Breaking Through The Barrier
AN: Okay so this idea for this actually came to me a dream (I know right, what does that say about me?) but it was an interesting idea so I thought I'd make it into a little oneshot. Hope you enjoy! And don't forget to drop me a review once you're done ;)
There was something about running headlong into a brick wall that you could just never get used to. No matter that she had done it dozens of times before; Lily always had a horrible feeling in her stomach whenever it was time to catch the Hogwarts Express. Her body still solidly refused to believe what her brain told it, that no harm would ever come to her from walking through the barrier.
And that was why Lily Evans, about to board the train to school for her very last term at Hogwarts School for Witchcraft and Wizardry, was currently standing in Kings Cross Station staring at the brick wall between platforms 9 and 10. As she did every time, Lily deliberately turned up at the last minute to avoid having to cross through the barrier with other students watching, pressurising her.
Stop being stupid, she told herself, Just push your trolley through. She was just about to go for it when a familiar voice broke through her thoughts.
"Good morning Lillikins!"
She narrowed her eyes, "Potter." Turning to face him she noticed how tanned his face was, he's obviously been out playing quidditch over the Easter break, and then, shut up Lily, what do you care?
"Caught you daydreaming about me did I?" He shot her a lopsided grin as he brought his trolley to a stop beside hers.
"I wasn't daydreaming." Lily replied indignantly, "And definitely not about you! I was…waiting for someone." She stared at him fiercely, daring him to contradict her.
"Really?" There it was, his usual smirk he wore when he thought he was right about something. It annoyed Lily no end and it had been her constant companion over the last year as she'd been forced to work with him as he was Head Boy to her Head Girl. "Because the train's due to leave in about two minutes so whoever they are either isn't planning on coming to school this term or has stood you up."
Lily felt her face grow hot. But before she could snap back the retort that was on the tip of her tongue, James' co-conspirator and best friend arrived; Sirius Black.
"Alright Lovebirds?" he swung both his arms around Lily and James, squeezing them together so that all three of their heads touched. "As much as I hate to break up this lovely moment you two are clearly sharing - we are meant to be on that train in approximately 110 seconds."
"Chill Sirius!" James swung his arm round Sirius' shoulders as well. Lily tried hard not to notice the heat of his hand as it brushed against her neck. "As if they would ever leave without us, we're the two most important people in the school!"
"Too right we are! I wonder how they'll manage without us next year? We'll have to do something special for dear Minerva to remember us by, and we'll have to leave something for Filch – "
"Er Sirius?" James cut him off, "I meant Lily and I."
Sirius clutched his heart dramatically, "You wound me! I thought we were friends! Oh cruel world how have I been demoted so?" Lily couldn't help but chuckle. Still spouting nonsense he pushed his own trolley through the barrier leaving Lily and James standing there.
Still laughing she glanced sideways to see James smiling back at her, his eyes twinkling. Without meaning too she felt herself blush, stupid fair skin, she thought as she quickly turned to stare at the ground
"So, seeing as whoever you were, ahem, waiting for, clearly isn't here; how about I accompany you through?"
Immediately Lily tensed up. There was Potter trying to chat her up again. This time last year she would have stormed off and probably hexed him for good measure. But having spent the past year with him they had grown closer, there were times when she nearly considered them friends. She now understood that beneath his cheeky remarks there was actually kindness. So she paused. Which in hindsight was probably a bad idea as James seemed to take it as a yes.
"Ladies first then." He placed a hand on Lily's back to usher her through but she didn't move. James looked up at her face to see her staring straight ahead, a tiny crease of concern in between her brows. "Er Lily, are you okay? Only you haven't hit me for touching you..." He let out a deep chuckle but got no response from Lily. "Lil…? What's wrong?"
Stop blushing, stop blushing! "It's nothing, I'm just being stupid."
"You could never be stupid Lily." He replied softly and she looked up to see his face worryingly close to her own.
"It's just… I always get nervous running through the barrier." She waited for him to laugh but he didn't.
