Old Friends

Rafael helps Olivia track down an old friend for Christmas.

* A/N- This story takes place in the same verse as my main story- The Unforgettable Fire. While the two go together, the main story does not have to be read to understand this one. *

December 2014- Two Weeks Before Christmas- Manhattan Supreme Court

"Okay Amy, you will sit here by the judge and Olivia will sit right over there behind the table where I sit. When I am not sitting, I am going to be standing by this corner of the witness stand. And the whole time you can focus on either Olivia or me, okay," Rafael spoke softly to their young victim. Amy Jones was 8 years old and was sexually assaulted by her babysitter's husband. Her case was going to trial and despite efforts to keep Amy from testifying, Rafael needed to call her to the stand. He wished there was another way. Testifying for an adult victim was always difficult but for a child the fear was insurmountable.

"Will my mommy be there?" Amy asked as she clutched a small fuzzy orange and white stuffed cat that she affectionately called Simba tightly.

"Of course she will, honey. She will be sitting right next to me," Olivia kneeled down next to her.

"But he will be sitting over there." Amy was visibly nervous as she looked over to the defense's side of the courtroom.

"He won't be able to ask you questions or even talk to you after you answer all the questions, Amy. Only his lawyer can talk to you, that's part of how it works. But I will make sure he doesn't ask you anything he shouldn't." Rafael said in the hopes it wouldn't upset her. Finding the balance between being honest and protecting young victims was hard. Rafael always struggled with this. His instincts told him that he needed to shelter them and take care of them but the lawyer in him understood the harsh realities of trying cases.

"Mr. Faulkner…he can't hurt you. Rafael and I won't let him. We promise," Olivia said as she put her hand on the little girl's shoulder."

Amy sniffled a little bit as a tear rolled down her cheek. "Okay…um…Rafael?"

"Yes?"

"Would it be okay if I brought Simba with me when you ask me questions?"

"Of course you can bring Simba with you. That would be just fine. Don't you worry, okay?" Rafael smiled warmly as he watched relief come over her face.

Olivia added, "And, when you get scared you just hug him tight okay? And I think we are done here for now, why don't we go try to find your mom. I think she is waiting outside for you."

Amy nodded as she stepped down out from the witness stand and reached for Olivia's hand. Olivia led her out of the courtroom and down the hall to meet her mom. When she returned she found Rafael packing up his case notes.

"That was really sweet of you to let Amy have her stuffed animal on the stand," Olivia said softly.

Rafael looked down at the table and gave a slight smile. "She's scared. I just…I just want to help her through this."

Olivia nodded. "She sure does love that little stuffed cat."

Rafael smiled, "She does, doesn't she? I don't think I have ever seen her without it."

"Did you ever have a toy or something as a kid that you always had with you when you were scared?"

" Yeah, I did. I had a stuffed tan and brown dog that I took everywhere when I was little. I named him Oso."

"You had a stuffed dog? I would have pegged you for a teddy bear person, Rafael," Olivia grinned.

"Nope, I had a dog…who's name means Bear. My sister actually had a teddy bear so I needed to be different," Rafael laughed, "How about you? Did you have a stuffed animal as a kid?"

"I did. I had a little teddy bear. He helped me get through a lot as a kid…both bad and good." Olivia replied.

Rafael opened his mouth to ask Olivia about her bear when Olivia's phone began to ring. She pulled out her phone and saw Fin's name appear on her screen.

"Hang on one sec. I need to take this," she said as she slide her thumb across the screen, "Hey Fin, what's going on….oh okay…Yeah I am at the court house. I can come back to the station house. Give me 15." Olivia ended her call and sighed. She was clearly frustrated by her current situation.

"Everything okay?"

"Yeah…Fin said Nick and Amanda brought in a possible suspect in the East Harlem rapes. Cragen wants me back."

Rafael nodded. "Are we still on for dinner at 7?"

Olivia smiled warmly, "Of course!"


1972- Manhattan

Serena stood in the doorway to her young daughter's room clutching a bag from one of the local toy stores in her hand. She desperately wanted to drink but today she needed to stay sober. She watched her sweet-faced three-year-old child play happily in the far corner of her room. Serena knew this was not going to be easy so she took a deep breath. She had no idea how she was going to tell her the news. She hoped the new teddy bear would help take some of the hurt away.

