Author's Note - This was originally going to be a oneshot, but I've since decided that I am probably continuing it, depending on the reaction it receives. I hope you like. :)
Originally written for crayonsaremymedium's "A Challenging Challenge" using the following quotes:
Character 1: "We had a moment at the dinner table."
Character 2 "No! NO! We did not have a moment at the dinner table."
I originally planned this to be a more humorous fic, but it seemed to work out better this way.
xo
P.S. The italic part is a flashback, instead of rewording it and having it all Lily's dialogue as she's telling it.


James walked in to the Great Hall expecting few, if any, students at breakfast at such an early hour and although it normally wouldn't seem particularly early, the Hogwarts students rarely ever woke before seven, especially on a Saturday. That, however, was not what surprised him. Sitting alone at the otherwise empty Gryffindor table was none other than Lily Evans herself, known for being a late sleeper. He walked confidently across the large room and sat right down next to Lily.

"Hello, gorgeous," he said in a playful tone.

"What do you want, Potter?" she replied weakly.

Noticing her bloodshot eyes and the small bags beneath them, his tone became worried, "Are you okay?"

"Yeah, I'm fine. Just didn't sleep much. Don't worry about it," she said, stifling a yawn.

"What was wrong? Why couldn't you sleep?" James pressed, surprised that Lily was actually holding a conversation with him and desperate to keep it going.

"It was just- Never mind. Just forget about it," Lily said, turning her attention back to the toast on her plate.

"Come on, Lily. What happened?"

"Persistent, as ever," she muttered.

"Aw, but that's what makes me so charming," he said but quickly returned to his serious tone, "Please tell me. I want to help."

She visibly gave up: Her shoulders slumping and a resigned look flashing across her face.

With an exasperated sigh, she said, "Look, I'm only going to tell you because you won't shut up, got it?" At James' confirming nod, she continued. "Okay, but it's a bit of a long story."

James glanced around the empty room. "No sane Hogwarts student - other than yourself, of course - ever goes to breakfast before seven and it's just barely six."

"Six already? I've been here since before four. Well anyway, you're down here, what makes you think no one else will be?"

"Oh, sweet Lily-Flower, since when have you ever considered me sane?" James asked, to which Lily only rolled her eyes.

"Fine, but I've never actually told anyone this and you have to promise that you won't tell anyone."

Standing up on the bench, hand over his heart, James proclaimed, "I, James Charles Potter, swear on my honor as Head Boy-no! As Quidditch Captain," he corrected, as though the latter were more important, "that I shall never divulge any information about Lily Marie Evans' oh-so intriguing secret to anyone, including fellow Marauders, as long as I shall live." He bowed low with a flourish before sitting back down with a grin.

Holding back a grin of her own and ignoring the slightly creepy fact that he knew her middle name, Lily looked straight at James, "I don't want you to say anything until I'm finished, this is going to be hard enough without your commentary."

More serious this time, and plenty curious, James said, "I promise."

Lily could tell he was sincere and began to talk. "Well, it all really started on a night almost three months ago now . . ."


In the middle of the mid-August night, Lily awoke to a crash downstairs. Barely thinking, she grabbed her wand and hurried down the stairs to see what was going on.

Passing through the empty dining room, Lily called out, "Mum? Daddy? Did you hear that? Was that you?"

"Not exactly." The voice was coming from the living room and sent chills down Lily's spine.

"W-who are you?" Lily asked, not moving, scared for not only her life, but also her parents' and her sister's.

"Well, wouldn't you like to know, Mudblood? However, that is not a thing I've come to discuss."

"Lily?" She recognized her father's voice, lightly laced with panic.

"Honey, what's going on?" Her mother's voice was ringing with fear.

"Silence!" There was a bang and a scream. Her parents said no more and a cruel laugh pierced the air.

Without thinking for her own safety, Lily rushed into the room. Scanning the room with her eyes quickly, she found her parents tied back-to-back in a corner, scratches and newly formed bruises covering their faces, her mother stunned and her father silenced, and three masked figures standing less than ten feet from the doorway in which she stood. There was an unmasked figure standing in front of the others. Petunia was nowhere to be seen and (hopefully) still safely sleeping in her bed.