"That's not stupid Lil. Hell that probably makes you more normal than everyone else on the platform!" He reached round and picked her trunk up off of her trolley, placing it on top of his own on his trolley. "We'll do it together."
Suddenly she felt his hand take hers. She looked down in shock as his fingers tightened around hers, his hand was so much larger than hers and for some reason so much warmer. It sort of felt… comfortable. Stop thinking that right now! She screamed at herself. She looked up at his face, about to tell him to let go. She expected to be met with his smirk again but instead he wasn't even looking at her, he was staring straight ahead at the barrier. So she didn't say anything. Instead she let her hand relax into his and with her free hand she took hold of the other side of the trolley.
"On three then. One, two … three!" they both pushed off and ran towards the barrier. Lily shut her eyes, letting James guide her. Her hand tightened its hold on his as she prepared for the impact that she knew would never actually…oof!
They had hit something. Not a brick wall, it felt more like the side of a bouncy castle they had just rebounded off of and as a result they had just been thrown backwards rather hard. Lily found herself sprawled on the floor. Her eyes snapped open. Then she blinked. She couldn't see anything. Her world had turned black.
Lily panicked. "Potter!"
"Lily! Where are you?" She looked over in the direction of his voice but she still couldn't see anything.
"Here! Potter, I can't see a thing!"
"Me neither!"
Lily reached her arm out blindly in front of her as she scrambled to her feet. Her hand connected with a solid object. A warm, muscly, object that she knew was probably Potter's chest. Thank goodness for dark, she thought, her face had probably grown as red as a tomato.
"Lily!" She felt his hand grasp her shoulder as he tried to work out where she was. "Are you alright?"
The darkness was pressing in from all around but apart from the shock Lily was alright. "Yes, I'm fine" She heard her voice crack embarrassingly as she felt the hot sting of tears welling up in her eyes. The child inside her was terrified of this dark place.
"It's okay Lil, don't cry," James' arms slid around her and he pulled her into his chest. Hugging her close to him, "I'll get us out of here don't worry."
Not trusting herself to speak she nodded against his chest. Trying desperately not to notice how good his shirt smelt. Almost of their own accord she felt herself lift her arms up and wrap them tightly around his waist. She heard him inhale sharply and felt his arm muscles clench around her.
"Lily." He breathed. She knew why. In her wildest dreams she would never have hugged James Potter, but in his she knew that she probably did a lot more than hug him. He was taking full advantage of the situation and had leant his head down next to hers, breathing in her smell.
Neither of them said anything for a moment and Lily realised that James would never be the first to pull away from their embrace so she did, still holding onto his arm so as to not become separated. She pulled out her wand, "Lumos" Nothing happened.
"What if the train leaves without us?" she spoke her fear aloud, the train surely should have left by now. "We have to get out of here!"
"Well, I'd love to Lillikins, but gee I'm not sure where here even is!" James laughed loudly and she could tell he was trying to sound nonchalant for her but the truth was this darkness was getting to both of them. Lily didn't laugh either but transferred her hold on James' arm down to his hand. She held it gently, her previous shock and fear subsiding and her normal logical attitude taking over.
"Here, move with me. Try and feel anything that could give us a clue to work out where we are. " Together they shuffled forwards, arms reaching out in the darkness.
"I've found something!" James exclaimed.
"Ouch! That's my hair Potter, stop tugging it!"
"Whoops, sorry Lillikins."
"And stop calling me that." She snapped. Then she regretted it as James remained silent. It was just so easy to just slip back into the old routine of insulting him when really she couldn't get the smell of his shirt out of her head and she couldn't stop thinking about how well her hand fit in his.
"Wait, this time it isn't you. I think it's a wall." He tugged her hand to join his and she felt the rough brick that he was talking about.
"Do you think it's the barrier?" Lily wondered aloud. The bricks were of the same size and texture, she could almost picture the entrance to platform 9¾ in front of her.
"To the platform? Could be. I suppose maybe we missed the train, arrived too late and the barrier shut around us."
"No." Lily shook her head, "the barrier doesn't close as soon as the train leaves, the parents use it to leave by again don't they?"
