Disclaimer: I am not Adele (but I wish I could sing like her). I am also not C.C. (but I wish I could write like her.)


"I heard that you've settled down,

That you found a girl,

And you're married now…"


Magnus's hands shook as he held the invitation in his hands. It was printed on plain, white paper. It really wasn't anything special. But the words sent a knife through his heart.

You are invited to attend the wedding of Mr. and Mrs. Alexander Lightwood on October 26, 2011. Please come out to show your support for the happy couple.

He couldn't believe it. He really couldn't.

He and Alec had been in love. They'd had something special. They'd only broken up because of Magnus's immortality, saying it was for their own goods. Magnus had thought his world had ended that day.

But now he couldn't breathe. He couldn't move. He couldn't control himself. Alec had been his everything. His world. His one and only.

He still was.

Magnus blinked back the tears that threatened to fall.

He snapped, sending the invitation up in smoke.


"I hoped you see my face,

And that you'd be reminded,

That for me, it isn't over."


Alec's breathing was ragged as Rebecca came down the aisle, her dress flowing behind her like a river. Her hair was up in a complicated bun, a single strand of light blonde hair trailing down her cheek. Silver eyeshadow arched over her turquoise blue eyes. She was beautiful.

But Alec wasn't looking at her.

Just over her shoulder, in the very back row sat a man with brightly streaked and spiked hair, glitter covering every inch of his dark suit. Alec could see his bright, beautiful cat eyes from the altar, but that didn't matter; he'd committed those eyes—as well as the rest of that man—to memory long ago.

Now, the face that he remembered laughing, smiling, kissing him—it was a blank canvas. But Alec knew better than that; he knew Magnus better than that.

Locking eyes with the warlock, Alec knew that whatever they'd had before wasn't over.

For either of them.


"I heard that your dreams came true
Guess she gave you things

I didn't give to you…"


"Honestly, Alexander, had I known you would get over me that quickly—and for a woman nonetheless—I would never have continued our relationship farther than that first week." The warlock's tone was clipped and harsh. Seeing the hurt look in those blue eyes he had loved for so long, he immediately regretted his words.

Alec fiddled with the cuffs of his tuxedo, frowning as he stood at the edge of the balcony, looking out over the trees. Wasn't this supposed to be the best night of his life? "Magnus... You know why I did it."

The warlock moved to stand next to the younger man, clenching his jaw. "Do I?"

Alec turned to glance over his shoulder, checking for any passerby, before turning to the warlock. "What? Do you think I'm in love with her? Magnus, you and I both know we split because of our…age difference." He paused, getting lost in those feline green eyes. Starting to lean in, he licked his lips.

Just before their lips met, Alec pulled back, shaking his head and returning to the railing. He leaned against it breathing deeply. "I just thought that if I couldn't be happy with you, I figured I should do what would make my parents—and the Clave—happiest…"

Magnus hummed his answer, making it as non-committal as possible.

There was an awkward silence, both men having so much they wanted to say, but not quite knowing how to say it.

After a moment, Magnus said, "She's lovely." When the Shadowhunter nodded he said, "But you don't love her?"

Alec's head whipped over to look the warlock in the eyes. "No. Never."

He took a breath and added:

"She's not you."


"But I couldn't stay away,

I couldn't fight it..."


Magnus glanced at the picture on his bedside table. He'd never thought to get rid of it; he probably never would.

It wasn't like it would suddenly remind him of the Shadowhunter on a good day, effectively ruining it. Or that there never were good days.

It was that he never stopped thinking of him.
Of his face that Magnus had never stopped dreaming of. Of his hair the other man would give anything to run a hand through one last time. His lips that begged to be kissed whenever Magnus was around. His eyes that were bluer than the ocean itself. Of his smile that lit up his whole face and that of any on-looker who was lucky enough to glimpse it. Of his blush that had grown brighter every time the warlock had used to compliment him.
He couldn't stop thinking about the man that was no longer his.


"Regrets and mistakes,
They are memories made. Who would have known,
How bittersweet this would taste?"


Alec flinched as Rebecca pressed her lips eagerly to his, winding her thin arms around his neck. His hands found her hips awkwardly and he held her slightly away from himself, but not far enough for her to notice.

It was all so wrong.

There were supposed to be strong hands on his hips, his arms circling another's neck. When he opened his eyes slightly, he should have been looking up into bright green. Not down into bright blue.
He frowned as she threw open the door to their honeymoon suite, pulling him inside. Their lips were attached again as Rebecca tugged him towards the bed. They fell down against it, a mess of tangled limbs, and she pulled back.
"Allie," she breathed. "I love you." Alec choked slightly at the nickname-he did every time.

"I-I...love you too."


Author's Note: Depressing, eh?

Peace, Love, Mark, and Iggy.

Kierstin.