With a jolt, she realized that she recognized the unmasked figure from the pictures in the Daily Prophet.

"Voldemort," she muttered darkly, not allowing her fear to be heard. The masked figures could only be his followers, Death Eaters.

"Yes, that's right." He was now talking to her as though she was a small child. "Surely you know why we're here?"

Lily was silent, though she did know the reason for their unexpected and unwanted arrival. Voldemort, a prejudiced - for lack of better word - man,was obsessed with ridding the world of muggleborns (like herself) and taking control over the muggles. And now he was here for her.

Apparently taking her silence as ignorance, he said, "Hmmm, apparently not as bright as they say. Obviously a result of your filthy, muggle genes." A smirk was plastered across his face. "I am here to kill you."

A thought struck her through her panic, "The ministry is going to be coming. This isn't a wizarding house, they can detect whenever magic is used in a muggle house. New protection, it was in the paper last week." She didn't mention that if an Unforgivable was used Aurors would appear almost immediately, hoping he hadn't bothered himself with reading through the article, certain that he would try to torture her before killing.

"Ah, yes. I did happen to see that article. But we have enough time to do what we came for, they won't be here for a few minutes." His smirk grew, "So we might as well have some fun while we're at it. Crucio!"

She thought she heard a yelp of protest coming from one the three Death Eaters as she fell to the ground, but she couldn't be sure of anything at the moment, not through the pain. It was excruciating, she felt as though she was being stabbed repeatedly all over her body with white-hot knives. She was determined not to scream and was biting her lip so hard that it began to bleed, but tears were flowing freely down her face and a few whimpers escaped. After what felt like eternity, but was probably less than a minute, the curse was lifted.

Ignoring the lingering pain, Lily stood up on her shaking legs and glared spitefully. "So it takes you and three of your cronies to take on a couple of muggles and a student? And I thought they said that you were powerful."

"Oh, but you see, I rather like to have an audience when I kill. It just makes it all the better." However, as soon as Voldemort finished speaking, a series of cracks echoed throughout the room. "Ah, we seem to be interrupted."

A team of Aurors had appeared.

Voldemort quickly yelled, "This is just your warning, we'll be back!" before he turned toward her parents, yelled, "Avada Kedavra!" and turned on the spot, disappearing with a crack.

The three Death Eaters followed example, the one on the right grabbing, with a shaking, hand, the arm of the smaller boy next to him, as he was apparently unable to Apparate by himself.

Lily screamed in horror as she glimpsed her father's limp form before being pulled into the arms of an Auror with dark hair sprinkled with gray and glasses perched on his nose.

"Lily, you have to calm down," he said soothingly, his voice somewhat familiar.

She didn't even care how he knew who she was, all she cared about was the fact that her father wasn't moving. Her screams melted into sobs as she said, "I c-can't calm d-down! Voldemort k-killed him! Voldemort k-killed my d-daddy!"

"I know, and I'm very sorry, but I need you to calm down so I can take you to St. Mungo's without you getting splinched."

When Lily's hysterical sobs calmed down a bit, the Auror said, "I'm going to Apparate now, are you ready?"

Lily nodded and felt the familiar sensation of Apparition. When she was able to breathe freely again, she stepped away from the Auror and looked up at him and was shocked at how familiar he looked before it clicked, "Y-you're James' d-dad."

"That I am. Just a minute," he said before turning to look for a Healer. "Elizabeth! I need your help over here!"

A dark-haired Healer hurried over, "Charles . . . ?" She seemed to want to ask what happened but Mr. Potter shook his head almost indistinctly and the Healer turned her attention to Lily. "Follow me, please."

She led Lily to a room with on hospital bed and not much else in it. She ushered Lily unto the bed and said, "I'll be right back," before leaving the room.

Lily could hear her voice through the door, she seemed to be talking to Mr. Potter, who she now knew was the Auror who brought her to St. Mungo's.

". . . seems to have been tortured. It was Voldemort himself there with three others. He killed her father."

Lily heard a sharp intake of breath. "Does anyone else know?"

"Just the other Aurors. If the press gets a hold of this, they won't be allowed to use names, seeing as she's still a student, but it will probably be printed without identification and many details."