By this time they had shuffled along, trying to feel where the wall stopped and had turned full circle, realising that they were in a small brick walled room. Curiously like the inside of the barrier might feel like if it was hollow.
"So what do you think happened then?"
"I don't know." She thought back to what had happened before they got stuck in this place. She had been standing on the platform, about to go through, when Potter had come along, followed shortly by Black….Black! He was always pulling stupid pranks like this. This wasn't the first time her and Potter had been stuck somewhere together. At the end of last year Sirius had locked the two of them in the potion's cupboard in an attempt to bring them together. The fact that it had resulted in both of them sprouting inch wide boils all over their faces due to Potter accidently knocking over various bottles as he'd tried to slide his arm around her. This was such a typical prank that they would pull. Lily's eyes narrowed. "If this is another of you and Black's stupid pranks I'm going to hex you both into next week!"
"What!" James spluttered, "Lily I would never - well I know we used to – but, I've changed!"
"Yeah, right, because when you spiked Severus' pumpkin juice last week with a babbling potion last week you were demonstrating real maturity!"
"He was asking for it!" James' grip on her hand had tightened uncomfortably. "You've heard him and his cronies, swanning about the school like they own the place, you've heard what they call people!"
"Funny, that description reminds me very much about you!"
"I would never insult you Lily!"
"So it is one rule for me and another for everyone else is it?" Lily was fuming. She yanked her hand out of Potter's and crossed her arms. "You need to seriously grow up Potter!"
James was stunned, this girl clearly had a personality disorder or something, no one in their right mind could go from hugging a bloke one minute to berating him the next.
"Says the girl who immediately blames me as soon as anything goes wrong! I'm sick of it Evans, sure I used to be a prankster but I've grown up now and you know it. I jump through every single hoop you put in front of me but still I'm never good enough for you, am I? If you're so much better than me then why don't you find your own way out of here?"
Lily didn't say anything. His words stung her but not as much as her own had. She knew why she did it, why she argued with him constantly, but still she hated it. It was so much easier to blame Potter for everything that went wrong instead of taking responsibility herself. Yet here she was the one trying to lecture about maturity. Go figure. She let the tears trickle silently down her cheeks. Turning away from him she felt out the rough bricks of the walls surrounding them. "I'm sick of it too." She said quietly.
"What?" James spat the word out harshly.
"I'm sick of trying to find flaws in you when really I'm just waiting for you to see the flaws in me." Lily admitted still facing the wall. It didn't matter that he couldn't see her, even in the dark she couldn't bring herself to face him and admit it. "I'm the one who isn't good enough for you. When we were younger you used to be cruel and I thought I was so much better than you. But then you changed. And I haven't. I'm not the person that you are. I'm not brave enough to stand up to people like you do. I don't dream as big as you can. And I'm scared of holding you back."
James' head was spinning.
"There, you've heard it now. All the things I was only ever brave enough to say in the dark."
James reached out with his hand and found her hair again. He didn't tug it this time but let his hand burrow into it. Lily didn't pull away and he felt her turn towards him until his hand was resting on her cheek. He felt the wet streaks of her tears and brushed them away.
"You are brave Lily. Braver than you think you are. All those times you stood up to me, when no one else would. I changed for you. But I also changed because of you." He found her other hand with his and brought it up to his own face. He could feel her breath now, warm on his neck. "It's okay to be scared though, because I promise I will always be there to be brave for you."
Then he did the thing that he was only brave enough to do in the darkness. He kissed her. Softly. Tenderly. Lily froze for a moment and then smiled against his mouth before kissing him back He wrapped his arms around her and held her. Sheltering her from the darkness as only love can do.
And just like that the barrier around them dissolved and the light came flooding back in.
In a window of the Hogwarts express, three boys stood staring in disbelief at the couple.
"Padfoot please tell me you didn't…?" Remus cast a despairing look at his friend. "I thought you promised you wouldn't try to force them together this year!"
"Well promises are made to be broken my dear friend. I think it's worked out quite nicely though don't you?"
"Yeah, twenty third time lucky." Peter added, "Someone should probably tell them that the train's moving though…"
