Our Shameful Desires

A/N: I will not be making many authors notes in this story, because I don't really want to disrupt it. This is the first slash story I've ever written, and I am glad that it centers around a pair I love so much. Aaw, I love Pippin. But well oh well, he's with Merry. DON'T DENY IT, YOU KNOW IT'S TRUE. Jeez.

Disclaimer: What are you talking about? I own them, all of them! What, you think I possibly took them from somewhere else? J. R. R. Tolkien? Who in the world is that? …Okay, he's the owner of these characters, all of them! Are you happy now?

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Chapter One: Confessions

            Meriadoc Brandybuck and Peregrin Took. Two young hobbit tweens that were known around the Shire for being inseparable, and renowned for being the main cause of trouble. If anything queer were ever happening, such as waking up to find that half of the vegetables from your garden are gone, the general consensus would be that they were behind it. You could not get too angry at them though, as they were only irresponsible young tweens; Merry being twenty-nine and Pippin being twenty-one.

            Of course, it was just as abnormal when it seemed they weren't plotting anything; and when this would go on for days on end, the hobbits of the Shire would become even more unnerved.

            "They're going to think we've repented when we don't blow the Shire up," Merry mused to his companion. "That's what some people are saying, you know. That we're going to blow it up."

            "So gossipy," Pippin sighed, resting his elbows on his desk. "They've been jittery for days. It's sort of…amusing." He paused. "So, are you sure farmer Maggot's finally let his guard down?"

            Merry waved a hand. "Oh definitely, I've been checking. For the first week we didn't show up he sat on his porch with a pitchfork. He's given up on us since then, or at least that's what he wants us to believe."

            That was why they had been keeping out of trouble. While the rest of the town became even more suspicious, they waited for farmer Maggot to waver. They wanted this week's thievery to go smoothly. For once they had thought their plan through, as the call had been far too close the previous time. As soon as Merry had bent down to filch a few mushrooms, the dogs came rushing through the grass. They managed to escape with only a couple of scratches, yet they were empty handed.

            They were going to make up for that now.

            "So Merry, what you're saying is, we're either going to get enough vegetables to last a month, or we're going to die?"

            "Yep, that's pretty much it."

            Pippin made a noise much like a frightened puppy.

            They would take bags, and fill them as much as was possible, as long as they could still run fairly fast. And if all went well, they would make a second trip.

            "All right, it's about time for luncheon. He'll probably be inside. Let's go."

            Pippin's eyes widened. "But Merry…I'm hungry!"

            The older one pulled his friend from the chair he had been reclining in. "You can wait, Pip. It's worth it."

            "But Merry—!"

            "Come on!"        

-

            The two quickly made their way to the edge of the property, trying not to be seen by the other hobbits. They did not want to draw attention to themselves. Those who did see them however, cringed and continued on with their business.

            Pippin agreed when Merry suggested it might be better if they split up. He would have preferred they stay together, but Merry was older, and probably knew more of how to go about things than him. Still, Pippin held on to the paranoid idea that the dogs might find him. He replayed the vision in his head over and over again. They would catch onto his scent, and be upon him before he even had time to scream. Besides, any opportunity to be near Merry was not to be wasted…

            Pippin mentally slapped himself for thinking such thoughts. If Paladin ever knew…but worse, what would Merry think?

            The said hobbit had only been walking for less than a minute when he came across the first cabbage patch. He bent down to inspect them, shoving the best cabbages with no rotten spots into his bag. He left the damaged ones for farmer Maggot.

            All was going well thus far. After he had gone through some carrots, he decided he had a fairly good load. All he needed were some mushrooms. The farmer was no where to be found, and most importantly, neither were his vicious dogs.

            The dogs. Merry shuddered, remembering how close they had come to him the last time; snapping at his heels. Shoving the memory from his mind, he wondered how Pippin was doing. The thought did not linger, and rapidly traveled elsewhere.

            "Mmm, mushrooms…"

            Merry knew exactly where they grew. The first time, it had taken a while to find where they thrived. They were not familiar with the seemingly infinite maze of grass then. Nevertheless, they discovered the mushrooms, and as soon as the area was found, it was not forgotten. Merry found it quite quickly, and promptly finished filling his bag to the top. Slinging it over his shoulder, he cut through the grass to make a faster path. When he emerged, Pippin was no where to be seen.

            Merry dropped his bag under a tree and ran a hand down his face.

            "Pippin…where are you?"

            Sure that his stolen veggies would be completely safe where he left them, Merry ventured back onto farmer Maggot's property. He dismissed the thought that perhaps the dogs had found him. He would have heard Pippin scream for help. A smile played over his face as he thought of the high-pitched, frantic way Pippin screamed.

            He wouldn't have had heard Pippin scream if he didn't have time to scream.

            The smile left Merry's face. He swallowed a large lump in his throat, and frenetically began tearing through the grass. He was making so much noise himself that he was unable to ear the pounding footsteps and gasping behind him.

            "Merry! Help me!"

            Merry whirled around. Not far behind him, and catching up quickly, was Pippin. Merry could justify by the way Pippin was running that something had happened to one of his legs, and he was combating pain with every step he took. This pain would have been nothing compared to the bite of the dog that was pursuing him. Yet, not wanting to be a disappointment, he still held tight to his own bag of stolen vegetables.

            "Pippin, you fool! Drop the bag or give it to me!"

            Pippin shoved his sack into Merry's arms and continued running. Merry followed after him. The dogs would stop chasing them as soon as they got off the property, considering they made it.