"Was anyone else hurt?"

"Her mother was stunned with minor injuries but should be fine and her sister was found unhurt and asleep in her bedroom. They are being informed now."

"How were the boys when you left home?"

"James and Sirius were both asleep and I left a note in case they wake up stating that there was an attack."

Lily knew that Sirius had been living with James, and deduced that the Healer must've been James' mother.

"Floo call for Charles Potter." A disembodied voice called.

"That's probably James. I'll go talk to him but I won't give him any details. I see you later, make sure Lily is okay." Mr. Potter's footsteps faded down the hall and the door to Lily's room was opened by Mrs. Potter.

"Hello, dear. I know that this has been a truly terrible night, but could you tell me if the Cruciatus Curse was used on you?"

Lily nodded silently, tears still cascading down her face.

Mrs. Potter rummaged in some shelves in a corner of the room and returned to Lily's bedside with two potion bottles. "The first one is for the pain and this one is a dreamless sleep potion. When you leave I'll give you a week's worth for the pain, which should be completely gone by then, and a load of dreamless sleep potions, they'll help immensely."

Lily nodded and drank them both quickly and was almost immediately drowsy.

"You get some sleep and I'll be back to check on you when you wake up." Mrs. Potter gave her a sad smile before leaving the room.

"Wait!" Lily called out and Mrs. Potter returned to the room. "Could you not tell James? Or anyone else really, but please don't tell him." Lily waited for Mrs. Potter's unsurprised nod before letting her eyes close and allowing herself to sleep.


". . . and now my sister blames me for my father's death and had vocalized it often before school started and I know that my mum believes it, too, no matter how many times she says it wasn't my fault."

While Lily had recounted the events of that horrible night, her eyes had become glazed over in tears but otherwise lacking in emotion and she had become choked up with tears more than once, but James had kept his promise to stay quiet. "I used my last dreamless sleep potion the other night, so tonight was the first night since then that I was able to dream, which brought both nightmares and horrible memories."

When James was sure she was finished, he asked tentatively, "Permission to hug?"

A ghost of a smile appeared on Lily's face for a moment and she nodded. He wrapped his arms around her and whispered softly, "I'm so sorry." He felt Lily's tears finally fall from her eyes onto his shoulder and hugged a little tighter. "For both your dad and making you relive it."

She shook her head, not moving from his embrace, "I had to tell someone, it's actually kind of better now. It was harder keeping it locked inside. Thanks for being stubborn."

James smiled a small smile, released Lily, and wiped the tears off of her face before looking her straight in the eye, completely serious. "It was not and is not your fault. You had no way of stopping Voldemort. He's too powerful, even for you, Miss Top-of-the-class."

A grin flashed across her face at the last comment, but it soon disappeared and she started to deny the first statement, "But if I wasn't a Mudblood-"

"Don't ever call yourself that, Lily. You can't help that you were born with powers and that Voldemort can't see that blood has nothing to do with character. It's not your fault."

Lily nodded, still a bit disbelieving, and James stood and said, "We should probably get back to the common room. People are going to be down here soon."

Lily nodded and grabbed his offered hand. "Thanks for letting me talk to you," she said, squeezing his hand before dropping it.

"Well, you had me worried. And now it would be my honor to escort you to the common room." James said with a bow.

Lily rolled her eyes and walked alongside James through the halls.

"Do you have any guesses on who the Death Eaters were?"

Lily's eyes temporarily clouded, "Yes, and you won't like them."

"Why?"

"Well, one would just make you completely infuriated, the second would upset one of your best friends, and the third, well, the third is just obvious."

"Who do you think it is?"

Lily bit her lower lip, "Fine, but in opposite order: Lucius Malfoy, um, Regulus Black," -James scowled and muttered "Sirius is going to kill him,"- "and, well, if I tell you the last one you'll probably kill him and I'd rather there not be murder at Hogwarts."

James expression grew cloudy, "That would be Sniv-" -a glance at Lily had him correcting himself- "Snape, then."

"Well, yeah. But please don't confront and/or kill him."

She could've sworn she heard him say, "I make no promises," but chose to ignore it.

