Notes: Don't read this. I'm serious. This isn't even funny.
Warning: Fandom cherry-popping, ergo no experience with the characters
"Guys, guys!"
Nagisa's voice rang out across the rooftop like a cheerful siren.
"Guess what day it is today!"
Mokoto looked up from his lunchbox and gave a confused smile. "Monday?" he tried.
Nagisa shook his head vigorously. "No, silly!" he exclaimed. It was unclear whether he was shouting because of his disappointment in Makoto's wrong answer or his general excitement over the date. Perhaps he was just bored. Nagisa shouted a lot when he was bored. (Makoto thought it was an endearing character trait.)
"It is Monday, though," Rei chimed in between rigorous gulps of a liquid that was allegedly some kind of protein shake but mostly looked like curd.
"That's not what I mean," Nagisa said, on the verge of his trademark killer pout. "It's July 7th!"
The expected euphoria failed to materialize.
Makoto and Rei exchanged a puzzled glance before turning to Haruka, who was — to no one's surprise — purposefully ignoring all of them in favor of some steamed mackerel. The silence dragged on. Nagisa cleared his throat. Makoto sighed in defeat.
"I'm sorry, Nagisa," he said dutifully. "But I'm afraid we don't understand. Would you please explain what you mean?"
"It's Tanabata!" Nagisa all but squealed.
"So what, you want us to haul bamboo around and write down our wishes on paper hearts like five-year-olds?" Rei asked in obvious distaste.
Nagisa made a noise akin to a dying baby seal. Haruka frowned at his chopsticks. Makoto was still wearing his confused smile because his grandmother had taught him to face imminent disaster with poise and dignity. Besides, the damage was done, no matter his facial expression.
"Well," Nagisa smiled venomously. "You don't have to celebrate it with us, of course. I just thought it might be a nice opportunity to have some fun together. I'm sorry, it appears that I was wrong."
Rei grimaced, torn between frustration and (righteous) fear of Nagisa's wrath. "I didn't—"
"Whatever," Nagisa said sharply, focusing his attention on Makoto and Haruka. "What do you two think?"
Rei's jaw twitched. "Are you ignoring me?"
"I think the gardening club is growing bamboo. Maybe we can borrow some," Nagisa continued, undeterred.
Rei huffed, adjusting his glasses, and rose from his seat. "Fine. Since I'm no longer wanted here, I'll leave," he said darkly, and then he was gone.
"Happy Tanabata," Haruka said to nobody in particular.
Happy Tanabata indeed, thought Makoto.
During self-study period Makoto sat down beside Haruka and whispered, "What do you think we should do?"
Haruka didn't bother to look up. "About what?"
"You know," Makoto said, but it didn't seem like Haruka knew. "About Rei and Nagisa."
Haruka shrugged. "Nothing. It's not our business if they're arguing."
"But aren't you worried? Rei's left the club!"
Now Haruka did look up. "That was his own decision." He paused. "He never liked water much, anyway."
Makoto reflected that he really needed to get normal friends.
"Nagisa and Rei broke up?"
"Not so loud," Makoto hissed, glancing about the empty hallway warily. "They didn't break up, it's not like that! They fought, and Rei quit the club."
"They fought?" Kou tilted her head. "Why?"
"Tanabata," Makoto replied simply.
Kou nodded slowly. "I can imagine it. 'We're not grade-schoolers!' Right?"
"Pretty much."
"And now you want me to help you fix everything?"
"I asked Haru, but he wasn't exactly obliging," Makoto said, looking tired. Kou could relate.
"So what's your plan?"
Rei stared at them, scandalized. "I'm not going to apologize."
"Yes, you are," Kou corrected with an assertion Makoto could never hope to attain. "You saw how much you upset him."
"Upset him?" Rei echoed scornfully. "He just went on like I wasn't even there! If anyone has a right to be upset, it's me."
"Listen, four-eyes," Kou said menacingly and stepped closer towards him. Makoto had no idea how she was doing it — after all she was four heads shorter than either of him or Rei —, but she was terrifying. "Nagisa cares a lot about the club and its preservation, so he works hard to maintain harmony between you four with events like this. If that means you have to decorate a bunch of bamboo, then so be it."
"But I-I," Rei stammered, to no avail.
"I don't care," Kou said. "This is one of the stupidest arguments I've ever heard of, and I don't want to waste my time with it any further. What about you?" Rei blinked at her in naked terror. "Yeah, I didn't think so. Now go mend what you broke."
Makoto had never seen anyone run that fast in his whole life.
"What do you want?" Nagisa asked, irritated. Rei figured he was lucky he hadn't slammed the door the minute he'd seen his face.
"I, err, I'm sorry," Rei muttered. "I shouldn't have made fun of your idea."
Nagisa looked excruciatingly unimpressed. "Who told you to do this? Mako-chan? Kou-chan? Both?"
Rei blanched. "Well, uh, that's—that's not important. What's important is that I'm here now and I'm sorry."
And then … Nagisa was laughing, what the hell, Nagisa was laughing.
"I'm sorry, too," he giggled. "I overreacted."
Rei felt like he was missing the integral part to a puzzle. "Why are you—I mean—I—I don't—"
"Sorry," Nagisa wheezed. "It's just, the way you're stuttering is so cute."
What.
"Is this some kind of trick? Am I in a parallel universe? What are you—WHAT ARE YOU DOING?"
"I'm hugging you," Nagisa answered pleasantly, wrapping his arms around Rei's waist, and well, that was just — that was just peachy, wasn't it.
Rei gaped, flushing, and wondered if he should faint or just go along with it. He did both.