"Olivia, can you stop playing for a minute? Mommy needs to talk to you," Serena called

Olivia trotted over to Serena. "Yes, Mommy?"

Serena sat down on the end of the bed, Come sit down next to me," she patted the spot next to her. " I need to talk to you…it's about Grammy."

"Grammy? Are we going to visit her today?" Olivia asked hopefully.

"No, sweetie."

"Is Grammy going to come visit us?"

Serena stroked Olivia's hair gently. "Grammy…she won't be coming over either," Serena swallowed hard, "Honey, Grammy passed away last night."

"Passed away? What does that mean, Mommy?"

"It means that sometimes when sometimes people get old and they die…they pass on to heaven," Serena said sadly as she reached out for her daughter.

"Grammy died? No…but why? It's not fair!" Olivia asked as she snuggled close to Serena.

"I know, sweetie, that it isn't fair. Dying is part of getting old. It happens to everyone. Just remember this she loved you very much. You were her special little girl."

"But…who's gonna play with me and make me cookies?" Olivia started to cry.

"You still have me…I might not be able to make cookies like Grammy but I can try."

"Not the same…"Olivia sniffled as she rubbed the tears out of her eyes.

"I know…I want you to know that it's okay to cry if you get sad and it's okay to cry a lot," Serena said as she tried to comfort her daughter.

"I'm gonna miss her lots."

"I'm going to miss her too…but you know what?" Serena said as she reached for the bag and pulled out a soft light brown teddy bear with a small heart stitched into its chest. "Whenever you get sad and lonely, you just hug this little bear and it will all be okay."

Serena handed Olivia the bear and Olivia hugged it tight. "I'm going to name him Rupert."


Rafael had picked up Olivia at 7pm on the dot. She had managed to duck out of the squad room without much notice. Nick and Amanda seemed to have the interrogation under control with Fin and Munch standing on the sidelines waiting to take over in needed. This gave Olivia the perfect opportunity to call it a night. After all, she had a very important dinner date that she needed to attend.

They arrived at their favorite restaurant in Chelsea and were given their usual table in the back. It has become their regular Thursday night thing since they started seeing each other. During Olivia's recovery, this became one of the few things she looked forward to the most.

Tonight, Olivia ordered glass of red wine and Rafael got his customary scotch on the rocks. Given the events of earlier, a stiff drink and a relaxing meal was what they both needed.

Rafael took a long sip of his drink before turning to Olivia. "So, how did things go with the suspect?"

"Eh…I left it in Nick and Amanda's hands. I don't want to think about work anymore today," Olivia said softly as she reached for Rafael's hand. "I just want to have a nice evening with you."

Rafael smiled and squeezed her hand. "Sounds good to me. So…I'm curious about that little bear you had as a kid. Why didn't you tell me about him sooner?"

"I could say the same thing to you, Rafael, about your stuffed dog," Olivia chuckled.

"Good point. But in all seriousness, tell me about him. I want to know."

"You really want to know? It's probably not the most exciting story in the world."

"But it was something that mattered to you so it's important," Rafael said as he started stroking the top of her hand with his thumb.

"Well he was a soft teddy bear and was a tan to light brown color. His paws had little black pads and his eyes were dark brown. And he had this little red heart stitched into his chest. My mother brought him home for me the day she told me my grandmother died. I guess it was her way of helping me deal with the grief," Olivia shook her head, "So when she gave him to me, I decided that this little bear needed to be named Rupert."

"Rupert?"

"I'm not sure what was going through my three year old brain but I guess it made perfect sense at the time. He was a great little bear. I brought him with me everywhere when I was a kid. There were times when things were really bad at home and I would spend hours hugging him tight, just hoping things would get better for my mom and me." Olivia felt tears begin to build up in her eyes. She looked down at the table and squeezed Rafael's hand.

"Oh Liv," Rafael could hear the hurt in Olivia's voice. Every time, Olivia talked about her childhood, it made his heart ache and each time he desperately wanted to take her pain away.