            "What happened to you?" Merry asked in-between ragged, gasping breaths. "There's—there's blood on your bag!"

            Pippin made not an attempt to answer, and continued to sprint as fast as his legs could carry him.

            They did end up making it without being ripped to shreds, albeit barely. Merry threw his friend's bag near his own. Pippin leaned against the tree and sank to the ground, breathing heavily.

            "I'm not sure," he said, answering Merry's question now that they were out of danger. "I was just about to grab some potatoes, and the dog was just there. Either it bit me in the leg or I stepped on something. I don't know, but I fell. It bit my arm, so I punched it right in the face with my free hand and ran." He cringed. "It hurts, Merry."

            Merry knit his eyebrows together. "Don't worry; I'll get you home all right. You need to stop using that leg. I'll carry both the bags and you can lean on me."

            "Can you handle all that?"

            "I'll manage for you."

            A chill went up and down Pippin's spine. He tentatively placed a hand on Merry's shoulder and steadied himself on one foot. Merry glanced down at the one he held up.

            "For goodness' sake, Pippin!" he exclaimed. "You're not sure if it bit you? Ridiculous! That huge gash did not appear out of thin air!" Pippin looked sick.

            "Don't worry," Merry added rapidly. "I can fix it up easy. Just think of the mushrooms I managed to get, and how good they'll be."

            Pippin winced and laid his head down on Merry's shoulder as droplets of crimson blood dripped down his ankle and onto the ground, not giving the slightest thought to mushrooms. Following Merry's lead, Pippin hopped back to his hobbit hole. It took much longer than usual, though, as Merry was weighed down by two full bags of vegetables and supporting some of the weight of a seventy-pound hobbit. Eventually they made it. Merry abandoned the bags in the hallway, and led Pippin to his bedroom.

            "All right, take your shirt off."

            Pippin's breath caught in his throat. "W-what, Merry?" he choked.

            "Take your shirt off," Merry replied impatiently. "I need to see if the heinous beast got you anywhere else."

            "I don't think…" Pippin pulled his shirt up over his head, revealing another lesion on his side.

            "Oh, I…it definitely didn't bite me there. I must have scratched it on something when I fell."

            "Does it hurt much?" Merry pressed down on the skin near the cut.

            Pippin lurched forward, clutching at his side as pain mingled with delight. "Yes, Merry," he whimpered. "It hurts. Please don't do that again."

            Merry looked into the hobbit's pathetic, pleading eyes and could not defy him.

            "All right, all right. Calm down." Merry pet the top of Pippin's head, smiling. "I'll fix you up. Just stay here and don't try to walk."

            Pippin obediently stayed where he was, tilting his head backwards to gaze at the ceiling. His companion headed to the kitchen.

            'Does he? Could he? Don't fuel this temptation, Merry. It's not natural.'

            Merry returned with a wet cloth and bandages. The bite on Pippin's left arm was fixed first and quickly. Next he moved down to the cut on Pippin's side, leaning in far too close for comfort. The younger hobbit sat remarkably stiff the entire time, biting back pain and fighting a strong urge to wrap his arms around Merry and tell him everything. Right then and there. Everything he felt.

            When Merry reached the laceration above Pippin's ankle, he was in just the right position for Pippin to receive a strong whiff of his scent. Pippin inhaled deeply. Merry smelled, as one might have expected, earthy. Pippin absolutely loved it. It wasn't just earthy. It was different. It was Merry.

            Merry finished bandaging the last wound and rose to his feet. "How's that?"

            "Wonderful…" Pippin replied, sighing almost drunkenly.

            "What…?"

            "Uh, you know, I mean…it's fine." Pippin wished he could sink down into his sheets and disappear.

            His companion had other plans. In one swift movement, he yanked Pippin off of the bed and wrapped his arms around his neck.

            "Oh come on, Pippin, everyone knows you can't resist me," he said jokingly.

            Pippin barely fought off a heart attack. "Merry—" he gasped, "What are you doing?! Let me go; it hurts!"

            'Know by now not to listen to a single thing I say...'

            Pippin's words prevailed over his thoughts. Merry dropped Pippin back onto the bed and crossed his arms.

            "Please, you know it's true." He grinned devilishly, seeming to think the entire thing was hilarious.

            "So…so what if it is, Merry?" Pippin blurt out. He bit his bottom lip, willing his threatening tears to stay hidden behind his eyelashes. "…So what if it is?"

            Just then, Merry didn't feel much like playing around anymore. He stared at Pippin in shock.

            "And let me guess," Pippin continued, looking up at him. "Now you're going to say, 'For goodness' sake, Pippin, what is the matter with you? How disgusting. I was only joking.' So just say it now and get it over with. Then you can go back to your house and leave me here, embarrassed and foolish."

            He was staring at the floor now, unable to look Merry in the eye.

            "It's probably for the best, anyway. My father wouldn't—" But Merry cut Pippin off in the most unexpected, astonishing way, causing his tears to finally spill over.

            "Damn your father," Merry said, breaking the kiss. "It does seem, Pippin, that I like you quite a lot too."

            Neither of them heard the door open minutes later. Neither of them heard the footsteps approaching the room. And neither of them saw the hobbit that stood in the doorway, staring at them in silent horror.

            No, that could not be his son.

            He would not believe it. He could not believe it.

            Neither would he accept it. He drew a deep breath.

            "…PEREGRIN TOOK!"

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