BIRDIE: Today we have an exciting story! *squeals*
SHY: What, you mean that crackfic Momo ((AUTHOR)) wrote when she was bored in English?
MOMO: Hey, fourth period English is boring!
SHY: Yeah, well, let's get this over with.
BIRDIE: *dramatic voice* ARE YOU READY?
MIMIKO: *clips backpack* *derp voice* I'M READY FOR SCHOOL! :D
"Hello everyone! My name is Birdie R. Curls, and I am here to talk to the one, the only, *NAME REVOKED*!" A *REVOKED* woman announces.
"Hello, yes, hello, my name is *NAME REVOKED*, and I am here to tell you my story," a *REVOKED* teen sighs. Birdie, the *REVOKED* woman, sits down next to the teen.
"So, how did it happen?"
"Well we were in the car, when suddenly, it broke down. My boyfriend, *NAME REVOKED*, went to go get full for the car."
"Full?" Birdie asks, confused. The teen continues.
"I stayed in the car because there had been reports of steres being stolen."
"Steres?" Birdie questions.
"So about an hour later, I heard scratching noise and voice say CAPS ON 'let me in' CAPS OFF, but I didn't, so then I went to sleep."
"That makes perfect sense," Birdie comments, leaning in.
"Well, in the morning," the teen begins to sob. "In the morning, he wasn't there! *NAME REVOKED* wasn't there!" She begins sobbing hysterically and uncontrollably.
"Then what?"
"Then…"
"Yes?"
"Then…"
"Yes?!"
"THEN…"
"WHAT?!"
The teen passes out. Just before falling, she screams out ((*cue the dramatic sad music*)) six beautiful, simple, meaningless words.
"MAN DOOR HAND HOOK CAR DOOR!"
Then, *NAME REVOKED* passes on to another world. Birdie dramatically shuts off the music and sighs loudly. She winks at the audience and leans back, using *NAME REVOKED*'s fallen corpse as a footrest.
"Um," she says, holding the microphone. "L2 grammar,"
And with that, the curtains close, the audience applauds, Violet throws Nutella by the jar, and Mimiko yells something about being ready for school.
The End.
MIMIKO: *derp voice* IS SCHOOL OVER? :D
BIRDIE: Uh, yeah I guess.
MIMIKO: Thank god, that voice was hard to maintain.
SHY: That was better than any school I've ever seen!
MIMIKO & BIRDIE: THAT'S BECAUSE YOU DON'T GO TO OUR SCHOOL!