Olivia hastily wiped her eyes. "I'm okay," she whispered.

Rafael knew she was lying but he knew this meant she was done talking about her mom. They had been down this road before. So he decided to focus the conversation on her teddy bear. "So where is Rupert now?"

Olivia shook her head. "I don't know. He went missing right before I moved out of my mom's house to head off to college. I thought I had packed him in a safe spot to bring him with me but when I unpacked, he wasn't there. I remember asking my mom about it and she just said she hadn't seen him. I hope someone found him and loved him as much as I did."


1973- Manhattan

It was early one Saturday morning and a four year old Olivia was contently eating her cereal watching Saturday morning cartoons. It was one of those rare occasions where food was allowed in the living room. With Rupert by her side, Olivia gleefully watched brightly colored animated figures dance across the screen.

Serena was about to join her daughter when the doorbell rang. When she opened it she immediately recognized the man standing there with a sad smile on his face, "Detective Conklin."

"Hello, Serena. Do you have a moment? We need to talk."

Serena looked back at her daughter who had taken notice to the man standing in the doorway. "Um…sure, please come in. Olivia, sweetie, can you go to your room?"

"Mommy what's wrong?" Olivia was scared. It wasn't every day that the police came by their house. Police only come by when something is wrong.

"Everything is okay. Mommy and the policeman here need to talk in private."

"Okay" Olivia complied as she picked up Rupert by his left paw and headed up the stairs towards her bedroom. But once Olivia got to the top of the stairs, she hid just out of view. She wanted to know what the policeman had to say. It sounded very important.

"Your daughter is getting so big, Serena. She looks a lot like you," Detective Conklin said softly.

Serena nodded. "She is a sweet girl." At least Olivia looked more like her than him…but her eyes…Olivia had his eyes. Every time she thought about it, she shuddered.

"Please, Detective, have a seat on the couch," She said as she sat on the far left corner, "Also, please don't mind the mess. Olivia decided to drag out some of her toys into the living room this morning to play."

"It's okay. My little ones do the same thing," he laughed as he sat down near her, "Look Serena…I got some news about your case…"

"My case? Did you get him? Please tell me you found him." There was a clear sense of desperation in her voice. She wanted to put this behind her so she and Olivia could live in peace.

Conklin lowered his head, "I wish I could tell you we did," he let out sigh, "But we have to close your case file, Serena."

"What do you mean close my case file?" Panic and anger began to over take her.

"Today is the five year mark on your case…in New York we have what is called statute of limitations and after five years, unsolved rape cases are closed."

"How? So if you find him tomorrow, he could never be punished for what he did to me?"

"That's correct. I'm so sorry Serena."

"Oh God…this means he's still out there. No…" Serena started to cry.

"I know this has to be hard for you…look, if you and Olivia need anything at all, I will be here to help."

"Help? Help would have been finding the man who raped me! You didn't help! Get out of my house!" Serena yelled.

As Conklin got up to leave, he turned to Serena and wanted to say something. But there weren't any words he could offer that would bring closure. He knew he failed her and her daughter. He left her crying on her couch.

Upstairs, Olivia heard the entire exchange and she could hear her mother's heavy sobs as the detective left their home. This wasn't the first time Olivia listened to Serena cry. Often, Serena would spend many nights crying alone in her room when she thought Olivia couldn't hear, but Olivia always heard.

She wanted to know why the policeman didn't do enough to help Serena. Policemen are supposed to help people but he didn't help her mom. Olivia figured that the policeman did something wrong and it was all his fault. It made her upset and she reached for Rupert.

"Rupert, one day, I am going to become a police officer and I am going to help Mommy. I'm going to find that bad man who hurt her and he is going to be punished. I am going to help her so she never has to cry or be upset ever again. I'm going to do it, Rupert. I'm going to make Mommy happy." Olivia buried her face into the top of her teddy bear and squeezed him hard.


After dinner, Olivia and Rafael decided to spend some time walking around Chelsea before returning home. It was two weeks before Christmas, and the storefronts all decked out to reflect the holiday season. This year marked the second Christmas the two of them were spending together and despite the events of the past few months, they were determined to make this Christmas special.

