Hey, this is my first fanfic so sorry if its not very good... I can promise you there will be more Tom later on :) *btw, this takes place before Tom and Sam get together. Please R&R!
She took deep breaths, calming down her shaking body. Her eyes were screwed tight with fear and her hands were balled up into tight fists around the bed sheet. She locked her jaws together to stop herself from screaming out. "It's not real Sam, it's not real." She whispered to herself over and over. Slowly, she peeled open her eyes and with a huge sigh of relief she laughed to herself under her breath, trying to stop the tears. Her clock showed the time 3:45 and it was beginning to get light outside; she would never get back to sleep now. The nightmares had started a few months ago – when the letter had arrived – the letter itself didn't bother her too much (that's what she kept telling herself anyway), it was the fact that there was a letter, labelled to HER address that made her blood go cold in fear.
Shivering, she silently got out of bed and padded down to the kitchen and began to make Ben's packed lunch. She flicked on the radio and began humming along to one of her favourite bands. She was just putting everything into a small lunchbox when a little head popped up behind the door. Seeing Sam he ran over and flung his arms around her neck,
"Hello," she laughed, giving him a little squeeze, "what are you doing up this early?"
"Can't sleep." He replied with a yawn.
"Why's that then, hey?" She asked him softly, stroking his blond/brown hair (which happened to be exactly the same colour as her own hair.) He didn't reply, just carried on hugging her with his thumb plastered firmly in his mouth. Sam could tell he was tired; he hadn't been sleeping well recently, but he was always very good about it and rarely woke her up. But most of the time she was up anyway, and he often came to find her. He was so young (only four) and yet so mature for his age. She smiled as he curled up in her arms with his head buried in her neck. Carefully she carried him through to her bedroom and laid him down on her bed, drawing the covers up to his chin. She kissed him on the top of his head and went back downstairs, looking behind her numerous times to check he was still sleeping.
She had a lot of paperwork to do that she hadn't had time to do at work and Zoe had made it very clear that it had to be done by the afternoon. Grumbling under her breath, she picked up her pen and began to fill in the endless forms. When she was about halfway through she began to get a headache which didn't seem to go away. Angry she knocked back her chair and rushed over to the medicine cupboard and grabbed out a packet of Paracetamol. What!? The packet was empty. She rummaged around at the back of the cupboard but there was no more. Whoa, she'd been having more headaches than she realised lately. Angrily she slammed the cupboard door closed, but instantly regretted doing so because it resulted in her headache tripling in pain. Rubbing her temples she began to flick through the diary to check if she had anything important happening that day. 10th… 11th… ah, the 12th of August. Her head was still aching from before and her vision had become all blurred but she managed to make out the neat writing: 'Ben has inset day – find a babysitter' Oh crap. She had completely forgotten! She had loads going on at work at the moment and an important meeting about her and a patient tomorrow, and Nancy (her neighbour, who looks after Ben after school) was on holiday. Oh god, she had not a clue what to do. She looked at the clock 6:45. She had to leave in half an hour if she was going to make it to work on time, and she wasn't exactly in Zoe's good books at the moment.
Exasperated she ran over to where she kept Ben's class list and read through it hoping to find somebody who lived nearby – but not too nearby that she would have to speak to them after today if she bumped into them on the street. Luckily there was one house that was about a seven minute drive away from her flat, and was only a tiny bit off-course from the ED. With her fingers crossed she quickly dialled the number and prayed for someone to pick up. To her surprise, a woman picked up just after the first ring and in a very cheerful voice, almost yelled "hello", causing Sam to move the phone away from her ear with a wince – that certainly hadn't helped cure her headache. Sam put on her best bright voice and tried to sound as 'mumsy' as possible without making herself cringe.
"Hi, is that…" she quickly scanned the list of names until she found the right person, "…William's mum? Oh yes hi, I'm Sam, Ben's Mum… ok, hi Julie… Yes, he and Ben are in the same class." As she began to speak the woman, now named Julie, began to get excited at the prospect of having another Mum to talk to, or talk at as it turned out to be. She listened through clenched teeth as the women listed all of her son's achievements and cursed under her breath as she struggled to get a word in edgeways. "Yes… oh yes now-… So I was wonder-… would it be possib-" she had to fight her desperate need to just hang up there and then. Finally she got Julie's attention. "Oh yes, well I was wondering, seeing as the boys have an inset day today and I still have to go to work, would it be possible for him to come and stay with you just for today?" She bit her lip nervously. This conversation had to end soon; she didn't know how much longer she could take. "Oh thank you! Yes… Yes of course, I'll come and pick him up as soon as I finish at work… I've already packed him a lunch so you don't have to worry about that… Can I drop him off now? Yes, he's really well behaved – he'll be no trouble I can assure you… Yes, thanks again, bye… yes, you too… bye, see you later, bye" She peeled the phone of her ear and put it down with a sigh of disgust; she really disliked typical mums. They were always so annoying and with their fake laughs and smiles, AND they almost never worked and fell into that typical husband/wife stereotype. If she had ever had a child with Dylan, something that would never have happened anyway, she wouldn't have followed the crowd: she loved her job and nothing would ever stop her from doing it. Sam herself had never actually planned to have a child, especially not whilst she was single and a full time worker, but at the time she didn't have a choice. She shook her head slowly – the circumstances under which she had Ben were not nice at all.
She glanced at the clock. 7:10 – the conversation on the phone had taken much longer than she had anticipated. She quickly rushed upstairs and was relieved to find Ben already up and trying to get a jumper over his head. She laughed and went over to help him.
"Mummy, can I stay at home with you today?" She struggled to look him right in the eye because she was worried he'd see the guilt in her eyes.
"I've got an even better idea!" He looked at her wearily, still holding her gaze – others found his eyes off putting; much like Sam he could continue staring someone in the eye without backing down, but neither of them realised. "Why don't you spend the day with a friend from school? William lives close to us and if you like it there then you can go round again." She laughed as he gave her a typical 'Are you serious?' look (a look that wouldn't have looked out of place on a teenager) and pulled him down onto her lap. "Look, I'm really sorry Ben, it's only for one day" He still looked grumpy; His face was scrunched up tight and he had his arms crossed tightly over his body. "I have to say I don't blame you, his Mum is very annoying" She whispered in his ear and then laughed as she watched his attempt as he tried to keep a straight face and remain serious. "Come on grumpy! What about if I give you a little piece of chocolate to help you survive?" She looked at him questioningly as he thought about the offer.
"But what about Todd? He'll feel left out if I get some chocolate and he doesn't" He was of course talking about his favourite teddy.
"Well we'll have to give him a piece as well, wont we" This seemed to satisfy Ben as he jumped up off Sam's lap and tried to pull her up. "That's got you a bit more excited hasn't it now?" She laughed heaving herself up, grabbing Todd who was lying on the floor next to them and led Ben downstairs.
She took his lunch box out of the fridge, picked up her keys and left the house taking one quick look at the clock: 7:40. Her shift started in five minutes. Zoe was going to kill her.
Well I hope you liked it... I'll update soon