"You look exactly like your dad, you know." Lily said, changing the subject.

James grinned, momentarily distracted, "So I've heard. I almost forgot you met my parents." His expression grew serious, "Now I understand why Dad wouldn't tell me anything about that night, he usually would tell me all the details. And I remember reading the article about, um, well, about that night. It never made since why there were not many details."

Lily nodded and noticed they had reached the common room, "Pax et amor," she said, to which the Fat Lady nodded and swung open.

"Lily! Where have you-wait, why are you with him?" Alice Prewett, Lily's best friend, asked suspiciously, staring at James.

"I went down to breakfast early and he was there," Lily said simply.

"But, why are you walking with him?" she asked, still thoroughly confused.

It was then that James decided to intervene with a cheeky half-truth, "We had a moment at the dinner table."

Alice raised an eyebrow and looked at Lily. "No! NO! We did not have a moment at the dinner table!" Lily's eyes were wide in denial and she shot James a warning glance, which he obviously ignored.

"Ah, yes. I suppose since it was breakfast you would say we had a moment at the breakfast table."

"No, we did not." Lily said word-by-word through her gritted teeth, sparks literally beginning to fly in the air around her, which should have been warning to James to stop, but he ignored it.

"Oh, I suppose we ought to tell the truth then," James said, thoroughly enjoying himself. Lily eyes widened in horror and had to restrain herself from hitting him. He now had the attention of everyone in the semi-crowded common room and said loudly, "Yes, we just ought to let them all know that we were off shagging in a broom closet, seeing as you don't want to lie."

A few first years screamed as a pillow on the nearest couch burst into flames and the tips of Lily's hair glowed with a fire that seemed to have no effect on her, a rather common effect of Lily's fiery temper.

Lily's entire face was flushed with anger and embarrassment, "No! We were not, you idiot! Fine, I'll agree with your stupid moment thing if you'll just shut up." She punctuated the last two words by elbowing him in the ribs twice. Hard.

"Oww, what'd you do that for?" James whined, to which Lily replied by elbowing him again. "Hey! That's abuse, woman!"

Lily raised an eyebrow, "You bloody well know that I am fully capable of doing much worse, James Potter."

"Why would you hurt a poor innocent student?"

"First, you are far from innocent or poor. Secondly, if you had the capability of acting like a human being for more than half an hour you wouldn't be under threat of my hexing. And third, I have not and will not ever be tolerant to your stupid, embarrassing, ridiculous lies."

"But when you're embarrassed you blush! And I love it when you blush! Like right now," James said grinning.

Blush fading, Lily grabbed Alice's arm and dragged her up to the seventh year girls' dormitory.

"Lily!" she shrieked loudly once they arrived in their room.

Alice was a very short girl, barely five feet, with long chocolate-brown hair that hung in curly waves down her back. Her eyes were a shocking shade of blue that you would never expect to see on a brunette. She had a very spunky personality, but could easily make herself serious. She was somewhat similar to the Marauders, except she knew when enough joking was enough. People had called her a bit of a walking oxymoron. She was very sweet and could make friends with anyone, well, anyone other than her other two roommates. She often got suspicious very easily and picked up on things most people would not, but could be trusting when it involved a friend… usually. She and Lily had been friends since they first met on the train in first year and they had been sticking up for each other since then. She had been dating Frank Longbottom, who graduated the year before, since her fourth year and they'd talked of getting married after she finished school. All in all, she did not seem like a very intimidating person. Keyword seem.

Now, as she stood in front of Lily, despite the fact that she had to look up at her because of their six inch height difference, she was very intimidating.

"How about you tell me the truth, because while I obviously don't believe that you were "off shagging in a broom closet," I do, however, know that something happened between you two."

"Nothing happened! I promise," Lily squeaked nervously.

Alice raised an eyebrow.

"Okay fine! We may have had a little moment. Nothing big!"

"Oh, yes, a moment with James Potter for you is just nothing. You were walking with him and smiling instead of hexing. Since when is that normal between you two?"

"Okay, so it's a little different. But for a little while he was actually acting like a human being with actual feelings."

"Fine, I'll drop it for now. But next time tell me straightforward if you're having moments with James Potter!"

