A/N: I don't own Danny Phantom or Randy Cunningham: 9th Grade Ninja
"All I'm saying is if my boyfriend and your boyfriend got in a fight, mine would win" Sam concluded "it's just a simple fact"
The two girls had been going back and forth like this for a while now. It was supposed to be a fun little get together over coffee, but when the goth mentioned that her boyfriend, Danny Fenton A.K.A Danny Phantom, stopped an invasion on earth from the Ghost Zone, Theresa casually mentioned that her superhero lover, Randy Cunningham, or as he was better known as, the Ninja, had stopped an attack from the Realm of Shadows, it sparked a debate between the two friends on which had dealt with worse. For nearly a year now, Danny and Randy had been working together on several occasions, ranging from stopping Mcfist and Plasmius from making a monster from the two heroes combined DNA, to preventing the Ghost King and the Sorceress from unleashed hell on earth. Recently, the media had dubbed the duo 'the World's Finest' due to how well they worked together as a team, and the two had become almost like brothers in their time protecting the earth together.
Because of this unity between the two superheroes, it meant that Danny and Randy's circle of friends often intermingled with one another on occasion as well, one of those individuals being Theresa Fowler. Almost six months ago, Randy revealed his identity as the Ninja to his girlfriend after nearly two months of dating. Admittedly, the baton-twirler was apprehensive with the idea that the boy she loved could be killed in the line of duty, but she eventually accepted it, knowing that Norrisville needed the Ninja just as much as she needed the freshman under the mask. It wasn't before long that the purple-haired girl met Sam, who also shared her worries in dating a superhero. The two became fast friends, but this sudden subject as to which of their lovers were the stronger of the two was their first real argument. In all honesty, Theresa wasn't looking to start a fight, but no one, not even her friends, called her boyfriend weak.
"I doubt Randy would be taken down as quickly as you say he would" Theresa politely defended, still trying to keep things civil "he's fought, robots, monsters and evil wizards. He's had tons of experience of fighting things outside of ghosts and ghost hunters"
'Yeah, but Danny's done this longer" Sam countered "let's not forget that he's also saved the world on more than one occasion—and that was without any special training from a book"
"True, but the fact that Randy does have training give him an edge" her friend reasoned "the Nomicon contains over eight-hundred years of knowledge passed down to every Ninja, and through that, Randy has learned all sort of fighting styles and powers"
"Yeah, but can they hit Danny?" the goth pointed out "It's kinda hard to cut someone with a sword when they can just phase through it"
Aw yes, the old 'phasing' argument people often brought up during these types of debates. Theresa on occasion would look at online message boards to see people's opinion on this very subject, and while those arguments were filled with vile words, they constantly pointed out that Randy could not hit Danny due to his intangibility. However, Theresa knew something about the Ninja's weaponry that most people weren't aware of.
"Randy's weapons can cut noncorporeal beings" she stated
"Uh, come again?" Sam asked, clearly taken aback by that
"The weapons that the Ninja uses are forged in mystic metal that can cut into beings such as ghosts" the baton-twirler furthered her point
"Your making that up!" the other girl accused
"It's true. Randy told me so" Theresa defended
"As I recall, Randy's also the guy who tends to stretch the truth in order to look cool" Sam tensely reminded her friend
"Did you just call my boyfriend a liar?" Theresa questioned sharply
"I'm not calling him a truther" the activist said with a sly smirk
Theresa never wanted this to be a full blow argument, she hated getting into conflicts after all. But no one, absolutely no one, insulted her lover and got away with it. she didn't want this, but Sam started this spat, and now the purple-haired girl was going to finish it.
"It's funny that you call Randy a lair, because I distinctly recall Danny having the tendency to lie every now and again" she slyly began, knowing she struck a nerve "remember when we said he didn't sneak into the girl's locker room and you believed him? that was adorable"
"Because he didn't!" Sam snapped back "and least my boyfriend didn't hit on his best friend's older sister!"
"No, he just hit on a shallow brat while you stood in the background" Theresa fired back venomously "besides, Randy wasn't in control of his body when that happened. Which, compared to the number of times Danny's been mind-controlled or possessed by a ghost, is a whole lot less!"
The stunned look on Sam's face meant that she had been completely taken off guard by the other girl's sharp words. The goth didn't think that the usually timid girl would put up such a verbal fight with her. It was a mistake that most people made when they first engaged the baton-twirler in an argument. Theresa Fowler was not the one to pick fights, but she had a reputation for ending them with her opponent left questioning their very existence on earth, hence why so many people did their best to stay on her good side. Even the Ninja, who had faced the most horrific creatures one could ever dream of, feared getting into a heated debate with her. in all honesty, Randy would prefer to take her on in her monster form rather than having to face her in her human form.
"Yeah…well" Sam stumbled through her words as she tried to fight back "Danny can shoot plasma blasts and can control ice!"
"Oh, so now you wanna get back on topic?" Theresa commented with confidence in her tone "Ok then: Randy can deflect the plasma blasts with his swords. As for the ice powers, he has this little thing called the Tengu fire ball. And last I checked, fire melts ice"
"Well I doubt Randy can fly!" Sam fought back
"Ok, you got me there" the purple-haired teen admitted "But flying isn't going to do him much good when the Ninja shoots him out of the sky with an Air Fist"
"Danny has super-strength" Sam furthered "if he really wanted to, he could crush Randy's skull like a grape!"
"Then it's a good thing Randy's way to agile to be caught" Theresa furthered "since, you know, he's a Ninja and all"
Sam growled at the now smiling teen in front of her. She figured this would be an easy argument to win since Danny was one of the most powerful beings on the planet alongside the likes of SheZow and the Powerpuff Girls. However, it was quite clear that her friend wasn't backing down anytime soon. The two opposing forces sat silently, as they glowered at one another, silently waiting for the other to speak.
"What the hell are you guys doing?" came another voice
The two girls turned their attention toward Dann and Randy, who were currently standing before them in their civilian attire. The girls were so caught up in their argument that they had totally forgotten that their respective boyfriends were coming to join on their little get together to make it a double-date. Seeing that they had been feuding, the half-ghost facepalmed as he let out a sigh of annoyance.
"Every time…" he said "Every single time. You two just can't get along, can you?"
"We've tried so many times to get you guys to be a little friendlier toward one another, but instead you turn it into a Vag-measuring contest between who has the better boyfriend!" Randy added on, clearly irritated "News flash ladies: it doesn't wonking matter!"
"Danny, you need to fight for my honor right now!" Sam ordered, ignoring the boy's protests
"That goes double for you, Randy!" Theresa commanded
"I don't believe this, she never listens to me!" the half-ghost told his friend
"I know, right? It's like talking to a wall!" the Ninja agreed
"Well, I'm not letting their mood ruin our day" Danny said, "come on Randy, let's go watch Star Wars like we planned"
"Gladly" the hero of Norrisville replied
With that, the two superheroes turned away from their girlfriends, all the while singing 'you've got a friend in me' as they did. The two girls simply sat at their table left wondering why their boyfriends didn't do as they asked.
"Ugh, Men" they said distastefully in unison
