As much as River Song complained about her husband's fashion sense, she secretly loved it.

Because it was her husband, through and through. It just shouted the Doctor – all that tweed and plaid and other hideousness wrapping up such a beautiful man. It was like how his young-looking body hid the truly ancient being inside. Or how his youthful exuberance hid the Oncoming Storm.

Because, yes, she married the Doctor. Which technically meant that no matter which regeneration he was in, he was still her husband and she was still his wife, but he didn't recognize her most of the time. And a lot of the times that he did know her, he didn't know her.

But the clothes always helped her to know who she was dealing with, almost as much as – if not more than – the face did. She hadn't been kidding when she told him that she occasionally needed the spotter's guide in order to tell which was which. They all wore some truly ridiculous pieces, but some stood out more than others did.

Her husband's fourth regeneration was just plain silly looking, what with that scarf and everything. And those spats! She was just glad that her Doctor hadn't dug them out again.

The fifth Doctor had such lovely hair, all blonde and fluffy, but for Rassilon's sake – a celery stick? Really?

The sixth face of River Song's husband had brilliant hair. Rather like hers would be, River mused, if she was a man. And oh my lord, that coat! It looked like a rainbow had thrown up on him!

The tenth Doctor was pretty, that was a fact. That hair, especially – spiky yet soft. And oh, he was just so adorable! He could do the puppy eyes nearly as well as her Doctor could!

The twelfth Doctor was nice, as well. At least she didn't feel like she was old enough to be his mother – although in reality he was over twice her age. He dressed like a magician, though, with that red velvet lining in his coat. But it was rather adorable, after all. And the eyebrows alone made him look scary enough as is.

Then there was her husband. River Song's Doctor. The one that she had first met, and had first married (although she did marry the others at points in her life). The one that had the face of a twelve year old (not really, of course – maybe a 17 year old) but dressed like an old man, and who was obsessed with silly hats. Only her Doctor would take the time to dress up when he was dying, and only her Doctor would even think of using a bow tie in lieu of wedding rings.

So yes, River Song loved her husband's tastes, although she was loathe to admit it. While she teased him about it constantly, every time she saw that bow tie it made her happier.

Because while they were all her Doctors, only her Doctor – the first one she met, and the one who she had pledged her heart to (the first time) - had that bad of taste.

And only her Doctor wore bow ties.