"The lights and everything are so pretty," Olivia said in awe as she wrapped her right arm around Rafael's left.

Rafael smiled at her, "It is very lovely, like you." Rafael leaned in and kissed her cheek, causing Olivia to blush.

As they made their way down the street, something caught Olivia's eye in one of the store windows. She let go of Rafael's arm and ran over to get a better look. "Oh my gosh! Rafael look!"

As Rafael got closer, he found what caught her eye. It was a fuzzy brown teddy bear with a heart on is chest. "Is that?" he asked almost in disbelief.

"I wish it was but that's what he looked like. It is almost exactly like him. The color of his paw pads are different though…these are brown not black."

"I can get him for you, if you'd like." Rafael was ready to burst into the store and grab the bear for her.

Olivia was touched by his eagerness to make her happy. She couldn't help but smile as his gesture but she had to decline. "No. It's okay. I appreciate the thought, Rafael. I really do. But it's not him."

Rafael nodded. He understood why Olivia turned down his offer. While that bear might have been a suitable replacement in different circumstances, tonight was not the case. Olivia's rejection sparked an idea. Now all Rafael needed was a plan to make this idea a reality.


1983- Manhattan

Bobby Richards...the one boy in the 9th grade that could reduce 14 year old Olivia Benson to a puddle. He had been her crush over a little over a year now but she was always too nervous to talk to him. Her friends had told her he liked her too but she didn't believe them until the day he asked her to the Homecoming Day dance. Olivia was ecstatic. She had never been to a Homecoming Day Dance before nor had she ever been on a date with a boy. This would be an evening of firsts for her. When Bobby arrived at Olivia's house to escort her to the dance, he gave her a pretty white flower to match her purple dress. When they attended the dance, Bobby held her hand most of the night and they danced every slow song together.

As Bobby walked her home after the dance, they stood outside her front door. Neither of them wanted the night to end. "You looked very pretty tonight, Olivia," Bobby blushed as he spoke. It took him all night to work up the courage to tell her.

"Thank you. You looked really nice too," Olivia said shyly, "And thank you for asking me to the dance, Bobby. I had a really fun time."

"Me too. Maybe…maybe…next week, we could go to the movies or get pizza or something?"

"I would like that a lot."

Bobby reached for Olivia's hands while their eyes met. He hesitated for a moment before leaning in. He kissed her. Olivia's heart skipped a beat. She was unsure what to do but followed her instincts and kissed him back. Their first kiss was gentle and sweet. Everything Olivia often daydreamed about.

Bobby pulled back and let go of her hands. "I better let you get inside…it's almost 11:30…I promised your mom you would be back by now. I don't want you to get in trouble so we can't go out again next week," he smiled at her as he spoke.

Olivia chuckled. "I can't wait until next week! It will be fun. You have a good night Bobby and I will see you at school on Monday."

"Good night, Olivia."

She watched as Bobby made his way down the street. As Bobby disappeared around the corner, Olivia hurried inside before her mom came downstairs to look for her. As she ran upstairs to her room, she just hit her what happened outside. Bobby Richards, the boy she had a crush on for so long, just kissed her and asked her out on a date. As she changed into her pajamas, she crawled in bed and reached for Rupert. She hugged him tight. She was so excited and happy. This was definitely the perfect ending to an already amazing night.


Christmas Morning- 2014

Olivia awoke Christmas morning to wonderful smells filling their apartment. She noticed Rafael's side of the bed was empty. She knew he was up to something in the kitchen. It wasn't just coffee she that she smelt, Olivia swore it was sugar cookies. She wondered when did Rafael become a baker. She climbed out of bed and headed towards the kitchen and living room to investigate.

Rafael greeted her as she entered kitchen and immediately handed her a cup of coffee. "Merry Christmas, Liv," He said as he kissed her cheek.

"Merry Christmas to you too. Mmm…what smells so good?"

"Besides me? I got up early to finish wrapping one of your presents and to make cookies to take to my mom's later today."

"One of my presents? I thought we put them all under the tree last night? And since when do you make cookies?"