Down in the common room, everyone heard Alice's high pitched shriek but was unable to hear any more of the girls' conversation.

James joined his friends, and fellow Marauders, Sirius, Remus, and Peter, in the corner of the common room.

"Did you really get laid before seven?" Sirius asked incredulously. "Maybe you aren't such a failure as a man…"

"If you listened passed the mention of shagging, you would know that I wasn't serious-and don't even think about using that stupid joke." James said quickly before he could interrupt. "And just because I don't have your reputation, that doesn't make me "a failure as a man." Honestly, you're like Amanda Thomas in guy form."

Amanda Thomas was infamous around the school as being extremely easy. She also happened to be Lily and Alice's roommate and one of the two people out of Gryffindor, Ravenclaw, and Hufflepuff who Alice truly didn't like.

"Prongs! That is just crossing the line!" Sirius looked genuinely hurt. "I am a much better lay that her!" Apparently not.

James raised his eyebrows.

"Well, it's true! And my reputation is not nearly as bad as hers!"

"Oh, well, then what's the longest you've had a girlfriend?"

"Two days, three hours, six minutes, and around twenty-seven seconds," he recited easily.

"Ooh, sorry, mate, she beat you by three minutes. It's official, you're worse than Amanda Thomas!"

Sirius sat back in his chair grumbling and Remus took over, "So what exactly did happen between you two? I'm afraid I'm not distracted quite so easily."

"Nothing, really," James said as to not let out Lily's secret.

"You sure? Because normally if you tried walking with her you would be hexed immediately. So something must've changed."

"Look, we talked a bit. Nothing more."

"Sure…" Remus said. "Anyway, we have to get down to breakfast."

"Yeah, see you guys later." James called as they walked off, Sirius still muttering "Three-fucking-minutes," and Peter silently following like a pathetic little puppy dog.


Around noon that day, James heard Lily tell Alice she was going to the library. Deciding to go after her to talk to her, he discreetly left the common room a minute later as to not get Alice suspicious.

He hurried through the halls, but when he got to the library Lily was nowhere in sight. He even checked the tables hidden by bookcases and the tables near the back.

Somewhat worried, he took a shortcut to the Entrance Hall to see if she was headed to lunch instead. When he arrived in the Entrance Hall, he saw a flash of red hair disappearing out the main door, despite the fact that it was raining hard and cold outside.

James slipped out the door and found Lily sitting in the middle of the grounds, head in her hands.

"Lily!" he called, running towards her. She didn't show that she had heard him, didn't move at all.

When he finally reached her, he sat down next to her and was silent, noticing the fact that she was crying and completely understanding why. If she wanted to talk, she could, or she could completely ignore him. He'd be there either way.

"Can you imagine what's it's like?" she asked with a shaky laugh. "I haven't cried since the night he died. Not even a little. I've been holding it in, hiding it within myself, making myself unable to feel anything. I left his funeral with dry eyes, I watched my mother suffer, unable to go a day without breaking down. I took my sister's blame and horrible insults and felt absolutely nothing. I haven't been living for the past three months."

"And now?" James prompted, content to listen to her talk.

"Now, it's-I don't even really know… I feel… free." Lily's eyes were still shining with tears, but they weren't falling anymore. "I haven't actually thought about my father since I left St. Mungo's. Until today. And I really miss him," her voice became choked up with tears that had yet to fall.

James wrapped an arm around Lily's shoulders and she rested her head on his shoulder. "Have you ever lost someone close to you?"

James shook his head, "Neither of my parents had any siblings and their parents all died before I was born."

"It's horrible, the absolute worst feeling in the world. I was always a daddy's girl," the tears began to fall again, "seeing as my sister took after my mother more and always openly disapproved of my dad's less serious nature. When I got my Hogwarts letter my mother was happy, of course, but my dad was ecstatic. Everything involving the wizarding world from that point on fascinated him. He insisted we needed to celebrate and we spent the day together, just the two of us, which is a rare occasion when you have a sibling. We got ice cream and just talked all day and it was undoubtedly the best day of my life. And then came the worst day, and he was gone forever." She was unable to talk anymore due to the uncontrollable sobs.

