I checked, you're just a fat ass that doesn't do anything but whore around. You don't fight anymore. You let your husband handle the fighting, because you're too good to get your damn hands dirty. What, how're you going to kill me? Are you gonna hit me? Wow, you're gonna hit me, aren't you? I'll knock you flat on your ass if you hit me."

I've waited here for you, for you.

Quistis stared down at the floor, then up at him. "You were never around. How in the hell is something supposed to stay faithful to you when you're not around? You expected me to sit here with a daughter and not see anyone? Not talk to anyone besides her? Damn, Seifer, do you really think I planned this out?"

"Yeah, I think you planned it out. How in the fuck could I be planning to come home for the weekend after busting my ass off in Galbadia if I was never around? What the fuck was I doing when I wasn't around? Shit for you. Supporting my kid. Sending you money to put food on the table, and making sure she had money to go to school on. Has she even fuckin' started school? Can she spell her name? Does she know her alphabet. Six years old, and I bet she doesn't even know what her name starts with. You didn't even try to teach Kelsie, did you? You didn't try to help her get her education, you didn't use any of the money I sent except on your own selfish ass. That's why I'm through. Oh, and I'd watch my back. The next lover might go squish, too."

The feelings I once felt are now dead and gone
I've waited here for you for so very long

"I dare you Almasy."

"It's not nice to dare me to do shit, because most of the time I end up harming something. Remember this? Remember Hyperion? She ain't scared of loppin' your head off. I'll kill you, and you never forget it. Look over your shoulder every night to make sure I'm not there. You never know when I'll be lurking in the shadows, waiting to shove my blade through your heart. I'd check my back seat before I got in my car, too. Heh. Be scared, bitch. Be very scared, and always remember that I can kill you and hide your body where no one will ever find you. No one will miss you when you're gone, anyway. No one will care. After all, you did just drop off of the face of the planet. You're probably holed up somewhere, too scared to come out, unless you would stain your pretty little hands, eh? Remember me. Remember me and Kelsie, and remember our eyes. Because you might just be staring into mine as you die, bitch. I'll make sure she knows what her mother was, too. Never count on seeing her again."

Quistis stared at the door as Seifer slammed it, the bloody handprint that his glove left causing her vision to blur. She shook her head, tears streaming down her face as she pulled the knife she'd had out of hiding. She would've used it, wouldn't she? She knew she would've if it came to her or her daughter's life. Things seemed to blend together, to cause more remorse than ever. Life didn't matter. "I waited for you, so long.. You were so far away. You didn't hear me." Slowly, she drew the blade across her wrists, opening up her vessels to pour out the liquid life that remained. Hyne knew she had no other type of life left.

I waited here for you, so long

I waited here for you, so long

I waited here for you, so long

I waited here for you, for you.