Phil was lonely.

Don't get me wrong...

Phil had friends and family that loved him. He had everything he could ever want. But he always felt he was missing something. Or someone.

He wanted love. But, of course, he couldn't find someone to love. He thought he was too weird. That's what everyone told him. Phil had always been different. He had a strange imagination, a tendency to not blink, and he would always get off topic. Plus, he was bisexual.

Phil had a best friend. Dan.

See, Dan was quite different from Phil. Always making girls' (and guys) hearts melt. Only ever been labeled as the 'charming' one. Had more subscribers than Phil. Always one step ahead of Phil in everything.

Phil didn't mind though. A couple of years ago, he had grown feelings for Dan. And it killed him. No, not because Dan wasn't gay or homophobic (he was actually bisexual as well), but it was because Dan had a girlfriend whom many of times he would express to Phil how much he loved her. How badly he wanted to spend the rest of his life with her.

Phil tried to move on. He would always smile and nod when Dan would mention her. He had been living behind a façade. Dan never noticed.

One day, Phil was all alone at home. Dan was off on his usual visit to the grocery store. Somehow, though, Phil had found himself standing in front of the bathroom mirror, with the door closed. Gazing at his own reflection, which stared directly back at him.

Huh, now I know why Dan is so much better than me, he thought. The person he saw in the mirror wasn't Phil Lester.

It was an ugly and worthless human being.

No matter how many times he tried, he couldn't look away from the polished metal.

CRACK!

He was bewildered. Blood was flowing down his hand, making soft drip sounds as it hit the sink.

What the hell happened?

The door to the bathroom slowly opened. Is Dan here? I didn't hear him come in...

"Dammit! Phil, what the hell happened?! Your freaking hand is bleeding! Did you punch the mirror?! Phil, explain!" Only now did Phil notice the mirror was indeed shattered. Had he smashed the mirror with his fist?

Many weeks had passed since that strange evening. Phil had no explanations for his odd behavior. Even stranger happenings have occurred, though. Lately, Dan would lock himself in his room and stay there, only ever leaving to grab food. Yesterday, though, he didn't leave his room at all. At first, Phil was clueless as to why Dan would hide away in his room. After a while, he had concluded that his girlfriend had broken up with him.

Phil had tried many times to reach out to Dan. It had been a while since he talked to his once cheery friend. Phil had finally had enough and wanted, no NEEDED, to talk to him.

"Dan?" He softly said, knocking on the door, hoping Dan heard him. He heard no footsteps. No voices. Nothing. So he decided to turn the knob, in hopes that it would open. And it did. A flood of relief washed over him. Soon, though, that relief was replaced with panic. It was pitch black. The only light that appeared in the room was from the hallway. It was also very quiet and still.

"...Phil." A voice sliced through the silence and almost made Phil jump. The voice, Dan's voice, was void of emotion. Phil made his way over to where he heard Dan. His foot hit something hard.

"Phil? Is that you?" He felt a hand grasp his leg.

"Yeah. What are you doing on the floor?" Dan let go and Phil sat down next to him.

"I..well..."

"Dan, please tell me what's wrong."

"..."

"Dan, please. You have been locked up in your room for the past couple of weeks. I've tried talking to you a few times before but you would never answer. Dammit. Dan, I'm so worried about you. And I miss yo-"

"She's gone, Phil."

"Alex?"

"Y-Yeah."

"...Did she...break up with you?"

"No. Dammit, Phil. She's gone! She committed suicide!" Phil was astonished, partly from Dan suddenly shouting, but mostly from what he had just been informed of. He couldn't find any words to say. Instead, he leaned over and gave Dan a comforting hug. He was shaking a droplets of tears fell upon Phil's arms.

"I...Did she...leave a note?"

"...Yeah. I-It said 'Dan, I'm sorry. I just c-couldn't handle it. I love you f-forever and always'."

"Dan, I'm so sorry. Honestly. I know saying sorry won't bring her back, but just know that I'm here." I'll always be here. You should know that, Dan.

"I just don't understand it. What couldn't sh-she handle? The fangirls? My career? Me? Y...you?" Me? What about me?

"Dan, I understand you've been mourning over her passing but, please, don't shy away from me. You know you have me. You always have. Don't hesitate to come talk to me."

"...Phil...just hold me."

And with those last words, the two fell into silence. Slowly, they fell into a deep slumber. Their arms resting around each other. Phil knew Dan was broken. But it was only temporary. He knew Dan would move on because he was strong. Dan knew his love for Alex wouldn't fade right away. But maybe love can bloom again with someone else. Someone close.