James pulled her into a hug and just held her until she stopped crying.

"It's okay to cry sometimes," James murmured into her hair.

"I know that now."

"You know it's down pouring, right?" James said with a grin.

"Yeah, I think I noticed," she replied dryly. Then she sighed, "It's always easier to cry in the rain."

"I know," James' answer surprised Lily.

"And would you know this from experience?"

"Just because I haven't lost someone yet doesn't make my life perfect," he said without unneeded elaboration.

Then spent hours just sitting, sometimes breaking the comfortable silence with a small conversation before falling silent again.

They just sat in complete silence for a while, until James remarked, "We've been out here for hours. It's after curfew. We should probably be getting inside."

"Yeah, probably," Lily replied, but neither of them moved.

It was only when they saw a lantern light at the door that James stood and helped Lily up, "We can sneak in while Filch is searching the grounds. The only problem is passing him without notice, but it shouldn't be too hard since it's so dark."

"And how do you know he won't see us?"

James grinned, barely visible through the dark night, "I've got the Marauder style. Filch is not a big problem compared to what else I've done."

"I don't doubt that," she said, grinning back.

As Filch passed, far to their left, James, pulling Lily by the hand, swooped to the right and hurried the rest of the way to the castle door and quietly slipped in.

"We're soaked," Lily whined playfully once they were in the safety of the empty Entrance Hall.

James pulled his wand from his pocket, pointed it at Lily, and she was immediately dry. He preformed the same silent spell on himself and dragged Lily up the many stairs, choosing not to take any shortcuts, until they finally arrived at the Fat Lady's portrait, talking and laughing.

"We have to go in separately or Alice will get suspicious." James nodded in agreement and Lily said, "Thanks for helping so much today." She pulled him into a hug for a few seconds before saying, "Wait a few minutes, then come in so I can be saved from Alice's wrath," and disappearing through the portrait.

Lily walked over to Alice, who shrieked, "Where have you been all day?"

"Oh, around," Lily said vaguely.

"What happened to the library? I looked for you there a while ago and you weren't there. And you broke curfew? Who are you and what have you done with the real Lily?"

"Alice, calm down," Lily replied with a laugh. "I was in the library but after that I was just roaming the corridors. You need to relax a bit."

Alice pretended to faint, "What do we do when our Head Girl is insisting we relax on breaking rules? Hogwarts' logic is falling apart!"

Lily laughed and continued talking to Alice.

When James entered a few minutes later, Alice stared at him and then back at Lily in confusion, "Were you-?"

"No, I was most certainly not with him," Lily lied calmly.

Alice's eyes narrowed suspiciously but she did not continue on the topic.

After about a half an hour, Lily yawned and told Alice she was heading up to bed. She fell asleep almost immediately, filled with dread that the nightmares would return.

Meanwhile, when James had entered the room he immediately joined his friends in the corner and received a similar interrogation, which the other boys eventually got bored with and moved on to different topics.

"I wanted to prank someone today," Sirius whined.

"And you couldn't have done it without me?" James asked with a raised eyebrow.

"It's never as good as when all four of us are in on it, you know that!"

James rolled his eyes and tried to ignore Sirius' new topic: All the girls he had "dated" that week. In other words, how many girls he shagged in the past week.

When the Marauders finally went to bed, far after everyone else, James lay in his bed awake while the other Marauders slept, thinking over the past day with Lily. He had always liked her, an attraction growing stronger each year, but only recently had he felt that he truly loved her. It was a bit absurd, they weren't even together and, until recent events, it had appeared that she hated him. It was something he couldn't fully understand, but he knew that he didn't truly need to. He still loved her.

As he fell asleep, he was still thinking of ways to help Lily deal with her father's death. She was beginning to actually acknowledge her feelings that she had bottled up, but it would take a while for her to truly be okay.

But for now, he would help her through it the best he could. He would protect his Lily-Flower for as long as he thought she needed it.


A/N - Please let me know if something confuses you or doesn't make sense. Sorry about the horrible 'fiery' pun, I couldn't resist. This chapter is honestly really long compared to my writing, so I hope you enjoyed it. Please review and let me know what you think. :)