Rafael just grinned as he reached for Olivia's hand and led her towards the living room. "Come on! Let's open presents! It is Christmas after all!"

Olivia chuckled at his sudden excitement as she followed him. They sat on the floor near the tree taking turns opening the gifts they got each other. They each got each other tacky Christmas sweaters. Olivia got Rafael one with a snowman and he got her one with a cat in a Santa Claus hat. They made a pact to wear them to his mom's house for dinner.

The last gift Olivia gave Rafael was a custom gold watch with the words, "my love forever – Liv" engraved on the back. "Oh wow! Liv! This is beautiful!" Rafael was in awe and as he turned it over to read the engraved message, he couldn't help but get a little choked up. He quickly worked to put his new watch on his wrist so he could fully admire it.

"Do you like it? I wanted to get you something a bit more meaningful than an ugly sweater and some of the other gifts I got you."

"This is truly an amazing gift, I love it so much!" Rafael leaned in and kissed her softly, "Mi amor, siempre."

Olivia wrapped her arms around him and snuggled close to him. "I don't think this Christmas could get any better."

Rafael hugged her tight, "I think it can…I got one more present for you." He let go of Olivia and went to grab the one last unwrapped present that was hiding behind their tree. He handed Olivia a medium sized box wrapped in special white and silver paper. He didn't say anything, just smiled broadly at her.

Olivia looked at Rafael slightly confused. She had no idea what could be in the box and why it was placed away from the other presents behind the tree. She carefully unwrapped it, revealing a box that matched the paper. "You got me a pretty box? Rafael, how did you know I wanted this?" she joked.

"No. Open the box!" Rafael could hardly contain his excitement.

Olivia pried open the box. "Oh my god! Could it be?" Olivia reached in and pulled out a brown teddy bear. She held him up and looked him over. "It's him! It's Rupert! Look! On his arm…that bald spot was where I put a band-aid on him…when I ripped it off, I took a chunk of his fur. And see here! It's the little heart on his chest I told you about!" Olivia hugged her little bear tightly and took a deep breath. "Oh god…it still smells like him. I can't believe you found him…you found Rupert," Olivia jumped up and hugged Rafael, "You brought him home. I thought he was lost forever. God, Rafael, I can't believe you did this for me. I just…I love you so much."

"I love you too. Hey…there's something else in the box," Rafael said softly.

Olivia pulled back and reached for the box. Inside were three items. She pulled the first one out; it was a framed photo. "It's a picture of me on the day I graduated from the Academy…this frame…my mom had this frame…" She reached in the box and pulled out two more items. One was a lace handkerchief and the other was a Saint Michael medal. "Where did you find these? The lace handkerchief…this belonged to my mom…the photo frame…Rafael how did you…"

"I found them all in your mom's stuff, Liv. When I got the idea to find Rupert for you, I went to your mom's old university to talk to some folks who knew your mom, in the hopes they could help me find him. They told me that you never came to pick up your mom's things from her office after she passed. They boxed them up and put them in storage. So they let me look through them. I found Rupert, the photo, the medal and the handkerchief all in a box labeled desk items. One of the secretaries told me that your mom kept them all on her desk together. She said your mom was always so proud of you. The day you made detective, she said that your mom called it one of the happiest moments of her life."

"She had him the whole time…he didn't go missing. My mom had him," Olivia whispered as she sat down on the couch, clutching Rupert and the other items in her hands tightly.

"Yeah. She wanted to keep you close after you moved out," Rafael said as he set down next to her and put his arm around her.

Olivia started to cry. "She really was proud of me?"

Rafael smiled and squeezed her hand. "She was."

"Thank you for finding Rupert and for all of this. This is the best gift anyone has ever given me," she said, as she turned to hug him as tight as she could.

They stayed in locked in each other's arms until the telephone began to ring. "I better go answer it. It is probably my mom wondering when we will be over for dinner," Rafael chuckled, as he leaned in and kissed Olivia, "I love you."

"I love you too."

As Rafael rushed off to answer the phone, Olivia held up the little bear again and studied him. He looked exactly like he did the last time she saw him. Here they were so many years later. They were finally together again. Olivia smiled and whispered, "Welcome home Rupert. I missed you."