I couldn't tell you where I was planning on going.

At the time, I was just so angry. Work was stressing me out, and Chloe was trying to do something nice for me and it all escalated from there. It quickly turned into a fight about how much we'd been fighting lately. I can't recall the nitty gritty details of it all because it has since faded from my mind. Except, the one thing I vividly remember is how it was when I left. The scene is burned into my mind. Playing over and over like a reoccurring nightmare.

With the packed suitcase I had hidden away, all the money to my name, and the keys to my car, I just left. Chloe stood at the front door, bawling her eyes out, unable to speak anymore. Emily could be heard screaming and crying outside all the way from her second-story room. The sound haunted me each night as I curled up in the back seat of my car to sleep. My poor, sweet, baby Emily had no clue what was going on. All her young mind could process was that her mothers were yelling again, but this time, she wouldn't be seeing one of them for a good three weeks.

I was so mad that I ended up throwing my wedding ring onto one of the front porch chairs and just got in my car and left.

For the first week and a half of my leave, Chloe called and texted at all times of the day. Messages would be left, but I'd never listen to them. I just turned my phone to silent and let her keep trying to reach me. It only stopped completely because I made the decision to turn my phone off.

And now here I am.

When I woke up this morning, I had the plan to go home. The pain in my heart has become entirely too much for me to handle anymore.

I flipped on the GPS in my car and punched in my address with shaky hands. I don't know what exactly will be awaiting me when I get home, but I don't think it'll be good.

So for hours I drove on. I could feel my heart pounding faster and faster with each passing mile. I tried to distract myself by turning on the radio. It worked for a while until the scenery outside my car began to look more and more familiar. The sun was quickly dipping below the sky, bringing on nighttime. The loneliest time of the day for me. My stomach was twisting into knots.

Knowing now how close I was, I turned the GPS off. To get my head straight, I turned off the radio as well. I tried to come up with a plan. Nothing seemed like the right thing to do anymore.

I was roughly two miles out from my house when I began to feel something shaking me. I spent a good thirty seconds debating whether that was my heart or the car until I found myself off the road and just a foot away from wrapping around a tree.

Once I was able to breathe again, I grabbed my phone from the center console and stepped out of the car. My knees felt like they could buckle underneath me at any moment.

I pressed the power button on my phone and shoved it into my pants pocket to let it wake up while I examined the car. In the fading light, I discovered that I had blown a tire.

I was so close to home, yet something has to just keep me way. Maybe this was a sign that going back is a mistake. I don't care. I miss my family too much to be held back. I'll find a way back if it kills me at this point.

I pulled my suitcase out of the trunk and dragged it into the grass near the car. I sat down and brought the suitcase in front of me, opening a small pocket containing a bunch of family pictures.

I felt my phone buzz in my pocket. I took it out. The screen blinked to life. I stared at my phone background. It was a selfie of Chloe and I kissing. The nostalgic moment was interrupted by a pop up on the screen.

3 New Messages

Taking a deep breath, I opened up my voicemail. I pressed play and balanced the phone between my ear and shoulder. I picked up the stack of photos as the phone began its speech.

Monday, 2:06pm. Beca, please, just pick up your phone. We can talk this out. I was wrong, okay? I don't care anymore, I just want you home. I love you so much. Pick up your phone.

The message clicked off. I stared down at the first picture. A picture I took of her on our first date. I took her to the zoo because I thought it'd be fun. In the picture, she posed heroically on the back of a lion statue. A small smile played at the corners of my mouth.

Monday, 1:36am. Okay, I am getting really worried. Why aren't you answering my calls? I know you have your phone. Emily has finally cried herself to sleep. She keeps asking where you went. I'm wondering the same thing. I love you, okay?

Click. The next photo was from the first vacation we took together when we went to Hawaii. A really nice man offered to get a picture of the two of us. Chloe looked stunning. The light from the beach bonfire we were near made her glow. Her fiery hair framed her face like the prettiest picture the world has ever seen. I traced my finger down the length of her body, realizing just how much I missed the feel of it pressed closely to my own. Tears stung my eyes.

Tuesday, 4:45pm. I'm making your favorite dinner, in case you want to come home. It'll be right here on the table. All you have to do is come home. Please? I love you.

