Chapter 1, Getting Ready

Pearl Krabs awoke from her floral-patterned bed and looked excitedly at the morning sun through her window. Today she was sixteen years old. She then frowned sadly as she knew what this meant. Mr. Krabs, her father, was going to throw her a cheap and lousy party. She hated her birthday parties as they were always cheap and lame. She'd always expect it to be fun and fabulous. Her father would promise, and then his cheap ways would win out again. But this time, she hoped, he'd listen.

The first thing she heard on the radio was Boys Who Cry's newest song, "Birthday Girl". Pearl fantasied herself with Boys Who Cry quite often, and this time her fantasy was about the boy-band serenading her with their latest song. But then, her thoughts were interrupted by Mr. Krabs calling her for breakfast. She made her way downstairs.

"Daddy, today's the day!" she yelled. She sat down at the breakfast table as she got herself an orange to go with her bacon. "What?" Mr. Krabs asked as he looked up from his newspaper, puzzled. Pearl answered, "It's my birthday!". Mr. Krabs laughed. He said, "Oh yeah. What are you going to be, twelve?" "I'm going to be sixteen!" Pearl angrily replied. "The greatest day of all. But if I don't have a great party, I'm gonna drop out of high school, I won't go to college, my reputation's gonna collapse, and I'll never leave home! I'LL NEVER LEAVE HOME!" Mr. Krabs just stared and reassured to Pearl that everything would be alright. Then they both ate breakfast together.

Pearl then had to make a tuna-fish sandwich to bring to school for lunch. As she was spreading the mayonnaise, she was asking Mr. Krabs if he was going to be cheap this year. He replied "Darling, I'll try not to be cheap." Pearl glared at him and said, "Well, you BETTER". She packed her sandwich in a sandwich bag, then put that in a brown-bag. She put the bag in her backpack, and ran off to the bus.