Click. The next picture was from the day I decided to propose. It was of her at dinner that night, sitting across from me showing off the ring. Her eyes were puffy from crying and so incredibly blue. I brought my hand up to wipe the wetness from my cheek.

Thursday, 3:08am. I can't sleep anymore. I can barely eat. Emily won't play anymore. I want you home. I love you.

Click. I could hear her voice cracking through the phone. The exhaustion evident in the messages. I was startled by the sob that escaped my own throat. This is all my fault.

Friday, 12:00am. Beca, this isn't funny anymore. It was never funny. I promise if you come back, we won't fight again. I need you here with me. I feel like I'm dying. Pick up the phone.

Click. Ice ran through my veins when she didn't say she loved me at the end of this message. I stared down at the picture of us at our wedding. Both of us standing up at the altar, holding hands. I remember bursting into tears the moment she walked through the door. I couldn't believe the beautiful woman walking down the aisle was mine.

Sunday, 6:30pm. I can't do this anymore. Emily asks me all the time where you are and I can't keep lying to her. I can barely look at her because she looks so much like you. God dammit, Beca. This is breaking my heart. You need to figure out what the hell is going on. I'm done.

Click. The next picture was of the day Emily was born. I laid there in bed with her all wrapped up in blankets in my arms. Chloe sat next to me, holding my hand. I remember she was so excited about Emily, that she almost broke my hand holding it so tightly. You could see the tears shining in her eyes. The amount of love in the way she looked at me killed me. I couldn't look at another picture.

I pulled the phone off my shoulder and dialed Chloe's number right away. As it rang, I shoved the pictures back in the suitcase and stood up. I decided to just walk from here. With my luggage in one hand, and phone in the other, I made my way home.

"Beca."

"Baby, this is all my fault. I'm so sorry." I choked out the words between sobs.

"Oh my fucking god, Beca, I thought you were dead. You leave for three weeks and don't say a word. You never answer my calls, never answer my texts-"

"Chloe I know, I am the world's worst wife. I get it. I screwed up. I'm so sorry. I miss you, I want you back. I want to see Emily. I want us, and our family, and all of it."

"You've got a lot of nerve calling me now."

"I know, this is all my fault. I have been completely useless without you. I've been living in my car for fucks sake. I'm sure you don't even love me anymore but if you do I want to come home and fix this."

I heard the line go silent for a while.

"Do you even realize how much I've missed you.."

I felt my heart completely break in my chest. I could tell that she had started crying. She began to speak again.

"I haven't been able to enjoy anything. I haven't been able to do anything. No amount of fighting is worth you leaving. I've been wanting you home for so long. Emily cries every night when you aren't there to tuck her in. I try to, but she always tells me it's not the same and that I can't do it like mommy does."

No matter how many times I tried to stop crying, it just wouldn't work. Every word felt like a dagger in my chest.

"Baby, I promise, I will be a better wife. I'll come home, and I'll be better. You and Emily are everything to me. Until the day I die, I want to be by your side. I want to watch Emily grow up, and help her through all of her relationship struggles, and I can't do it without you. I want to grow old with you and be those two crazy old ladies in the retirement home. I want the good and the bad with you. I want it all with you. I am so sorry. I love you so fucking much, Chloe Beale."

"We can just put all of this behind us. Just please, please come home. That's all I want."

I set my suitcase down on the porch. My ring was still sitting on the chair where I had last left it. So I wiggled it back onto my finger and took a deep breath.

"I will, just open the door."

"What?"

"Just open the door."

The line went quiet except for the faint sound of her footsteps coming closer until I could hear them on the other side of the front door. After the locks were undone, the door swung open to reveal Chloe. She stood there in one of my hoodies, the dark circles from sleepless nights hung under her glistening eyes yet she still look so beautiful. She dropped the phone and pulled me into a hug without saying a word.

I felt her tears soak my shoulder and her body shook violently as she gasped for air. Burying myself in the crook of her neck, I breathed in the familiar scent of the woman.

I don't know how long we stood there. I don't care how long we stood there. I missed her so much, and I was so glad to be right back in her arms.